Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
Yeah, but we don't want another to control. We want the other to love into forgiveness. We are not at the mercy of each other. We are to serve and forgiveness is serving, not having another control our situations. We cannot force forgiveness, it has to come out of Love of the other.
Most people who ask for forgiveness are only doing it because it's what's expected. In the actual forgiving, it has to come from the heart, the soul, in order for it to truely take place. This also has to come from the self if the reaction to the action was a negative. Both parties have to be involved whereas asking is only one sided. Does that make more sense?
Lets say someone hits you because they didn't like what you said. You, in turn, hit them back or say something that is negative. When that person asks you to forgive them and you do, you are still carrying that negative because you still haven't forgiven yourself for reacting negatively. One is forgiven and the other is not. Total forgiveness is for the self and the other. When we leave it one sided, one still needs the forgiveness even after 10 years has passed. Most people don't even think to forgive themselves so it's much harder to receive forgiveness.
Hi Rev,
please help me with what you wrote here.
Are you saying that if I do someone wrong, then I have to first ask myself for forgiveness??
Also, you say that most people ask forgiveness because it's expected. But I'm referring to honest, heart-felt asking for forgiveness. And what I'm seeing is that it is harder to ask forgiveness than it is to forgive.
So wronging another person is really only wronging God?? Is this why Christians can freely offend and emotionally hurt "unbelievers" by judging and condemning them, because they cannot wrong others?
Blessings,
brian
Well, no. They only think they can but their negative reaction will have a penalty and they will still need to forgive themselves. God doesn't need forgiveness. That is only something that needs done between the two actions.
Hi Rev,
please help me with what you wrote here.
Are you saying that if I do someone wrong, then I have to first ask myself for forgiveness??
Blessings,
brian
Not necessarily. As long as at some point in time both parties forgive, forgiveness will take place. It's just harder with the self because we usually see our actions as right even when they're wrong.
Not necessarily. As long as at some point in time both parties forgive, forgiveness will take place. It's just harder with the self because we usually see our actions as right even when they're wrong.
How is it that both parties must forgive, if only one party has offended?? I was always taught that the offending person should ask the forgiveness, and the offended party has the "power" to punish or forgive..
That makes asking forgiveness a very "risky" thing...!
Before I found the path I'm on now, I was not a very nice person because I had an ego that just wanted to run. Not necessarily a bad thing mind you but...
My parents abused me for the better part of my home life and those actions were ingrained into my soul. I thought what they did was right because i knew nothing else.
Well, when I finally woke up and found out about forgiveness and all the good things that come with religion or beliefs, I went through a cleansing period where I just went through my whole life and saw what I had done to others. Some bad and some not so bad but still not right. I had to fix everything I had done. Well, as I sat and looked at all of this, I asked GOd to forgive me. I knew right away that I didn't need to ask Him but I had to ask the other parties. This is next to impossible as this went all the way back to elementary school. I had no way of finding those people. I stole a record from a friend in 3rd grade. I had no Idea what her name was or even how to find her. So I forgave myself and cried like a baby because I felt the pain I had caused her for that action. It wasn't even murder but all the same. I had done wrong. I did this with every single action that I could remember and it was like a weight had been lifted. A big weight. So then, I preceded to ask God about her forgiveness of me. Well, come to find out, by loving myself and forgiving myself, I had drawn her to me through God and the action and reaction was forgiven. God can be a channel between two parties if one cannot be found or if we truely want that forgiveness. I did this with all that I could but most I justasked them to forgive me. I don't know if they all truely did but the ones who did, I felt that forgiveness and heard it in theri voice.
Even if we don't get all the forgiveness here, we still have time in the spirit world. Let go of the ones that can't and bless the ones who can. That way we don't carry the baggage and when the time is right, it will happen.
How is it that both parties must forgive, if only one party has offended?? I was always taught that the offending person should ask the forgiveness, and the offended party has the "power" to punish or forgive..
That makes asking forgiveness a very "risky" thing...!
Blessings,
brian
It's the reaction that needs the forgiveness because the self needs to correct the negative.
If someone hit you and you hit back, your just as wrong even if you didn't start it. It's never ok to harm another even if they harm you. We should always strive to react in the positive.
Forgiveness....to me is one of the hardest things to do. At least for me, but as my walk in Christ gets stronger, so does the power to forgive, and the first place that needs to start is within one's self.
If you can not forgive yourself, then you will never be able to accept someone else's forgiveness. Blessings
Before I found the path I'm on now, I was not a very nice person because I had an ego that just wanted to run. Not necessarily a bad thing mind you but...
My parents abused me for the better part of my home life and those actions were ingrained into my soul. I thought what they did was right because i knew nothing else.
Well, when I finally woke up and found out about forgiveness and all the good things that come with religion or beliefs, I went through a cleansing period where I just went through my whole life and saw what I had done to others. Some bad and some not so bad but still not right. I had to fix everything I had done. Well, as I sat and looked at all of this, I asked GOd to forgive me. I knew right away that I didn't need to ask Him but I had to ask the other parties. This is next to impossible as this went all the way back to elementary school. I had no way of finding those people. I stole a record from a friend in 3rd grade. I had no Idea what her name was or even how to find her. So I forgave myself and cried like a baby because I felt the pain I had caused her for that action. It wasn't even murder but all the same. I had done wrong. I did this with every single action that I could remember and it was like a weight had been lifted. A big weight. So then, I preceded to ask God about her forgiveness of me. Well, come to find out, by loving myself and forgiving myself, I had drawn her to me through God and the action and reaction was forgiven. God can be a channel between two parties if one cannot be found or if we truely want that forgiveness. I did this with all that I could but most I justasked them to forgive me. I don't know if they all truely did but the ones who did, I felt that forgiveness and heard it in theri voice.
Even if we don't get all the forgiveness here, we still have time in the spirit world. Let go of the ones that can't and bless the ones who can. That way we don't carry the baggage and when the time is right, it will happen.
Why would you think you don't need to ask God to forgive you?
Hi all,
we are told by Jesus to forgive. And if we forgive, we will also receive forgiveness ourselves.
And if we do not forgive each other, we ourselves will not receive forgiveness.
Which is harder to do? to forgive, or to ask forgiveness?
Curious to hear your thoughts..
Blessings to all,
brian
It really depends on what that person did...if someone molested my child (just an example) it would be near impossible for me to forgive that person, but in normal situations, I forgive people easily. So in most situations my answer would be it's harder to ask for forgiveness for me personally because I forgive easily (I'm not a grudge holder).
Before I found the path I'm on now, I was not a very nice person because I had an ego that just wanted to run. Not necessarily a bad thing mind you but...
My parents abused me for the better part of my home life and those actions were ingrained into my soul. I thought what they did was right because i knew nothing else.
Well, when I finally woke up and found out about forgiveness and all the good things that come with religion or beliefs, I went through a cleansing period where I just went through my whole life and saw what I had done to others. Some bad and some not so bad but still not right. I had to fix everything I had done. Well, as I sat and looked at all of this, I asked GOd to forgive me. I knew right away that I didn't need to ask Him but I had to ask the other parties. This is next to impossible as this went all the way back to elementary school. I had no way of finding those people. I stole a record from a friend in 3rd grade. I had no Idea what her name was or even how to find her. So I forgave myself and cried like a baby because I felt the pain I had caused her for that action. It wasn't even murder but all the same. I had done wrong. I did this with every single action that I could remember and it was like a weight had been lifted. A big weight. So then, I preceded to ask God about her forgiveness of me. Well, come to find out, by loving myself and forgiving myself, I had drawn her to me through God and the action and reaction was forgiven. God can be a channel between two parties if one cannot be found or if we truely want that forgiveness. I did this with all that I could but most I justasked them to forgive me. I don't know if they all truely did but the ones who did, I felt that forgiveness and heard it in theri voice.
Even if we don't get all the forgiveness here, we still have time in the spirit world. Let go of the ones that can't and bless the ones who can. That way we don't carry the baggage and when the time is right, it will happen.
I think that your parents should forgive you, you didn't deserve nor cause their abuse towards you. It is hard to ask forgiveness, and it sounds like they couldn't do it.
Actually, it sounds like you were the strongest one of all, because you were asking a lot of forgiveness. And I'm sure you were receiving forgiveness, too.
I have had times where I felt a deep need to ask forgiveness from my parents. The fact that they could forgive me was priceless.
On the other hand, my friend who died of cancer last month never forgave his parents for a wrong they committed. I do believe that it was they who suffered more than anyone else, and I'm sure they still do suffer. I could see it in them.
It's so hard to ask forgiveness. It's like putting one's head on the chopping block. And those who don't forgive are those who do the executing.
Blessings,
brian
Please register to post and access all features of our very popular forum. It is free and quick. Over $68,000 in prizes has already been given out to active posters on our forum. Additional giveaways are planned.
Detailed information about all U.S. cities, counties, and zip codes on our site: City-data.com.
Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
