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Spoke with an old friend who has been a Catholic priest for 20+ years now. Middle-of-the-road guy, serving in a middle-of-the-road parish
He does a lot (or tries to, at least) with teens in the parish. Obviously, he needs to follow all of the safe-environment protocols in the church of today
Still, he is frustrated in that each year, he watches dozens of kids get confirmed, and then, as though it was a graduation, he never sees them again.
He notes:
--these kids have *never* known a church that was not in scandal.
-- their parents, by and large, are no longer active church-goers
-- as an outreach, he now tries to attend as many events at the local high-school as he can: football, soccer, basketball, baseball games, concerts, plays, fund-raisers of all types
-- he realizes that the kids today no longer have a connection with the local church, and wants to encourage some kind of community among the teens, that’s based in the parish, not necessarily in the school community.
-- he has offered various kinds of teen activities, most grab little/no interest
Further, he notes:
-- on a *practical* basis, over the past ten to fifteen years, the church at least has begun to do all it humanly can to address the needs of those victims of abuse at the hands of priests: counseling, cash settlements, public apologies, safe-environment practices, etc. (Not that it can *ever* be enough for someone who has been abused, but at least steps are being taken….)
He’s become concerned about all the other folks in the pews who have never been touched / abused / mis-treated / molested by another priest, but who still are (his words) “legitimately scandalized” by all that has taken place.
He finds that in his “outreach” by doing nothing more than being present at very public events, that there are some whispering “….why is the priest always around the teens?”
He feels the age-old “damned if you do, damned if you don’t”.
His question:
How can he, as an individual priest, in an individual parish, begin to repair some of the damage that the people of God are feeling?
I thought I’d toss his question out here on this forum.
Thoughts?
Last edited by curiousdisciple; 10-18-2012 at 12:39 AM..
Reason: meta-data showing up in post
Well, he can gain respect by giving up the collar and admitting that the bible is full of lies, inconsistencies and evil like incest, rape, genocide and slavery. That would be a start.
What is his need to "bring sheep into the fold" anyway? Why does he lament people leaving the church... self validation?
“Ye are a chosen generation, a royal priesthood, an holy nation, a peculiar people; that ye should shew forth the praises of him who hath called you out of darkness into his marvelous light.” (I Peter 2:9)
He's laboring under a heavy burden, and it sounds as if he is taking some positive steps to restore some respect for right-acting priests. It is a tough role, and I cannot begin to imagine what I would do.
While pedophilia is the crime and sickness of many of these individuals. It is arrogance, secrecy, superiority and overweaning pride that is the problem with the institution of the church. Until the papacy gives up its smugness of being the last existing Renaissance monarchy and dissolves the Vatican State, until the bishops are reduced to humble servants living in reduced circumstances and until the cardinalate is driven from the Vatican like the eunuchs from the Forbidden City the church will continue to pretend to a specialness that it clearly does not have and the very idea of which is corrupting.
In the words of St. Francis of Assisi, "Preach the Gospel at all times, sometimes even using words."
As a respecter of the deep and rich faith of Catholics, I nevertheless think the church faces a huge problem in a lot of different arenas. The child abuse scandals have been going on for years now and new sordid details continue to be unearthed. While every faith has its share of miscreants and lunatics, the fundamental problem with the Catholics was the institutional indifference to the problem. The families were paid off, the offending priest received a swat on the wrist, and was often shipped off to another unsuspecting parish. I know how my faith would handle a similar issues -- The Bishop would pick up the phone and calls the police. In the event of other sexual misconduct, such as having an improper relationship with a consenting adult, the priest would simply be fired. Because while another priest can be found, integrity cannot be so easily proclaimed.
On an institutional level, the damage to the Catholic church is deep and lasting, and a publicity campaign does nothing to help. Instead, the only thing that will work is foundational and lasting reform. To me, the biggest issue is the celibacy requirement. Celibacy was not even a requirement of the priesthood until two Lateran councils decided the issue in the 12th Century. Paul in one of his letters to Timothy writes that a priest or a bishop should only have one wife -- and he wasn't writing in the figurative sense either. So removing the celibacy requirement not only does no damage to the theology of the church, but it also weeds out a huge number of candidates for the priesthood, but it also guarantees that a certain percentage of priests will find the burden intolerable to them, and seek outlets. So removing the celibacy requirement would be an enormous step.
CPG, you had me agreeing with you and applauding till your last paragraph, where you lost me. The thinking that celibacy is such a burden that priests "seek outlets" via sex abuse is just not true. If you look at other organizations --- Protestant churches, other religious organizations, the Boy Scouts, public schools, private schools, community organizations, etc. --- you'll find sex abuse, even where celibacy isn't an issue. The idea that "if we only allowed priests to marry, it would solve this problem," just doesn't hold water in light of the evidence.
To the OP, that sounds like a good priest. (Thankfully, he is a middle-of-the-road priest to begin with). He is concerned. Keep in mind that First Communion and Confirmation are often just shows of adherence to the Catholic culture. Nobody in the parish and the church did anything wrong. If he were to confront these people with a guilt trip, they'd be even less apt to go. It's just that people do other things instead of go to church. I have relatives in Europe who just had their daughters Confirmed, and I don't think they go to church that much.
On one particular Sunday, the situation was "too much" for me to go. A coworker lent me "Primal Fear." I watched it. It was a riveting movie, but it was also very disturbing. I'm sure it was fictional. However, the church does not have totally clean hands. I normally went to Mass on Sunday evenings, and was not motivated to go that evening.
If you look at other organizations --- Protestant churches, other religious organizations, the Boy Scouts, public schools, private schools, community organizations, etc. --- you'll find sex abuse, even where celibacy isn't an issue.
A big sex abuse scandal in the Seattle area was occurring at a Christian mega-church in the suburbs, and not at a Catholic church. I agree with your post, Mark S. The whole issue is power driven, more than it is sexually driven. That's what all the experts say on talk shows, news articles, and documentaries where this comes up.
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Whoa!! What happened to get all the meta-junk in that message??
