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Old 10-12-2016, 04:39 PM
 
Location: N. Fort Myers, FL
3,348 posts, read 1,622,837 times
Reputation: 102

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Quote:
Originally Posted by Age-enduring View Post
I've not heard of the codependency model...?
it grew out of AA, referring to the family and friends of alcoholics. But it is much more pervasive than that. If you found Christ as a codependent, you are just a codependent Christian. Don't wanna derail this thread any more, but seeking an understanding of codependence, even if you are not codependent, provides an explanation for lots of human behavior in developed societies. They are being called "empaths" now, a hideous label suggesting a "gift" imo. The State encourages codependence, of course; it is quite common.

 
Old 10-12-2016, 07:59 PM
 
Location: Arizona
28,956 posts, read 16,192,722 times
Reputation: 2295
Quote:
Originally Posted by Jerwade View Post
What age brackets are the parties to this foursome?

Quote:
Originally Posted by snugglegirl05 View Post
The female half of the couple was born in 1968.
The male half of the couple was born in 1960.
That only accounts for half of the foursome.

 
Old 10-12-2016, 08:03 PM
 
2,970 posts, read 2,757,156 times
Reputation: 3176
Quote:
Originally Posted by Jerwade View Post
That only accounts for half of the foursome.

I was born in 1968
My husband was born in 1971
 
Old 10-12-2016, 08:17 PM
 
Location: Arizona
28,956 posts, read 16,192,722 times
Reputation: 2295
Quote:
Originally Posted by snugglegirl05 View Post
The female half of the couple was born in 1968.
The male half of the couple was born in 1960.

The female half of the couple, who are just friends now, told me earlier
this week to not ask her male friend for his help regarding anything.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Jerwade View Post
That only accounts for half of the foursome.

Quote:
Originally Posted by snugglegirl05 View Post
I was born in 1968
My husband was born in 1971
I would say that it's up to the classic to decide what he wants, or not!


 
Old 10-12-2016, 08:24 PM
 
Location: Pacific 🌉 °N, 🌄°W
11,761 posts, read 7,212,849 times
Reputation: 7528
Quote:
Originally Posted by snugglegirl05 View Post
The female half of the couple, who are just friends now, told me earlier this week to not ask her male friend for his help regarding anything.
Why can't you just tell her to keep her nose out of you and your husbands relationship with the male friend?

You are adults right?
 
Old 10-12-2016, 09:11 PM
 
Location: N. Fort Myers, FL
3,348 posts, read 1,622,837 times
Reputation: 102
ya, nothing wrong with "honey, could you just mind your own business?"
but if you enlisted the male friend, it could be better accomplished by just...completely ignoring her when it is not her business. Can he not do this for some reason?
 
Old 10-13-2016, 10:12 AM
 
16,715 posts, read 19,317,186 times
Reputation: 41481
Quote:
Originally Posted by snugglegirl05 View Post
However, for grocery shopping, the male half of the couple takes him or us and picks him or us up. He also takes me husband to church.

The female half of the couple, who are just friends now, told me earlier this week to not ask her male friend for his help regarding anything.
Ohhhhhh...so you're using him, too.

Makes a lot more sense now why you feel you have to carry on this relationship.

Controlling, you say? Well, he does have a car, after all...
 
Old 10-13-2016, 11:06 AM
 
2,970 posts, read 2,757,156 times
Reputation: 3176
Quote:
Originally Posted by convextech View Post
Ohhhhhh...so you're using him, too.

Makes a lot more sense now why you feel you have to carry on this relationship.

Controlling, you say? Well, he does have a car, after all...
That is an agreement that my husband and the male friend came up with years ago before I met him.

He pays the male friend to take him grocery shopping.
 
Old 10-13-2016, 11:13 AM
 
16,715 posts, read 19,317,186 times
Reputation: 41481
Quote:
Originally Posted by snugglegirl05 View Post
That is an agreement that my husband and the male friend came up with years ago before I met him.

He pays the male friend to take him grocery shopping.
Doesn't change the dynamic, though.
 
Old 10-13-2016, 11:21 AM
 
2,970 posts, read 2,757,156 times
Reputation: 3176
Quote:
Originally Posted by convextech View Post
Doesn't change the dynamic, though.
so exactly would you suggest he do in this situation since we do not have a car nor can we afford a car?
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