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Status:
"Just livin' day by day"
(set 18 days ago)
Location: USA
3,166 posts, read 3,356,252 times
Reputation: 5382
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I always thought Christians were happy people until I got into a relationship with one. The man I used to be with claimed to be a Godly person accepting Jesus as his personal Savior. And believed Jesus died for our sins so we could have eternal life. When I learned he never drank, smoked, or did drugs, he seemed like the perfect catch. He was also still a virgin. So, I had thought I was dating this wonderful guy until his true colors began to shine. He was a wolf underneath sheep’s clothing.
I was in for a rude awakening. Underneath all his self-righteousness, he was an angry man and would explode at times smashing things to the point of breaking something or punching a whole in the wall.
His misogynistic attitude towards women reeks believing women are beneath men.
Even after our breakup, he couldn’t handle us just being friends like mature adults. He would still get angry with me. So unfortunately, I eventually had to go no-contact with him for my safety and well-being.
He lost me forever. And I have no doubt in my mind, he’ll find another woman and take out his anger at her. Before I blocked him for good, he has talked with the Pastor of his Church about his anger issues. Idk how many sessions but it’s definitely wasn’t working.
Unfortunately, anger seems to be his only coping mechanism when frustrated/stressed etc…. I tried suggesting options like exercise of some sort and he only had excuses not doing anything about it
Last edited by HappyFarm34; 05-25-2023 at 09:44 AM..
People are people first and Christians second. And people have sin natures and their individual personalities and characteristics. Just being a Christian does not automatically mean that you are going to be happy. I can't remember the last time I was happy. And it doesn't mean that you are going to be a nice person or an honest person. You haven't been conned until you've been conned by a Christian. Christians can be the nicest people you would ever want to meet and other Christians can be the worst people you would ever want to meet.
A person who has received Christ as Savior has been given a new nature but he still retains his old nature. And if he continues to live according to his old nature then the characteristics of his old nature will determine how he treats others.
I always thought Christians were happy people until I got into a relationship with one. The man I used to be with claimed to be a Godly person accepting Jesus as his personal Savior. And believed Jesus died for our sins so we could have eternal life. When I learned he never drank, smoked, or did drugs, he seemed like the perfect catch. He was also still a virgin. So, I had thought I was dating this wonderful guy until his true colors began to shine. He was a wolf underneath sheep’s clothing.
I was in for a rude awakening. Underneath all his self-righteousness, he was an angry man and would explode at times smashing things to the point of breaking something or punching a whole in the wall.
His misogynistic attitude towards women reeks believing women are beneath men.
Even after our breakup, he couldn’t handle us just being friends like mature adults. He would still get angry with me. So unfortunately, I eventually had to go no-contact with him for my safety and well-being.
He lost me forever. And I have no doubt in my mind, he’ll find another woman and take out his anger at her. Before I blocked him for good, he has talked with the Pastor of his Church about his anger issues. Idk how many sessions but it’s definitely wasn’t working.
Unfortunately, anger seems to be his only coping mechanism when frustrated/stressed etc…. I tried suggesting options like exercise of some sort and he only had excuses not doing anything about it
For the same reason that some atheists are jerks. Jerks are jerks.
I always thought Christians were happy people until I got into a relationship with one. The man I used to be with claimed to be a Godly person accepting Jesus as his personal Savior. And believed Jesus died for our sins so we could have eternal life. When I learned he never drank, smoked, or did drugs, he seemed like the perfect catch. He was also still a virgin. So, I had thought I was dating this wonderful guy until his true colors began to shine. He was a wolf underneath sheep’s clothing.
I was in for a rude awakening. Underneath all his self-righteousness, he was an angry man and would explode at times smashing things to the point of breaking something or punching a whole in the wall.
His misogynistic attitude towards women reeks believing women are beneath men.
Even after our breakup, he couldn’t handle us just being friends like mature adults. He would still get angry with me. So unfortunately, I eventually had to go no-contact with him for my safety and well-being.
He lost me forever. And I have no doubt in my mind, he’ll find another woman and take out his anger at her. Before I blocked him for good, he has talked with the Pastor of his Church about his anger issues. Idk how many sessions but it’s definitely wasn’t working.
Unfortunately, anger seems to be his only coping mechanism when frustrated/stressed etc…. I tried suggesting options like exercise of some sort and he only had excuses not doing anything about it
They never knew Christ,
nor He them
believing instead in the 'ol pile of s### under a white sheet trick actually works.
Without holiness, no one will see the face of God! Heb 12:14
I always thought Christians were happy people until I got into a relationship with one. The man I used to be with claimed to be a Godly person accepting Jesus as his personal Savior. And believed Jesus died for our sins so we could have eternal life. When I learned he never drank, smoked, or did drugs, he seemed like the perfect catch. He was also still a virgin. So, I had thought I was dating this wonderful guy until his true colors began to shine. He was a wolf underneath sheep’s clothing.
I was in for a rude awakening. Underneath all his self-righteousness, he was an angry man and would explode at times smashing things to the point of breaking something or punching a whole in the wall.
His misogynistic attitude towards women reeks believing women are beneath men.
Even after our breakup, he couldn’t handle us just being friends like mature adults. He would still get angry with me. So unfortunately, I eventually had to go no-contact with him for my safety and well-being.
He lost me forever. And I have no doubt in my mind, he’ll find another woman and take out his anger at her. Before I blocked him for good, he has talked with the Pastor of his Church about his anger issues. Idk how many sessions but it’s definitely wasn’t working.
Unfortunately, anger seems to be his only coping mechanism when frustrated/stressed etc…. I tried suggesting options like exercise of some sort and he only had excuses not doing anything about it
Like everyone else, Christians are subject to their own attitudes and demeanors.
I would think that Christians should at least have some joy from time to time just from abiding in Christ... unless they are not abiding in Christ.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Michael Way
People are people first and Christians second. And people have sin natures and their individual personalities and characteristics. Just being a Christian does not automatically mean that you are going to be happy. I can't remember the last time I was happy. And it doesn't mean that you are going to be a nice person or an honest person. You haven't been conned until you've been conned by a Christian. Christians can be the nicest people you would ever want to meet and other Christians can be the worst people you would ever want to meet.
A person who has received Christ as Savior has been given a new nature but he still retains his old nature. And if he continues to live according to his old nature then the characteristics of his old nature will determine how he treats others.
I always thought Christians were happy people until I got into a relationship with one. The man I used to be with claimed to be a Godly person accepting Jesus as his personal Savior. And believed Jesus died for our sins so we could have eternal life. When I learned he never drank, smoked, or did drugs, he seemed like the perfect catch. He was also still a virgin. So, I had thought I was dating this wonderful guy until his true colors began to shine. He was a wolf underneath sheep’s clothing.
I was in for a rude awakening. Underneath all his self-righteousness, he was an angry man and would explode at times smashing things to the point of breaking something or punching a whole in the wall.
His misogynistic attitude towards women reeks believing women are beneath men.
Even after our breakup, he couldn’t handle us just being friends like mature adults. He would still get angry with me. So unfortunately, I eventually had to go no-contact with him for my safety and well-being.
He lost me forever. And I have no doubt in my mind, he’ll find another woman and take out his anger at her. Before I blocked him for good, he has talked with the Pastor of his Church about his anger issues. Idk how many sessions but it’s definitely wasn’t working.
Unfortunately, anger seems to be his only coping mechanism when frustrated/stressed etc…. I tried suggesting options like exercise of some sort and he only had excuses not doing anything about it
I have known Christians that have told me how they struggle with rage.
The condition appears to have many causes, none of which are a valid excuse for abusing others.
Being a Christian is not easy work, particularly if we are determined to excorsise our " demons ".
They never knew Christ,
nor He them
believing instead in the 'ol pile of s### under a white sheet trick actually works.
Without holiness, no one will see the face of God! Heb 12:14
That's mighty judgmental. I knew a Roman Catholic priest who often exhibited a vicious streak. He was moved quickly from parish to parish until he was finally medically diagnosed with a thyroid issue. Once treated he normalized quite a bit.
Hypothyroidism is caused by an underperforming thyroid gland. The problem
progresses very slowly at first and may, therefore, have been in existence for a
long time, before detection. In fact, the psychiatric problems that stem from
this disorder may be the reason as to why the dysfunction is diagnosed in
the first place.
I always thought Christians were happy people until I got into a relationship with one. The man I used to be with claimed to be a Godly person accepting Jesus as his personal Savior. And believed Jesus died for our sins so we could have eternal life. When I learned he never drank, smoked, or did drugs, he seemed like the perfect catch. He was also still a virgin. So, I had thought I was dating this wonderful guy until his true colors began to shine. He was a wolf underneath sheep’s clothing.
I was in for a rude awakening. Underneath all his self-righteousness, he was an angry man and would explode at times smashing things to the point of breaking something or punching a whole in the wall.
His misogynistic attitude towards women reeks believing women are beneath men.
Even after our breakup, he couldn’t handle us just being friends like mature adults. He would still get angry with me. So unfortunately, I eventually had to go no-contact with him for my safety and well-being.
He lost me forever. And I have no doubt in my mind, he’ll find another woman and take out his anger at her. Before I blocked him for good, he has talked with the Pastor of his Church about his anger issues. Idk how many sessions but it’s definitely wasn’t working.
Unfortunately, anger seems to be his only coping mechanism when frustrated/stressed etc…. I tried suggesting options like exercise of some sort and he only had excuses not doing anything about it
Well I failed to dodge a similar bullet with my first wife. "Just marry a good Christian girl", they said, "and everything will work out". Too bad they never really defined "good Christian" beyond "accepted Jesus and goes to church" and as you suggest, doesn't have addiction issues. Too bad I never got any info about the real world and how people function in it from my upbringing or the church. We were married at 19, which in itself was a questionable decision.
In her case, she was diagnosed with paranoid schizophrenia and borderline personality disorder, but both she and the church were suspicious of mental health care. So prayer was deployed, to no avail. She didn't want to accept that she had disordered thinking or needed help with it, anyway.
Because of the borderline personality disorder, one of the features of which is usually what's call "rageaholism", extreme anger was in play with her also. I finally found the good sense to take the kids and leave her after I woke up in the middle of the night with her standing over me with a butcher knife.
Oh well! Fifteen years of my life I'll never get back. I had two children from that union, but one of them succumbed to schizoid personality disorder, a common pass-on from a schizophrenic parent. He died at age 30 -- indirectly because of his own disordered thinking.
So I learned the hard way that accepting Jesus and being devoted to church is no indication of what kind of life partner someone is going to be. Regardless of what you think that says, or doesn't say, about Christianity, or about that particular sort of church -- it is certainly not a useful input into mate selection. I mean, I suppose it's better than "marry a cocaine addict" or something, but it's certainly no guarantee of success.
In the Great Commission, Matthew 28:18-20, in part, make disciples, teaching them to obey everything I (Jesus) have commanded you.
When one repent , accepts Jesus as Lord and Savior, you must learn to walk in your new nature. It's a One Day at a Time. Vital to be in a church, small group to learn to live a different way of life.
A daily choice, first thing in the morning, read Scripture, a devotion. Ask for His will to be done that day. Have a struggle, addiction, something out of control, seek professional help, you may need to seek someone who may give you tough love, choice, do you want to change.
OP, wise lady. One doesn't have to accept unacceptable behavior !
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