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My grandfather passed away about 6 years ago. After he died, my mother, 4 uncles, and aunt didn't get my grandfather a headstone for his grave. But finally, they were able to put their money together and get my grandfather's headstone, but my uncle who is a pastor of his church would not contribute any money. He didn't give my family a reason, but my mother who was adamant about my grandfather getting his headstone felt that my uncle was being non christian about it for not contributing , especially after the fact that all of them get a monthly check for my grandfather's oil rights from the family's land down South.
My question is my uncle not doing the Christian things for helping pay for his father's, my grandfather headstone? This has really severed my uncle's and mom's relationship to the extent that my mother is no longer speaking to him.
An opinion...for what it's worth..
You don't know the reason your Uncle didn't contribute...
We are not to judge...
We are not to hold grudges...
This is all I know...don't go to bed mad at another...it's a sin.
Not saying your Uncle was right...but your mother is harming herself more than him by staying upset with him...says so in the bible.
As always, (or it seems like it anyway), I can't remember where it was...but it is there.
An opinion...for what it's worth..
You don't know the reason your Uncle didn't contribute...
We are not to judge...
We are not to hold grudges...
This is all I know...don't go to bed mad at another...it's a sin.
Not saying your Uncle was right...but your mother is harming herself more than him by staying upset with him...says so in the bible.
As always, (or it seems like it anyway), I can't remember where it was...but it is there.
Thank you, but family is family, and I was just wondering has anyone has any similar experience like this before. I dont know my uncle's reasons as well, and I can add my two cents to it, which I didn't because I don't feel like I can add my two cents since the headstone is for my grandfather and not my father..if that makes sense. But thanks for the input, and i tried to tell my mom just leave it alone, and she won't.
An opinion...for what it's worth..
You don't know the reason your Uncle didn't contribute...
We are not to judge...
We are not to hold grudges...
This is all I know...don't go to bed mad at another...it's a sin.
Not saying your Uncle was right...but your mother is harming herself more than him by staying upset with him...says so in the bible.
As always, (or it seems like it anyway), I can't remember where it was...but it is there.
I agree but it has become something that has bothered me, since I am forgiving and try to let things be between the person and their God,for what ever that is worth. But the bible does say if we need to stand corrected, then we go to the Word of God and do so lovingly as well.
you're asking a bunch of folks on an internet message board if someone is being a jerk for doing something they didn't give a reason for not doing?
We can't judge it w/out hearing what his reason for not contributing is.
I was thinking as well, but my uncle has not given a reason, just that he doesnt want to do it. Which makes no sense at all, unless it goes back to something that happened in child hood with him and my grandfather. But again, someone told me that if he's getting money from his father's oil rights, then why would it be so hard to contribute toward his dad's headstone? I couldn't come up with an answer besides, he just doesn't want to do it.
Thank you, but family is family, and I was just wondering has anyone has any similar experience like this before. I dont know my uncle's reasons as well, and I can add my two cents to it, which I didn't because I don't feel like I can add my two cents since the headstone is for my grandfather and not my father..if that makes sense. But thanks for the input, and i tried to tell my mom just leave it alone, and she won't.
I know your sadness.
My Dad and his sisters and brothers are all in a heated arguement...well, not arguement anymore...they haven't spoken to each other in years. This is the reason that I know the verse exists about not going to bed upset at another...I found it years ago and tried to show it to my Dad...He acknowledges that it is there...but....still...they don't talk.
I even tried the approach of asking him if he will be sorry for not speaking to them when they are gone...His answer? "I won't care." He even said he wouldn't go to their funerals.
So sad.
Thou shalt honor thy father and thy mother [that it may be well with thee and thou mayest live long upon the earth].
What does this mean?
We should fear and love God that we may not despise nor anger our parents and masters, but give them honor, serve, obey, and hold them in love and esteem.
I know your sadness.
My Dad and his sisters and brothers are all in a heated arguement...well, not arguement anymore...they haven't spoken to each other in years. This is the reason that I know the verse exists about not going to bed upset at another...I found it years ago and tried to show it to my Dad...He acknowledges that it is there...but....still...they don't talk.
I even tried the approach of asking him if he will be sorry for not speaking to them when they are gone...His answer? "I won't care." He even said he wouldn't go to their funerals.
So sad.
Wow, that's really sad, and i can see my family heading in that direction as well. All you can do is love your family and hope as christians we are being lights in their dark worlds. But it's so hard not to get caught up in that mess as well.
Wow, that's really sad, and i can see my family heading in that direction as well. All you can do is love your family and hope as christians we are being lights in their dark worlds. But it's so hard not to get caught up in that mess as well.
Yes, it's hard not to get caught up in it. I see my Aunts and Uncles all the time and the first thing they say to me is "Sherry, you know it is not you that I am upset with." I used to try and talk to them...to no avail. Now, I just smile and go on. I don't really speak of the incident with my parents, because I don't really know all the details myself...(and not sure I want to know)..I pray that God will give us peace...and maybe someday we will have those large family reunions which we always used to have...my Dad had 18 brothers and sisters! 12 of which are still alive. As of right now, I stay away from the family reunions that the rest of the family has because I don't want to upset my Dad and Mom. It truely is a sad thing and one in which it took me many years to accept. But I guess I have, in a way. It was such a loving family. I hope your family has better sense than mine! They are missing out on so much.
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