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You may consider Magnolia Greens, Waterforde, or Brunswick Forest. They are just across the river from downtown Wilmington which has plenty of restaurants, and pool halls. Each of these neighborhoods has impressive amenities within the neighborhood. Good luck!
I would recommend you contact one or two realtors prior to you trip, from the area around Wilmington to include Brunswick county.
Tell them what you are looking for and they should be able to help you. Additionally, you can arrange some time with them, and they can take you around to prospective areas and homes. Additionally, they and can provide you with extremely valuable insight that you cannot gain riding around by yourself.
Depending on finances and how metropolitan you want to go, I would recommend researching as far north as New Bern. New Bern is a popular area for retirees and has much of what you listed as well.
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