[Dave75]

Hello all, I'm a long time "lurker", but joined today to possibly get some advice.

I currently live in Florida (Orlando metro area), and have an opportunity for a promotion with my job to transfer to NJ or remain here. Both my wife and I are originally from CT, but have been living here for the past 10 years. We have two small children in elementary school. I make mid 60's in salary and my wife is a SAHM. If I take this job in NJ, I could expect anywhere from 5 to 10k more (I'm not sure yet). If I stay here, I would get 5k more.

We are happy with where we are now, and content with the school our children attend (charter). I wonder though, if we would be happier back home or if we are holding on to some childhood nostalgia about moving back.

My main concern though is money. With what I make now living here we are able to live in a older home with a nice yard, in a quiet, safe, established neighborhood surrounded by mature trees (what we love). After paying our bills and saving each month, we still have money to go out and do things as a family. We vacation every year up north and travel for weekend getaways often around FL.

I am not sure if I would pay CT income tax, NJ, or both? How much would I expect to pay, and would get any back at the end of the year? I would be working in the Rutherford area and would like to still live in CT, so what towns would be options for that kind of commute? Would there be tolls and how much? I should also mention that there would be an option to work remotely from home 2 to possibly 3 days per week.

Does this seem like a realistic option with what my salary is, and supporting a wife and 2 kids? Or would we be compromising some of our quality of life.... or perhaps increasing it?

I should also mention, we are renters and would continue to rent in CT as well.

[kidyankee764]

The NJ/CT area is a lot more expensive than Orlando as you know. I'm not sure that a total of 5k more would be sufficient to maintain your current quality of life. That being said, if you want to move back to the Northeast, it's a no brainer.

I wouldn't suggest you make the move to CT over NJ. The towns in CT closest to NJ (Greenwich, Stamford, Darien, New Canaan, Wilton) are prohibitively expensive. Also, you'd have to look at wear and tear on your car, gas, and tolls (which can run you over 200 a month). NJ has many nice towns that would offer you a much easier commute, but it too is very expensive.

If you're happy with where you are now and you won't be seeing a significant raise, why do you want to leave?

[Stylo]

I'm afraid it's not a very good idea to commute from CT to Rutherford. You are much, much, much better off just living in NJ. There are plenty of nice towns within a short commute of that area. There's no reason to live in CT in your scenario, especially if you're renting and property taxes don't matter. There are some nice suburbs in NJ that have a similar feel to many CT towns.

The only somewhat affordable town in CT where you'll get a decent amount of home for the money "commutable" to that area is Danbury. That is a 90 minute drive WITHOUT traffic.

Greenwich is the closest and that's 40 miles, but there's so much AWFUL traffic between there and Rutherford that you could be looking at a very, very long and stressful commute. That, and Greenwich is one of the wealthiest and most expensive towns in the country, and you would probably get a small condo for what you're paying for a nice house in FL.

If your main concern is money, the tri-state area might not be for you. I would hope you're getting at least a 20% pay increase and are willing to live a little more modestly. Otherwise, you may want to stay in FL. It's a lot more expensive here.

If you really want to be in the NE, I would look at towns east of Rutherford.

[Dave75]

Thanks for the replies thus far.

A couple of reasons we are even thinking about moving is we have much of our family in CT as well as many friends.

Even though I mentioned we were content with the school our children are in, I think they would probably be better off in a traditional public school up there. Again, that's if we can afford to live in a nice town where they can attend those schools. I also wonder if they would be better off up there for higher education and eventually settling down with their own careers and families...

Also, we both miss the 4 seasons, however by no means would that be one of the determining factors. That would just be more like a bonus.

We don't know anyone in NJ and honestly not that familiar with it at all. I should probably post in that forum also, but does anyone here know of any towns by the Rutherford area worth looking at with my salary?

[Stylo]

As the area is the biggest and, arguably, the wealthiest metro area in the US, yes, there will be more opportunities for your children growing up as they settle into adulthood.

You'll probably have to live a good 45 minutes out to afford a family-sized place with decent schools in NJ. Definitely post in that forum.

[bobtn]

Dave75, I'd suggest using salary.com and like sites income relocation index to gauge the difference in Quality of Life due to the Cost of Living differences. I'd also write a list after that of pros and cons. All moves need to be gauged, as much as possible, from a purely rational standpoint. That's hard to do, when families are involved, but doing so lets one decide things in a better, longer-term manner.

In any event, best of luck on whatever decision you make.

[DanielSimpsonDay]

Cost of living will bury you. The schools will be much better and there will be more career opportunities in NJ, but you will take bath financially with the increase that you have been offered.

[JayCT]

From a strictly financial standpoint, the move would not make sense. I agree with the others that commuting from Connecticut to Rutherford does not make sense and that you should live in New Jersey so your commute is not insane. Rutherford is located right outside New York and the cost of living particularly for housing is going to be a lot higher. Your raise would not ocmpensate for that increase.

Some towns I know near Rutherford that are nice are Nutley, Clifton and Bloomfield. You can post on the New Jersey Board for names of other towns to look into.

That said no one can tell you how important it is to live near family. I wish I was able to live closer to family when our kids were young but we ended up being an hour away which is not too bad. If you are willing to accept a somewhat lower standard of living in NJ (older, smaller house, less deposable income, etc.) then you may want to consider it. Good luck, Jay

[bobtn]

If I recall correctly, Florida is one of 8 income tax free states, so right off the bat, short of moving amongst the 8, your costs go up. Property Taxes and Mortgage/Rent are also likely higher in either Ct or NJ. Gas is high in Ct, not sure about NJ. Again, I'd google cost of living relocation index, and look for one that takes family size into account. I definitely would not advise a NJ-CT commute; b/w gas and car maintenance expenses due to massive mileage, and wearing out cars fast, that would be a big economic obstacle.

You may want to consider the prospect of going to 2 incomes, even if one is part-time, as on one income, I doubt the move is manageable w/o a drastic lifestyle difference.

[Tetto]

I'll echo what others have already said, I would be very careful making that move for that little $$. I understand the pull of family and friends, but you're only a two hour plane ride away. Personally, I would need 15-20k to uproot my family and move to one of the highest cost areas of the country. On the plus side, you live in an area of the country where you're family and friends would probably love to come down and visit. Good luck.