[browneyedgirl-tcw]

We moved to Farmington, CT in May from Phoenix, Arizona. We have a daughter who is a Senior and transferred to Farmington High School. Prior to attending Farmington High School, she went to a school in Phoenix with a very diverse student body of about 3000 kids. Her close friends ranged from African American to White to Asian, Hispanic and everything in between. She has mentioned to us that she notices that kids for the most part kind of "stay with their own" (as crazy as that sounds in this day and age of global interaction). I have also seen a Farmington town sign which was spray painted over to read "Farmington-White people only",which let's me know that unfortunately, ignorance is everywhere-although I am certain that these people are in the minority (always hoping to escape ignorance, as we embrace and celebrate differences and have always encouraged our children to do the same). I do find that people in Farmington seem to be very friendly and welcoming overall. Is this a trend with FHS and if so why. This is just based on her observation of the differences that she sees.

[NewJeffCT]

I used to live nearby in Avon and never found that attitude at all - my daughters best friends in her school were two Indian girls, a Mexican girl, a Chinese girl and two Jewish girls (white). Not to mention the adopted girl from across the street who was from China, but whose adoptive parents were Jewish. And, her OM team that made the world finals was similarly diverse - the Mexican girl and one of her Indian girl friends were on the team, with a boy of Korean descent and a white boy and a white girl. They all got along great.

Farmington High School itself is "only" about 75% white, with 12% or so Asian, and the remainder split between African American and Hispanic. So, for a relatively wealthy suburb in Connecticut, Farmington is pretty diverse. Avon is less diverse than Farmington as well.

[browneyedgirl-tcw]

Thanks for that information NewJeffCT. I think she just needs to give it a little more time. She has so much to adjust to in her last year of high school with this move and the laundry list of Senior todo's that never seem to end (with SAT's, college apps, essays, etc). Needless to say, it is a lot of pressure and on top of that, she had to leave her close friends behind.

[NewJeffCT]

Sorry to hear she's having trouble, but it's got to be tough for her moving to a new school as a senior. Many kids will have long established friendships by that time, so it's hard to break into their circles.

[JayCT]

I can't speak for Farmington but here in Glastonbury, my kids had a wide range of friends of different ethnic backgrounds too. One child's best friend until they moved was from central America. Others were an adopted Asian, Israeli and a bi-racial child. Still a majority were white. What is funny is that I had noted the diversity to DW once and she asked me what the heck I was talking about. When I went through the list of friends she was shocked because she never even thought of any of them as having different ethnicity. Neither did I until questions like this were raised here in the past. Jay

[browneyedgirl-tcw]

Diversity is an important issue, because, we live in a world that is extremely diverse and people have to be able to collaborate on a more global scale and be comfortable interacting with people who may not necessarily share views that are similar to their own. It is also important to be able to empathize with others. The reason that I asked the question is because my daughter has found that unlike the previous school that she attended, it seems to be an issue-or at least that is her perception of it. Hoping not to debate whether it matters or not, just wanted to get a clearer line of sight into the issue, as my family and I are new to the area.

[FutureTown]

My background is somewhat like your daughter's. Except, instead of coming in as a senior in high school, I came around 7th grade to Newtown. Newtown, like Farmington doesn't have the diversity you would expect in Phoenix or Los Angeles (Where I lived before CT). They're both affluent towns and both have excellent schools even when compared to other amazing schools littered in this state.

However, I have NEVER witnessed such things like "Newtown - Only White People". In fact, no one really sees color and while student occasionally made fun of my background in jest, teachers who overheard would often come to protect me and punish the students. If I ever felt bullied, I always knew the administration wouldn't tolerate it one bit. In my entire life at Newtown High School, I did not feel unwelcome at all. And trust me, it definitely was a culture shock over here. I've never witnessed how affluency affects the children of your local school, lol! I did have a tough time adjusting in Middle school, but I turned out quite alright.

Since most people know each other through community, neighborhoods, elemantary schools, extracirricular activities, I felt alone in Newtown since everyone already knew each other except me. That took a while to adjust, and I definitely floated around groups, but, it made for an interesting experience in hindsight. In high school, I hung out with the group that would focus on their academics and were very well behaved. Nothing racist or unaccepting. If people didn't like me, it's cause of something I did or say, not cause of my background or ethnicity. But yes, people will hang out with certain kinds (AKA "cliques") usually due to some sort of mutual benefit. You'll notice in alotta high schools or colleges where minorities hang out within themselves and that's probably because it's tough to express themselves to someone who is not of their background. I've done this myself, and it's quite alright. What is not okay is if someone comes their way and they are rude due to their background. That is outright terrible. At the least, classmates should be kind to each other. How ideal, huh?

It's sad to see your daughter witnessing all of this at FHS. I know a couple people from Farmington, and it's not the town or high school to give off that vibe. I suggest being patient and see if anything turns. Your daughter is already at a disadvantage changing schools so late and coming from the other side of U.S not to mention as a senior. It's going to be a rough year, but it certainly is possible! I wish you luck! =)

[FutureTown]

Also, if no one has said it yet...Welcome to Connecticut, Welcome to New England! =)

[basehead617]

I'm certain the 'white people only' graffiti was done tongue-in-cheek and as a dig at the town's image, NOT by a racist.

[Calvin77]

Where is that graffiti? I've never seen that. Lived in Farmington for years.

I've never really seen racism in town either. I'm not saying it doesn't exist and there are definitely a few bad apples in every group, but I haven't seen it. I see the kids all playing together.

I grew up in a lily white CT town. We had 2 black kids in our school and maybe a handful of Asians, and that was it. Even then I never saw racism. Why? Because these kids were just like all my white peers. They were no different at all. They came from middle class educated families, wore the same clothes, spoke the same way.

I never understood racism beyond the concept until I moved to Springfield MA.

I bet it's just culture shock for your daughter. I hope things get better for her.