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My wife & I reside in the Phoenix, AZ metro area. We've been here nearly 3 years--since graduate school--and are generally pretty happy with our choice of locales. We're in our late-20's-early 30's, and have strong educational backgrounds (I have an MS in Computer Science, and she is an MD/PhD). After practicing clinical medicine for a bit, my wife received an offer for an academic research position--which she feels is her true calling--at the University of Connecticut.
We flew in for a brief visit in February to meet my wife's potential colleagues in Farmington. From the very moment we met them, we were absolutely shocked at the negativity virtually all of them conveyed. Comments such as 'stay right where you are..this state is in shambles' were pretty much the norm. A few of them were from my wife's alma mater, and essentially told us that relocating to CT was the worst mistake they've ever made, and to either head to Boston or avoid the northeast entirely.
That said, we decided to spend a week in CT when the weather would be warmer and the people presumably less miserable. We stayed at the Hilton Garden Inn (Glastonbury), which was nice enough. However, that was about the high point of the trip. I don't even know where to begin to describe how disappointed we were.
Let's start with the roads! I don't know how you all do it--CT roads are a total war zone! Your 84 freeway is THE most dangerous freeway I have ever driven on. I can't tell you how many times we were blatantly cut off or came within inches of being hit. It is completely reprehensible that there is zero enforcement out there. Virtually every CT driver is downright reckless OR a complete slow-poke. Oh, and why does nearly everyone sit in the passing lane and refuse to budge? Why do people there literally fight for a parking space that saves them an perhaps 10 feet of walking? The roads/lack of civility alone were a deal-breaker.
We were nearly as appalled by the condition of the houses we looked at. Some of them literally needed to be torn down. Outdated heating (oil?!), most had zero cooling (the humidity is disgusting), and kitchens that were circa 1960. I'd even suspect many had foundation/structural issues. Yet these were going for $400,000 or more. I'm fully aware that CT and AZ are polar opposites, but for nearly half a million dollars, to not get a home with modern amenities is absurd!
I also have to admit I was not aware of the degree to which CT's economy is suffering. Yes, I was aware of the tremendous tax burden that comes with living there, but I assumed that a location between New York and Boston would result in a highly robust economy. Hence, our disappointment when my wife's offer was a mere 10% above what she would make in Arizona. Needless to say, that would be equivalent to taking a 40-50% pay cut, at minimum. Not going to happen. I also understand from conversations with UConn MD's and researchers that all the top talent (Yale, etc) in the state does not stay, and that CT's appeal to young, well educated people in the sciences has become virtually nil. Pretty tragic, as we were looking forward to changing seasons and that storybook white christmas, but for all of the factors above, CT is out for us.
No, I'm not positing this for the sole purpose of complaining/bashing your state. I'm interested in your input as to whether we're making a hasty decision, or if there's something appealing about the state that we simply didn't see. We are looking into Boston, as well..as that's where many of the people we met in Farmington told us to direct our attention. Moreover, I understand there are a ton of tech companies in the Boston metro, so I could easily find a position. Thank you for reading.
I chose to put roots down in CT after living in the southwest (NM) and southeast. New England is different- you view heating oil as "outdated" but it is just another fuel source here. Really not a big deal. You are used to new builds so the housing stock here looks ancient. I get it (I came to CT after Florida- same deal). It seems like you are comparing CT to AZ, a place you are happy living. If you keep doing that, no other locale will ever match up. It is the wrong mindset when contemplating cross country moves and you'll never be content. Not all places are for everyone and it's fine to take a hard pass on CT. Just be honest with yourself if you are truly giving other locales a fair shot.Boston will have the same heating oil, same old housing stock, with even more insane drivers so you either need to adjust expectations or accept the fact that you aren't cut out for the northeast.
FWIW, I am well educated and in my 30s. My colleagues, friends, etc. don't weep in our coffee about the doomsday scenario you are painting. The majority of people I know are happy, with exception to the cranky crowd on this message board
We don't have kids, and quite frankly have no desire whatsoever to ever have them. So I fail to see why schools would be of any relevance here. Just to indulge you, we live in Scottsdale. You might want to check out the ratings for our public school system (hint: they're quite excellent).
Obviously AZ is hot--quite possibly the hottest place in the country. But we have a small fraction of the humidity that you do, and it is unheard of for even the shabbiest of homes to lack a/c.
Why take such an antagonistic tone on a message board, though?
Quote:
Originally Posted by basehead617
Enjoy your 120 degree weather and the worst schools in the nation!
Corruption and lack of leadership / bad governance is why CT isn't able to attract people and businesses. Suburban office parks are a thing of the past and large city living is where businesses like GE are heading because of its high number of young people and new workers.
I have to say I find your post to be questionable at best. Where were you looking at $400,000 homes and found them to have no updates. In the Hartford area it should not be hard to find an updated home in that range. I can think of a number in Glastonbury and the stunning Farmington River Valley that are updated at that price. Of course homes here are older, we are one of the oldest parts of the country and we do not have the sprawl that Arizona has. We don't keep building out and letting our older neighborhoods die like there. Did you look at homes in towns like Farmington, Simsbury, Avon or Burlington? These are beautiful towns that would have nice updated homes in your price range.
I will agree that I-84 is not a great road to drive on but our highways are older and were built a long time ago. Because the northeast is older our roads are not laid out in a monotonous grid pattern and our highways do not plow through any neighborhood. I am guessing that you drove from Glastonbury to Farmington right through Hartford which is the worst section of the highway. I do wonder why you had a hotel in Glastonbury but the job is on the other side of the city in Farmington. There are many nice hotels in or near Farmington.
As for the coworkers you talked to, since you were likely at UConn Medical and there are layoffs hanging over them, the attitudes there are likely not good.
You mention also considering Boston. Wait until you see what $400,000 buys you there. And if you think I-84 is bad just wait until you see traffic on Boston roads and what Massachusetts drivers are like. Anyway I will say I am sorry you did not enjoy your visit here. I can assure you this is not common. Hartford is a great area to live. It just sounds that you only saw the worst and did not see much of the best. I assure there is a lot more that is good than you apparently saw. Jay
We don't have kids, and quite frankly have no desire whatsoever to ever have them. So I fail to see why schools would be of any relevance here. Just to indulge you, we live in Scottsdale. You might want to check out the ratings for our public school system (hint: they're quite excellent).
Obviously AZ is hot--quite possibly the hottest place in the country. But we have a small fraction of the humidity that you do, and it is unheard of for even the shabbiest of homes to lack a/c.
Why take such an antagonistic tone on a message board, though?
I'm in my mid 30s and married with a child. Having been here 10+ years I think this is is a wonderful place to raise a family and there is spectacular nature, great food, decent culture. I was less than amused as a mid 20 something when I first arrived, coming here from a vibrant metro area, but I know that our quality of life here as a family that loves the outdoors is way better than it would have been if we had stayed in our more urban location.
I think that if you are not planning on having children and are looking for an active social scene with your peers, there are better locations for you. Try Boston or Raleigh or maybe Philly.
The housing/HVAC situation here is very typical for all of the northeast though so if you do end up in Boston it will be more of the same.
After practicing clinical medicine for a bit, my wife received an offer for an academic research position--which she feels is her true calling--at the University of Connecticut.
Jobs in academia are increasingly rare and competitive. Most folks looking for careers in academia don't end up in their "dream" locations; they end up having to make compromises in location and/or the university where they find a job.
Regarding the comments your wife received from her potential colleagues: there is ALWAYS an element of personal bias in such advice. I wonder how much that influences the "advice" you received from the people your wife would be working with -- how many of them wish that THEY could move to Boston, or work at a different university? How much of their expressed dissatisfaction has nothing at all to do with Connecticut (the state) and instead more to do with the program, the university, or their own personal view of where they thought they'd be at this state in their lives? And, how does that relate to how satisfied your wife might be in her new career? Those are perhaps some questions you and your wife need to sort out -- if the U of Conn. is truly a messed up place to work, then that is definitely something to consider.
That's not to say that your wife should or should not accept the position. Only you and your wife can weigh the balance of what she is doing now and where, over doing something else in another location, given what she found out from current employees. Obviously, your wife should do her due diligence about the program/department and also decide if the position might lead to other things, or if waiting for a different offer is better.
There is no right or wrong decision when faced with a choice like this, only different ones. And, most career decisions can be reversed if one makes a mistake. I have found that my initial gut reaction to major changes is sometimes spot on (years later, I say, thank goodness I didn't do that) but more than once my initial gut reaction has proven to be totally wrong (years later, I say, thank goodness I didn't listen to what other people were telling me!") .
I guess what I am trying to say is that your wife and you should make an informed decision, and then try not to have regrets.
Good luck!
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