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Old 08-27-2015, 06:45 PM
 
Location: Warren, OH
2,744 posts, read 4,234,676 times
Reputation: 6503

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Quote:
Originally Posted by middle-aged mom View Post
I lost track of the number of girls/women I knew that had brothers who copped a feel, spied on them in the bathroom had their underwear go missing and so on.


Studies over the past 60+ years have concluded:

50% of married men cheated in 1953.

72% of married men cheated in 1991.

25% of married men cheated in 2004.

All studies are based upon samplings of the population and depend on the respondents disclosure.
Regardless of which study was/is closer to the truth, a heck of a lot of married men cheat and so do married women.

AM had 37 million members at peak. Reportedly only 3 zip codes in the US did not have at least one AM member. Most had hundreds. Most interestingly, most registered users are male.

Should all seek help?
Not sure where these stats come from, but honestly, "brothers who cop a feel" are not the norm. Not only have I "not lost count" - I have no count. Zero.

I think if you have "copped a feel" on your sister - YES you do need help.

Looking at porn? I don't think that's the worst thing in the world - but it's between a couple. Some couples enjoy it together. Most do not. Looking at porn or having one extramarital affair is not the same thing as fondling your sister.

I blame that whole hypocritical religion.

Duggar needs more than "sexual healing". He needs deprogramming from that cult religion. And non faith based psychotherapy. ALL of those children were and continue to be abuse victims.
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Old 08-27-2015, 06:51 PM
 
2,441 posts, read 2,608,562 times
Reputation: 4644
Quote:
Originally Posted by yukon View Post
This thread is about Josh Duggar. I'm able to say that he needs help because even he admits he needs help. That's why he voluntarily checked into rehab.

Unfortunately he checked into a rehab that doesn't use licensed counselors. It's just a longer version of the work your butt off /hope God sweats it out of you 'rehab' he had last time.

Josh Duggar

The guy needs professional help. And there ARE Christian counselors out there. THAT's what he needs. And so does Anna. But neither of them will get real help. And that's sad.
It doesn't need to use counselors, because there are no counseling sessions. They're also forbidden to talk about why they're there.
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Old 08-27-2015, 06:55 PM
 
2,441 posts, read 2,608,562 times
Reputation: 4644
Quote:
Originally Posted by middle-aged mom View Post
I lost track of the number of girls/women I knew that had brothers who copped a feel, spied on them in the bathroom had their underwear go missing and so on.


Studies over the past 60+ years have concluded:

50% of married men cheated in 1953.

72% of married men cheated in 1991.

25% of married men cheated in 2004.

All studies are based upon samplings of the population and depend on the respondents disclosure.
Regardless of which study was/is closer to the truth, a heck of a lot of married men cheat and so do married women.

AM had 37 million members at peak. Reportedly only 3 zip codes in the US did not have at least one AM member. Most had hundreds. Most interestingly, most registered users are male.

Should all seek help?
There were 12,000 real female Ashley Madison users, vs 30 million or so real male users.

And not a single one of my friends has ever been abused by a brother. One was by a cousin.
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Old 08-27-2015, 06:55 PM
 
Location: Chesapeake Bay
6,046 posts, read 4,817,498 times
Reputation: 3544
Quote:
Originally Posted by Uncle Bully View Post
He would have gone to jail, he would have been beaten and violently raped, and many would feel that would have been what he deserved. So yeah things might have been a little bit different for him!
How long ago was it when that happen to you?

Could be that some things have changed since then.
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Old 08-27-2015, 10:12 PM
 
Location: Tucson for awhile longer
8,869 posts, read 16,319,598 times
Reputation: 29240
News flash to the Duggars and their fans: the American Psychiatric Association doesn't recognize "porn addiction" as a disorder. In the opinion of the nation's mental health professionals, there is no credible research arising from multiple studies showing any "characteristically addictive brain activity while watching pornography," even by people who categorize themselves as "problematic porn viewers."

Sex rehabs are basically places for the embarrassed to go and hide when their illicit activities catch up with them. Like when Michael Douglas was caught in the throes of passion with his wife's best friend. There's no indication most of these people are any different when they come out, except that they and their "counselors" will claim that they've been "saved." Christian-based rehabs — like the Illinois one Duggar reportedly enrolled in at the cost of $7,500 a month — basically teach that the "addict" is a person in the thrall of the devil and only when Beelzebub has been cast out of them will they emerge as people with no sexual desires other than the godly kind that gets their wives pregnant.

So when Josh is "cured" he will no longer want to fantasize about having affairs, will not seek out prostitutes to engage in rough sex, and will not be sticking his hands on any sleeping little girls. He will, however, be free to go about his business chastising others for their sexual freedom and encouraging his fellow Fundamentalists to discriminate against homosexuals and other sexual minorities.

But now for the good news. According to Josh's brother-in-law, his wife will be waiting for him because she firmly believes that her duty is to be submissive to her husband no matter what the devil made him do.

Porn Rehab Is Not a Thing - The Daily Beast

Josh Duggar is going to rehab for porn addiction. Is that a real thing?
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Old 08-27-2015, 11:03 PM
 
Location: Phoenix, AZ
3,515 posts, read 3,687,968 times
Reputation: 6403
Quote:
Originally Posted by Jukesgrrl View Post
News flash to the Duggars and their fans: the American Psychiatric Association doesn't recognize "porn addiction" as a disorder. In the opinion of the nation's mental health professionals, there is no credible research arising from multiple studies showing any "characteristically addictive brain activity while watching pornography," even by people who categorize themselves as "problematic porn viewers."

Sex rehabs are basically places for the embarrassed to go and hide when their illicit activities catch up with them. Like when Michael Douglas was caught in the throes of passion with his wife's best friend. There's no indication most of these people are any different when they come out, except that they and their "counselors" will claim that they've been "saved." Christian-based rehabs — like the Illinois one Duggar reportedly enrolled in at the cost of $7,500 a month — basically teach that the "addict" is a person in the thrall of the devil and only when Beelzebub has been cast out of them will they emerge as people with no sexual desires other than the godly kind that gets their wives pregnant.

So when Josh is "cured" he will no longer want to fantasize about having affairs, will not seek out prostitutes to engage in rough sex, and will not be sticking his hands on any sleeping little girls. He will, however, be free to go about his business chastising others for their sexual freedom and encouraging his fellow Fundamentalists to discriminate against homosexuals and other sexual minorities.

But now for the good news. According to Josh's brother-in-law, his wife will be waiting for him because she firmly believes that her duty is to be submissive to her husband no matter what the devil made him do.

Porn Rehab Is Not a Thing - The Daily Beast

Josh Duggar is going to rehab for porn addiction. Is that a real thing?


The APA used to recognize homosexuality as a mental disorder too though, as more evidence is developed, views change and its only over the past 20 years that there has been this massive increase in easy availability of sexual content, adult dating sites and more online. It hasn't been but about a decade since these various porn tube type sites appeared, making finding porn easier than ever before with endless options available right at your fingertips, that is a whole world apart from browing usenet groups with a 14.4k modem. I think anything in excess can be harmful and there's definitely a multitude of anecdotal reports as well as as some limited studies which suggest that excessive viewing of pornography can have long-lasting effects in those who have obsessive-compulsive mindsets to start with.

Quote:

But the kind of definitive research that could explain what happens to the brain while watching porn simply hasn’t been done, says Dr. Richard Krueger, associate clinical professor of psychiatry at Columbia University’s college of physicians and surgeons. Kruger helped revise the sexual disorders section of the latest edition of the psychiatric bible, the Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders, which doesn’t include sex or porn addiction due to lack of academic evidence that they exist. “The whole notion of what goes on in someone’s brain when they’re sexually excited is just starting to be evaluated,” he says.
Quote:
He has little doubt porn addiction is real and will eventually garner enough attention to be recognized as a mental illness. But he’s skeptical it has the kind of universal neurological effects that some suggest. Other behaviours such as drinking alcohol or gambling are addictive to only a small minority of the people who engage in them—between one and 10 per cent, Krueger says. “I would argue for the same sort of hit rate with exposure to Internet pornography, that most people would do it and it won’t become a problem.”
Quote:

Dr. Valerie Voon from Cambridge University found, “Pornography triggers brain activity in people with compulsive sexual behavior – known commonly as sex addiction – similar to that triggered by drugs in the brains of drug addicts.” The authors did caution that this does not mean that pornography itself is addictive, but that it highlights regions of the brain similar to those with drug addictions. The authors suggest that 1 in 25 or 4% of the population may be dealing with sexual addiction.
https://www.psychologytoday.com/blog...addiction-real




Therapists in recent years have reported a large increase in those seeking treatment for sex addiction, to the point where the quest for sex, whether porn, adult dating sites or other such issues completely overwhelms their lives, similar to alcoholism or a drug addiction. They end up neglecting their job, their family, their hobbies, all in the quest for sexual gratification.



I don't think porn by itself is bad, much like I don't think that gambling or alcohol in moderation are necessarily bad, but I do think that as with alcohol and gambling you have those who for whatever reason, are predisposed to not being able to simply view porn in moderation and compulsively let it and the quest for more sexual stimulus take over their lives. Alcoholism has run rampant through my family, for that reason I have largely kept my distance from alcohol, I just never want to wind up in that downwards spiral of lost control that comes with addiction, I've seen friends struggle with addiction to painkillers as well as alcoholism and it never pretty, I have no difficulty believing that there are those who also struggle with sex addiction, whether its because of OCD issues or whatever the case might be.







Quote:


So when Josh is "cured" he will no longer want to fantasize about having affairs, will not seek out prostitutes to engage in rough sex, and will not be sticking his hands on any sleeping little girls. He will, however, be free to go about his business chastising others for their sexual freedom and encouraging his fellow Fundamentalists to discriminate against homosexuals and other sexual minorities.
You're assuming that there is a cure, that you can just talk and medicate your way towards a resolution. We can't cure pedophiles worth a damn, and recent studies suggest a possible genetic link in some cases, meaning some are just born with a tendency towards various forms of sexual deviancy such as pedophilia. This is one possible explanation for the ridiculously high recidivism rate among pedophiles.

Last edited by Juram; 08-27-2015 at 11:20 PM..
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Old 08-28-2015, 12:05 AM
 
Location: San Antonio
4,468 posts, read 10,615,820 times
Reputation: 4244
Quote:
Originally Posted by WildColonialGirl View Post
It doesn't need to use counselors, because there are no counseling sessions. They're also forbidden to talk about why they're there.
Which is why it won't change a damn thing for him.

Other than make him figure out how not to get caught next time.
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Old 08-28-2015, 03:43 AM
 
125 posts, read 159,150 times
Reputation: 169
When it comes to "sexual immorality," it's funny how the biggest complainers are often the worst offenders.

Last edited by DRS1989; 08-28-2015 at 03:55 AM..
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Old 08-28-2015, 04:25 AM
 
Location: Tucson for awhile longer
8,869 posts, read 16,319,598 times
Reputation: 29240
Quote:
Originally Posted by Juram View Post
... You're assuming that there is a cure, that you can just talk and medicate your way towards a resolution. We can't cure pedophiles worth a damn, and recent studies suggest a possible genetic link in some cases, meaning some are just born with a tendency towards various forms of sexual deviancy such as pedophilia. This is one possible explanation for the ridiculously high recidivism rate among pedophiles.
I'm not "assuming" any such thing. I was being sarcastic. That's why I put the word in quotation marks. I don't think you can be cured of a "addiction" that is not an addiction. Are many people overly dependent on pornography? Yes. Is constantly viewing porn giving many people (especially young men) a distorted idea human sexuality? No doubt. Is the over-reliance on viewing porn because real relationships are too hard causing the failure of many relationships? Probably. I would advocate all of those people seeking therapy.

But the idea that experiencing sexual desire is evil and you are a porn addict if you have a subscription to Playboy and occasionally view a blue movie is the notion many of these faith-based "rehab facilities" are selling. The religious sect the Duggars belong to not only distorts the experience of sexuality, it represses women and advocates prejudice against sexual minorities. That's what people need help with. Not a made-up disease.

You quote Dr. Valerie Voon from Cambridge University as saying “Pornography triggers brain activity in people with compulsive sexual behavior – known commonly as sex addiction – similar to that triggered by drugs in the brains of drug addicts.” Several serious studies at American universities such as Harvard and UCLA have tried to see this type of activity in the brains of people who say they are porn addicts. But they have failed in replicating the results Dr. Voon says she found. That's the primary reason the APA does not list porn addiction as a disorder in the DSM (Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders).
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Old 08-28-2015, 05:11 AM
 
8,440 posts, read 13,440,097 times
Reputation: 6289
Quote:
Originally Posted by Juram View Post
The APA used to recognize homosexuality as a mental disorder too though, as more evidence is developed, views change and its only over the past 20 years that there has been this massive increase in easy availability of sexual content, adult dating sites and more online. It hasn't been but about a decade since these various porn tube type sites appeared, making finding porn easier than ever before with endless options available right at your fingertips, that is a whole world apart from browing usenet groups with a 14.4k modem. I think anything in excess can be harmful and there's definitely a multitude of anecdotal reports as well as as some limited studies which suggest that excessive viewing of pornography can have long-lasting effects in those who have obsessive-compulsive mindsets to start with.



https://www.psychologytoday.com/blog...addiction-real




Therapists in recent years have reported a large increase in those seeking treatment for sex addiction, to the point where the quest for sex, whether porn, adult dating sites or other such issues completely overwhelms their lives, similar to alcoholism or a drug addiction. They end up neglecting their job, their family, their hobbies, all in the quest for sexual gratification.



I don't think porn by itself is bad, much like I don't think that gambling or alcohol in moderation are necessarily bad, but I do think that as with alcohol and gambling you have those who for whatever reason, are predisposed to not being able to simply view porn in moderation and compulsively let it and the quest for more sexual stimulus take over their lives. Alcoholism has run rampant through my family, for that reason I have largely kept my distance from alcohol, I just never want to wind up in that downwards spiral of lost control that comes with addiction, I've seen friends struggle with addiction to painkillers as well as alcoholism and it never pretty, I have no difficulty believing that there are those who also struggle with sex addiction, whether its because of OCD issues or whatever the case might be.




You're assuming that there is a cure, that you can just talk and medicate your way towards a resolution. We can't cure pedophiles worth a damn, and recent studies suggest a possible genetic link in some cases, meaning some are just born with a tendency towards various forms of sexual deviancy such as pedophilia. This is one possible explanation for the ridiculously high recidivism rate among pedophiles.


I agree Juram about the classification problems and differences of opinions we've seen between the Diagnostic and Statistical Manual III (DSM) through the versions revised until DSM-V was released. As you correctly state above, DSM-V removed homosexuality as a mental disorder. Sexual or porn addiction is indeed among the classifications of disorders where many clinicians and members of the APA on the committee to update DSM-V don't necessarily agree.

However, in making a total assessment, a clinician has to decide the highest GAF vs. score of when the person seeks treatment. Sexual functioning, in a physically healthy person, is part of the score. As you posted above, there is a hypersexuality diagnosis. More importantly to me is anyone who has treated enough sexual offenders who sexually abuse children or adults, requires the person to view others as less than him or herself.

Thus, other diagnoses from Conduct Disorder, or Impulse Control, to some of the Personality Disorders and other diagnoses must be considered too. Does the person have an anxiety disorder, so s/he medicate with alcohol? Does that alcohol or illicit drugs decrease control so the person lowers his/her own inhibitions about inappropriate and often ill-legal behavior?

It's a complicated Web to untangle, which is why no sex offender treated in the agency I directed ( and also saw offender and victim clients), never completed treatment before 18-24 months.

The place where JD is won't provide any psychotherapy. I don't have a problem with him praying, he should for his victims, imo. I also think there is merit in working hard physically. But, one does not eliminate individual, group and later family or couples therapy. JD won't get confronted nor have to really take responsibility for all his inappropriate sexual behavior. I'm not very hopeful of how he can improve in this setting. With his GED, perhaps more than many, he needs to be taught ways to cope, ways to not act out sexually some accurate information about sex and human physiology and more.

Can Josh comprehend what he's done to all his victims? Probably not. While many talk about the sexually repressed environment he grew up in, that may or may not be a factor for him. He may have much deeper issues with his dad talking about trying to make another baby, or who knows what he heard or saw as a younger boy or teen at home? He may have very strong and buried feelings that his mother was always pregnant and somehow gotten the wrong messages about how come their family "had to keep having babies to keep their tv show," etc. There is so much that needs covered clinically and nothing will be at this Bible reading work camp where he'll pray for hours daily. But JB and M spoke at this IL facility years ago and are seen as those addicts should want to become. This facility has treated, per their self description, drug and alcohol addicts. However, I saw nothing about having treated sex offenders and those who are hypersexual.


MSR
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