Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
PEOPLE ARE IDIOTS! I've never been a parent, but I've certainly been a kid, and I will tell you if you want them to go after whatever it is that you don't want them to do, make it forbidden. You will have problems that you never DREAMED of, especially if you can't give the kid a good reason. Making certain otherwise benign activities forbidden communicates to children that you think they are inferior to you. Why do you think there are irrational behavior problems in public school and prison? Take away the humanity of a person, and in some cases they will act like something less than human.
The best strategy is to learn their habits and provide really good distractions so that they don't think about doing what you don't want them to. For instance, if the kid loves the outdoors, get a dog, a trampoline, a swimming pool, a basketball goal, a playhouse, or something to keep his or her attention. Don't bother with door locks or whatever, because kids aren't animals and if they want it badly enough, they'll figure out a way to get it. Just keep really good distractions around. I personally was more interested in TV and video games. I knew I could leave whenever I wanted, if I wanted, but my parents knew how to keep me entertained and somewhat out of trouble, so I never really bothered. I mean, why would I want to miss the Saturday morning cartoons or that video game I loved playing by actually going outside and getting lost?
This "take away a privilege to make the activity more interesting" is a great strategy, I think. It would have worked on me every time had my parents known what to do, but I didn't let them in on the secret, at least not to my knowledge. For instance, if your kid doesn't want to do chores, take the privilege of doing chores away from them. Forbid them to do chores and "shame" them by never giving them the opportunity and making a big deal about how "dangerous" you think it is for the kid to handle a "deadly weapon" like a mop or broom. This works! (or at least it did for me...) Kids always want to be part of something that makes them feel independent. Grounding is also great, but it takes away those all so important distractions I mentioned earlier and doesn't cause them to focus on and crave the privilege to do the beneficial things, like chores. Also, this may not work with all kids. I was an independence fanatic, though, so it was very effective with me.
Because obviously the doors were not locked properly or didn't have child-proof rubbers on the knobs. Otherwise, the kid wouldn't have been able to get out of the house.
And what parent goes back to sleep when a 5-year-old boy is afoot?
By the time he's 5 I better be able to go back to sleep.
No charges should be pressed, I'm sure Dad was scared enough as it was.
When I was in kindergarten, I attended 2 different schools. The first school was in a rural area, so I got a ride to the bus stop with the neighbor kid, who was also in kindergarten. Then, part way through the year, we moved to a neighborhood in a small city, and the bus stop was a few blocks away. So, I just walked to the bus stop with the other kids who also walked to the stop. I grew up in a blue-collar family, and they had to be at work almost 2 hours before school started, so I never expected to get a ride to school!
Nowdays some parents drop their children off at the bus stop. I lived in town. I walked about 1/2 mile to school, a 1/2 mile back home for lunch, a 1/2 mile back to school, and 1/2 mile home at the end of day until I was in about 3rd grade.
My daugher was telling me that she knows a lady that dresses her school age children. She said that this person comes across as a control freak in other ways.
Because obviously the doors were not locked properly or didn't have child-proof rubbers on the knobs. Otherwise, the kid wouldn't have been able to get out of the house.
And what parent goes back to sleep when a 5-year-old boy is afoot?
Yikes! Confession time for me... I once went to work on my day off. Totally spaced it.
At 5 I knew if I got up early on Saturday, I was allowed to watch TV quietly! I am sure the parent thought the kid went back to bed! No harm, no foul, no one was harmed.
actually i'm sitting here reading the whole thread, and the other one about the dresser falling on the boys...and i am reminded of when i was 5, my siblings were a little older. my siblings and i got up on a saturday or sunday morning while our parents were still sleeping. i don't know if they knew we were going to the park by ourselves. did someone tell them? or did we just go? i don't know. but i do remember that the story is that they were still sleeping when we left.
i don't remember being hit.
obviously someone called 911 and parents were there to ride in the ambulance with us.
we obviously could have died. but i'm glad they weren't arrested for neglect!
fortunately my scar isn't bad and it actually looks like i have a dimple on one cheek.
i can think of a lot of things that i think my parents could have done better, differently, etc. but this incident? i don't blame them at all. kids do stupid stuff.
edited to take out some detail! got a little too detailed there. oops!
Last edited by beachie123; 01-04-2017 at 11:15 PM..
that true, but I don't think anyone is suggesting that a parent should never sleep while their 18 year old is awake. Not that it's likely to be an issue with a teen waking up too early while the parent wants to go back to sleep!
You can say that again. My son could have slept through an asteroid hit.
He was far brighter than I was at his age. He learned how to open two different kinds of cabinet locks and got to the stove top twice, despite the guards.
Please register to post and access all features of our very popular forum. It is free and quick. Over $68,000 in prizes has already been given out to active posters on our forum. Additional giveaways are planned.
Detailed information about all U.S. cities, counties, and zip codes on our site: City-data.com.
Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
I've never been a parent, but I've certainly been a kid, and I will tell you if you want them to go after whatever it is that you don't want them to do, make it forbidden. You will have problems that you never DREAMED of, especially if you can't give the kid a good reason. Making certain otherwise benign activities forbidden communicates to children that you think they are inferior to you. Why do you think there are irrational behavior problems in public school and prison? Take away the humanity of a person, and in some cases they will act like something less than human. 
jk
