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I totally get it - but what if you have a child under 6 who KNOWS how to eat and act properly in public? We've taken our little one to all kinds of swank places and she acted the proper little lady. I agree about the unruly kids - but what about the good ones? We are super disciplinarians and won't let her get away with the crap. We take her outside or to another room until she stops the bad behavior or we leave. I agree that parents need to get with it. It is really quite sad that the ones that won't control their kids are going to ruin it for those of us that can.
I'm not bothered by children who are behaving. Sadly, it's the bad ones who ruin it for everyone else. That goes for everyone, not just children. How many stupid rules and laws do we have because of a minority of idiots? Is it fair? No, but life isn't fair. Fair is where you go to ride rides.
I think it is absolutely sad that some people are supporting this but everyone has that right. My opinion is that it is very sad if the majority of a society thinks like this. I really hope it never gets to be a majority.
Actually it's the parents who let their kids run around in restaurants who are sad. They cannot control their kids in a potentially dangerous area. Parents who discipline their kids is so rare these days....and I don't mean spanking...I mean teaching them appropriate behavior and how to treat others. These days everyone is too self-absorbed to discipline.
I have two kids and it's appalling and embarrassing to be with some of my friends and family to the point where I no longer join my friends' families in restaurants. Family comes into town only a couple of times/year...and I have a margarita!!
Actually it's the parents who let their kids run around in restaurants who are sad. They cannot control their kids in a potentially dangerous area. Parents who discipline their kids is so rare these days....and I don't mean spanking...I mean teaching them appropriate behavior and how to treat others. These days everyone is too self-absorbed to discipline.
I have two kids and it's appalling and embarrassing to be with some of my friends and family to the point where I no longer join my friends' families in restaurants. Family comes into town only a couple of times/year...and I have a margarita!!
Too right.
Sadly the well-behaved child is the one you don't even notice because they're being quiet. You only notice the bad ones so it's easy to form the view that all kids are that way. I know that they aren't, but so many of them are.
My nephew, for example, can be that way. When we have family gatherings and I'm having to do the booking, I try to find a private dining room as often as I can to prevent him from disturbing other patrons. I also never book us at nice restaurants, opting for 'family friendly' dumps like TGI Friday's or Outback Steakhouse. Sad but true.
I have kids and I so support this..especially the really savage unruly no manners spoiled brats..
yep....
Quote:
Originally Posted by BigDGeek
I think it's absolutely sad that parents won't discipline their children and expect the rest of us to put up with their kids bawling, screaming, whining, and running wild everywhere we go. It's BS and it needs to stop.
yep.....
Quote:
Originally Posted by JenG1974
I totally get it - but what if you have a child under 6 who KNOWS how to eat and act properly in public? We've taken our little one to all kinds of swank places and she acted the proper little lady. I agree about the unruly kids - but what about the good ones? We are super disciplinarians and won't let her get away with the crap. We take her outside or to another room until she stops the bad behavior or we leave. I agree that parents need to get with it. It is really quite sad that the ones that won't control their kids are going to ruin it for those of us that can.
would that ALL parents took the time and energy and love to raise their children as you are.... i have seen over and over and over and over again through the years that since it is easier to just give in to the tantrum and demands and bad behavior, that is what happens..... i tip my hat to you.....
I think it's absolutely sad that parents won't discipline their children and expect the rest of us to put up with their kids bawling, screaming, whining, and running wild everywhere we go. It's BS and it needs to stop.
You know, I understand that you don't have kids, so I kinda understand where you are coming from, but not ALL children do what you have described because they want to get on strangers nerves. Children do not bawl, scream, whine and run wild because they want to upset you (you as in general) they do that because they are children, imo. There is a certain amount of discipline that parents must impose but not to the point of abuse (imo) because we are so scared what the stranger next to us is thinking or putting up with because our child is out of control.
Most parents understand that a child will act up every now and then because, unlike adults, they do not have control of their surroundings or of getting what they want. Of course, there are boundaries, unfortunately, those boundaries sometimes must be taught in public and sometimes even more than once. Have we all forgotten that we were children first? Can not we ask our mother's if we also had these behaviors?And then perhaps have a little more patience just like the stranger who put up with your (in general) running wild when you were 2 years old?
IMO, no one will fix the children (if they really need any fixing) unless the parents are fixed first. And if the parents need fixing it may be because THEIR parents did not fix them in the first place when they were children. And how about if they did not grow up in a loving home with both parents around? Then there are a whole lot of other issues that come into the parenting arena. This problem is extremely complicated but to take it out on the children is cruel, imo.
And although I know you do not know me nor have ANY idea of my family life, I would like to point out, just for argument's sake, that I get countless of compliments on my children on how well behaved they are. I guess most people expect for a 10, 9, 6 and 6 year old to act up, and when they see that they do not, they are so surprised that they must come up to me to compliment me on their behavior.
You know, I understand that you don't have kids, so I kinda understand where you are coming from, but not ALL children do what you have described because they want to get on strangers nerves. Children do not bawl, scream, whine and run wild because they want to upset you (you as in general) they do that because they are children, imo. There is a certain amount of discipline that parents must impose but not to the point of abuse (imo) because we are so scared what the stranger next to us is thinking or putting up with because our child is out of control.
Most parents understand that a child will act up every now and then because, unlike adults, they do not have control of their surroundings or of getting what they want. Of course, there are boundaries, unfortunately, those boundaries sometimes must be taught in public and sometimes even more than once. Have we all forgotten that we were children first? Can not we ask our mother's if we also had these behaviors?And then perhaps have a little more patience just like the stranger who put up with your (in general) running wild when you were 2 years old?
IMO, no one will fix the children (if they really need any fixing) unless the parents are fixed first. And if the parents need fixing it may be because THEIR parents did not fix them in the first place when they were children. And how about if they did not grow up in a loving home with both parents around? Then there are a whole lot of other issues that come into the parenting arena. This problem is extremely complicated but to take it out on the children is cruel, imo.
But this is why there should be places that are for adults only. Even well behaved kids act out - it's part of being a kid. But adults should be able to enjoy a nice quiet meal in an upscale restaurant without being interrupted by someone's child. There are places that are child and family appropriate and places that are not. No one is saying to ban all kids from all restaurants, but some should not allow kids.
I never really know how to take unsolicited compliments over my children's behavior. Part of me is honored. Part of me is a little indignant that the other party just assumes my kids will behave poorly.
If someone wants to have an adults-only environment, that's their prerogative. Such establishments already exist (ex. bars and strip clubs). That being said, I don't frequent adults-only establishments often because I have kids and am with them more often than not. As far as establishments that are adults-only merely for atmosphere's sake, I doubt I'll visit them at all. I'm not interested in financially supporting a business that feels the need to exclude members of my family over preconceived notions of how they'll behave.
I totally get it - but what if you have a child under 6 who KNOWS how to eat and act properly in public? We've taken our little one to all kinds of swank places and she acted the proper little lady. I agree about the unruly kids - but what about the good ones? We are super disciplinarians and won't let her get away with the crap. We take her outside or to another room until she stops the bad behavior or we leave. I agree that parents need to get with it. It is really quite sad that the ones that won't control their kids are going to ruin it for those of us that can.
+1
I've taken my kids to 'nice' restaurants (like Oceanaire, Bob's Steak/Chophouse, Fogo de Chao) numerous times in the past for dinner when they were as young as 3 years old without any behavior issues. I am all for enforcement of rules regarding loud obnoxious behavior in public places and private businesses -regardless of the age of the perpetrator. I have seen some adults behave worse in public than many children. If a business will boot ANYONE being loud and obnoxious - I support this 100%. If they are instituting a blanket ban on all and only children, while it's totally their right as business owners to do, it's rather foolish.
Quote:
Originally Posted by hal2814
I never really know how to take unsolicited compliments over my children's behavior. Part of me is honored. Part of me is a little indignant that the other party just assumes my kids will behave poorly.
This reminds me of one time when we took our 1 and 3 year old kids (at the time) on a flight, I think it was to Denver. As we boarded the plane you could almost feel the wave of silence and stares preceding us walking down the aisle as people saw us coming. No one really spoke a word until the wheels hit the runway at our destination, then as we were unbuckling and gathering our things people started interacting playfully with our kids and complementing us/them on the good behavior. Pretty funny.
But this is why there should be places that are for adults only. Even well behaved kids act out - it's part of being a kid. But adults should be able to enjoy a nice quiet meal in an upscale restaurant without being interrupted by someone's child. There are places that are child and family appropriate and places that are not. No one is saying to ban all kids from all restaurants, but some should not allow kids.
I agree about the upscale restaurants or other upscale establishments. Those places are mostly for people who have money which may mean young, professional singles or older past 50s older people who have money to spare. Of course there are other ages in between who can also afford upscale places. Those are not the places I refer to because more often than not, children aren't really present in a place like that. The article or maybe the whole movement is in support, at least it seems to me, to ban children where now they are present. What I don't like is that it seems that people in support of this movement seem to forget, as I'm glad you put it, that it's part of being a kid. Why do adults forget this?
What I don't like is that it seems that people in support of this movement seem to forget, as I'm glad you put it, that it's part of being a kid. Why do adults forget this?
Blows my mind too...now I'm not talking about people who don't WANT kids, I'm talking about people who actively hate them. Did you just have a TREMENDOUS amount of self-loathing as a child?
I spent 2 years as a hostess in a restaurant that was frequented by families, young couples, older couples, singles, etc. Sure...there were kids who caused issues. However, there were just as many rude and obnoxious adults...
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