Getting strange feedback from the locals. Why did you move here? (Houston: homes, per square foot)

[RJ312]

Originally Posted by Chloe333

My spouse's younger coworker last year filled him in about Tinder one day at lunch and then when we were having dinner out, the subject came up. He marveled at the idea that you could just swipe the profiles, and then like magic, people you like could show up and meet you where you are. He said exactly what you are saying that back in the day, he never really ever met anyone out at bars stating, "It just doesn't happen." Yet, his impression was that the coworker had all sorts of dates and fun with these people he would easily meet on Tinder.

Tinder is well past its prime, if it ever had one. Bumble is now a hotter app, if you can call it that. Both Tinder and Bumble are gigantic wastes of times, just like online dating sites before them were gigantic wastes of time. There is no substitute for the in reason experience right away before an actual dates. Sites and apps create a lot of what I like to call one and dones (one date, no sex, no future interaction). One & dones are generally a waste of time for both sexes, but especially for males, who are usually footing the bill for drinks dates in bars.

The one & done is probably the most common outcome, much more common than the one night stand, casual sexual relationship, or committed relationships.

Originally Posted by Treasurevalley92

It's changed the way bars work:


https://www.forbes.com/sites/scottbe.../#7a6e803934c0

There are still a lot of seduction attempts done at bars that are not technology aided.

[Treasurevalley92]

Originally Posted by Chloe333

Interesting. I'd be surprised though if as many women as the article portrays go meet the random Tinder date and then just hop into bed with the person later that night at the hotel. I'm sure some do but lots would feel uncomfortable and even frightened with doing something like that with a practical stranger.

It's alot safer than taking an uber to a strangers house or bringing someone you don't know into yours.

I think it happens fairly frequently.

[Treasurevalley92]

Originally Posted by RJ312

Tinder is well past its prime, if it ever had one. Bumble is now a hotter app, if you can call it that. Both Tinder and Bumble are gigantic wastes of times, just like online dating sites before them were gigantic wastes of time. There is no substitute for the in reason experience right away before an actual dates. Sites and apps create a lot of what I like to call one and dones (one date, no sex, no future interaction). One & dones are generally a waste of time for both sexes, but especially for males, who are usually footing the bill for drinks dates in bars.

The one & done is probably the most common outcome, much more common than the one night stand, casual sexual relationship, or committed relationships.

There are still a lot of seduction attempts done at bars that are not technology aided.

Well, I think "Tinder" is used to mean all the swiping apps, Bumble, Tinder, etc. It's like the "Xerox" term for dating apps.

Believe me, I've met people at bars, but it's a hell of alot cheaper to use Bumble because at least you know they are single and if they match they are at least superficially interested in you. Buying a drink for a girl can be a pretty expensive 5 min worth of conversation if she isn't interested or is married or something lol.

Once, and I kid you not, I talked to this girl for like 2 hours, we ran up quite a tab, I got here number, all that and were going to meet up again, and I saw her put her wedding ring back on right before hopping in her uber. Of course, the number was a fake, but her name was real looked her up on FB and she was married with a kid. lol

Yeah most dating app dates are "One and Done" as you describe, but I think thats how first dates have always been idk if dating apps make people more prone to hook up on the first date or less, I simply have no idea.

Anyway, I can only speak for my friends and myself, but most of the hype about picking up girls at the bars is just that, hype, we rarely make much effort at all, if it happens it happens, but it's mostly about going out and having fun.

[RJ312]

Originally Posted by Treasurevalley92

Well, I think "Tinder" is used to mean all the swiping apps, Bumble, Tinder, etc. It's like the "Xerox" term for dating apps.

Believe me, I've met people at bars, but it's a hell of alot cheaper to use Bumble because at least you know they are single and if they match they are at least superficially interested in you. Buying a drink for a girl can be a pretty expensive 5 min worth of conversation if she isn't interested or is married or something lol.

Once, and I kid you not, I talked to this girl for like 2 hours, we ran up quite a tab, I got here number, all that and were going to meet up again, and I saw her put her wedding ring back on right before hopping in her uber. Of course, the number was a fake, but her name was real looked her up on FB and she was married with a kid. lol

Yeah most dating app dates are "One and Done" as you describe, but I think thats how first dates have always been idk if dating apps make people more prone to hook up on the first date or less, I simply have no idea.

Anyway, I can only speak for my friends and myself, but most of the hype about picking up girls at the bars is just that, hype, we rarely make much effort at all, if it happens it happens, but it's mostly about going out and having fun.

Tinder/Bumble has the potential to be expensive because you're buying drinks for the female on a date. In a standard bar pickup attempt, it has never been my practice to buy a woman a drink. That's an outdated move. Women have either been attracted to me based upon my look and persona, or not. The cost of Tinder/Bumble dates is similar to the cost of a Friday/Saturday night out on your own looking to seduce and covering your own drinks.

The best means of meeting potential dates is through one's social network, such as friends of friends, acquaintances of co-workers, that sort of thing. I've never had a social network that was capable of providing me with dates, so I've been a cold approacher. I have used multiple venues-bars, grocery stores, gyms, fitness classes, malls/stores. I prefer non-bar venue approaching. For the larger populace, I think non-bar venues are usually better options for finding higher quality women for longer term relationships.

As a fellow man, I feel bad for you with the married woman experience. It doesn't look like you were looking for no strings attached sex with a married woman, so you didn't attempt that. Tough break!

[Chloe333]

Originally Posted by RJ312

In a standard bar pickup attempt, it has never been my practice to buy a woman a drink. That's an outdated move.

I would think that move is timeless on some level. Even though some of the dating/mating rituals have changed and evolved, it's still deeply wired into the female primordial brain to prefer males who generously share resources. I can see how you wouldn't want to get used and taken advantage of by buying all the drinks though. I think that taps into some of the male primordial fears of women taking advantage and even worse being cuckolded.

I know Denver men were publicly called out in a Westword article for being lazy, stingy lovers. This group held a symposium to address the issue and women said the pattern was for the many bros of the city to just text them to come over and drink beer while watching sports with the bro's friends. This was supposed to be a date and the women said it was so prevalent that they had no choice but to go along with it. Denver males were voted the least datable per this article.

This group did say that Dallas women were the most datable.

When Mick Jagger was dating again after his partner died, Jerry Hall came out and in interviews said that he was a stingy, cheap lover. She accused him of making her use all of her modeling money to buy food and clothes for their five kids. He vehemently denied this in interviews. I think Jerry was trying to scare away potential young new mates for Mick knowing that he could easily reproduce with them taking resources from her own kids. She's known for being a smart lady, and she went right for smearing him in an area that matters a lot to many females: male willingness to share resources.

[Treasurevalley92]

Originally Posted by RJ312

Tinder/Bumble has the potential to be expensive because you're buying drinks for the female on a date. In a standard bar pickup attempt, it has never been my practice to buy a woman a drink. That's an outdated move. Women have either been attracted to me based upon my look and persona, or not. The cost of Tinder/Bumble dates is similar to the cost of a Friday/Saturday night out on your own looking to seduce and covering your own drinks.

The best means of meeting potential dates is through one's social network, such as friends of friends, acquaintances of co-workers, that sort of thing. I've never had a social network that was capable of providing me with dates, so I've been a cold approacher. I have used multiple venues-bars, grocery stores, gyms, fitness classes, malls/stores. I prefer non-bar venue approaching. For the larger populace, I think non-bar venues are usually better options for finding higher quality women for longer term relationships.

As a fellow man, I feel bad for you with the married woman experience. It doesn't look like you were looking for no strings attached sex with a married woman, so you didn't attempt that. Tough break!

Yeah, I mean it is what it is. lol

No, I'm not into dating married women, at the very least its a violation of the Golden Rule. If a guy has a wife whose down to cheat on him, hes got it bad enough as is, I don't want to be the guy that does that to him. Someone else may, and if they can live with themselves and do that so be it lol

I think the advantage of getting drinks on a bumble/ tinder date is that they are usually single. In a bar you don't really know. Also, I usually know if there is going to be a second date before the first drink is done, so Im not going to run up a tab on someone who just wants free drinks. You can't ALWAYS tell, but I think usually you can.

I've found the best bumble/tinder dates are a week night Stars or Mavs game. You can get often get Tuesday tickets for about $10 so it's really not that bad. Half the girls on bumble at least pretend to be Stars fans for some reason, though I think I've only ever gone out with one who actually watched hockey. Usually they are pretty fun and it's sort of a laid back "Activity" that you can talk during, share exciting moments with, etc.

The down side is if it goes bad you are kinda stuck, but only once was it so bad that I decided to leave after 3 quarters "This game is a blowout, and I have to work early" apparently wasnt enough of a hint to her and she though we should go back to my place so I just told her I was tired, walked her to her car and definitely never texted her again. lol

I've had decent luck though my social groups, but usually it's friends of friends at a pregame or house party. I think women like men who have good social status, so seeing you comfortable around friends and people who like you and are able to handle yourself without becoming a total $&!& show can boost your sex appeal.

In the end, there more than one way to skin a cat. Do what works for you

[EDS_]

Is the average age of the last several posters over 21? Literally I'm horrified for our country if you jokers ever actually take charge.

[Chloe333]

Originally Posted by EDS_

Is the average age of the last several posters over 21? Literally I'm horrified for our country if you jokers ever actually take charge.

What statements do you find so offensive?

[EDS_]

Originally Posted by Chloe333

What statements do you find so offensive?

Not offensive but shallow, well some of the comments are offensive.

[RJ312]

Originally Posted by Chloe333

I would think that move is timeless on some level. Even though some of the dating/mating rituals have changed and evolved, it's still deeply wired into the female primordial brain to prefer males who generously share resources. I can see how you wouldn't want to get used and taken advantage of by buying all the drinks though. I think that taps into some of the male primordial fears of women taking advantage and even worse being cuckolded.

This is a fair assessment. It would get expensive for a male out in a place like Uptown/Downtown/Deep Ellum doing approaches at night to buy a drink for every woman he approaches. This is one of the key differences between doing in-person approaches at night at Tinder/Bumble. With Tinder/Bumble, a male is automatically picking up those first drinks, both for himself and the female. If the initial interaction is in-person at the bar, it is optional to do and picking up a drink does not necessarily equate with enhanced attraction.

A male can demonstrate higher value and provisioning ability through his looks. Attire choices and accessories can do so rather than buying a $7-$10 drink. If a female sees a well put together man, buying a drink for her isn't going to move the level of attraction.