What I Wish I Had Known, Two Years In (Dallas: houses, neighborhoods)

[crazyforger]

Originally Posted by calgirlinnc

I am just one person living in one of the many DFW suburbs, so with the disclaimer that my perspective is limited, maybe some of my impressions after two years will be helpful to other newcomers. This comes after 20+ years in the SE, and before that, Southern California.

--driving, distances, commute: if there is one thing I could get through to everyone moving here it is: live as close to your jobs or to schools as possible. I swear that DFW exists on a different space-time continuum than other places. It takes MUCH longer to go the same distance as wherever you are from, unless you are from California. Interstates are confusing. Drivers are reckless; it's not unusual to be contending with someone going 95 and someone going 50 on the same stretch of interstate. Roads are often rough. There are far too many questions like "the job is in Fort Worth and we want to live in Lovejoy"....no, no, no don't do it! My number one piece of advice is to live close to where you need to be on a daily basis.

--the heat: I think what's really exhausting is how long the heat lasts. It's now Mid-September and it is still mid-90s. It's been mid-90s forever. I can take the heat, and the sun; it's more that there is no break from it for months on end.

--schools: we were in a tricky situation with one child who is pursuing the arts and has learning disabilities, and needed a school with a strong CTE program, and another child who is academically gifted. I feel we got a good balance with our district. But what I would reassure myself about retrospectively is that unless you have a particularly high achiever in a certain discipline, or someone who is extremely gifted, is that any one of the top 25 schools here would be fine. Outside of the top 2 or 3 schools, in the end, there isn't all that much difference between them. The particular teachers your child has and the particular kids your child goes to school with will have more of an impact, and that's just random. Principals come and go, programs like band and theater and football do better and worse, so don't worry about it too much. Don't overlook some of the schools that don't get hyped but are still very solid schools. I would also say that the earlier you move the easier it is for your child. It's harder to move in at the HS level, and I've heard this repeatedly from multiple families who have moved HS kids.

--things to do: I've often read that there isn't much to do here besides shop and eat. I find this to be really untrue. We've enjoyed excellent concerts both in Dallas and in Fort Worth, championship college sports, professional sports, boating, bicycle riding, horse racing, the zoo, the botanical gardens, museums, etc. in addition to more regular activities like bowling, movies, golfing, etc. The reality IMO is that there is plenty to do, but you have to plan ahead and be prepared to spend some money.

--people: my impression after 2 years is that almost everyone is outwardly friendly and polite, but it takes a long time to make connections with people who are established here.
It has been that way for all 4 of us, but YMMV.

--DFW in general: my advice is, don't expect DFW to be like wherever you have just moved from.
Take it for what is. You aren't going to find some quaint New England town hidden away in the middle of the metroplex. Having said that, there are pockets of lovely homes and nice shopping and good amenities all over DFW. Many complain that DFW is ugly and lacks scenery. I say you have to find the charm that does exist but is not the same as other places.

--Don't speed in school zones. If it says 20, go 20. You'll thank me later.

--Housing: depending on your budget, you may have an easier time finding a house if you reserve some
cash to make improvements to the "worst house in the best neighborhood" before you move in. If you insist on everything having been updated by the seller, you will pay more for it than if you rent for a month or two and update before you move in. A three car garage is a really great thing to have here. Also, don't overload that garage with junk and park in the street! Park in your garage! If you find a house with trees, the shade makes a difference. A one story house with 12 foot ceilings is better to cool than a two story house with two story ceilings in the foyer and the great room.

Overall, I'm not sorry we moved here, but I don't think I want to stay forever either. There was a comment on another thread that that "this is an easy place to live" and I disagree with that. IMO it takes a very good salary to really live well here. The weather is not an easy thing to contend with, be it hailstorms or the heat or the flooding rains. Traffic is not easy here. On the other hand, schools are very good, people are pleasant, and the wealthier suburbs are among the nicest you'll find in the country.

Feel free to add what you wish you would have known...

Very sensible post.
I have experienced similar things. One thing that helps quite a bit is if you are in the right community.

[masonsmom4]

I moved here in 2014 and I agree with every single thing.

[Aeliza]

That there is no relief from the summer heat. Sure, I knew it'd be hot in TX, but I didn't realize it wouldn't cool down in the evening much. Who wants to sweat profusely on an evening walk? It pretty much keeps me in June-September. I also disagree on there being a ton of things to do. The weather alone limits you. If you're an outdoorsy person, Dallas is a no.

[stan4]

Originally Posted by calgirlinnc

Two more:

--fences are ridiculously expensive

--for us, coming from a low tax/low property tax state, the lack of income tax here does not offset the high property taxes and sales tax.

You hit on some things (including the above) that many people here don't realize.

I have had friends coming from Cali and other higher COL parts of the country who don't realize how NOT CHEAP it is to live here. Even had one move back to San Diego after a year of disillusionment as to how far her dollar would go (it wasn't enough of a difference in lifestyle augmentation to be worth leaving beautiful SD).

I think your best pieces of advice were EXPLORE, fix up in a fantastic neighborhood, and live close to work/school.


This is the first summer I didn't spend the entire time outside (injuries, etc). As a result, I did not acclimate. When I re-initiated my outside activity, the heat pounded me down into a pulp.
Lesson: The heat here is not bad if you bother to acclimate. It can be brutal if you just randomly decide to be active outside one day.

[stan4]

Originally Posted by Aeliza

. The weather alone limits you. If you're an outdoorsy person, Dallas is a no.

If you are truly an outdoorsy person, you'd be outside enough all year to acclimate and you don't really get bothered by the heat.
Acclimation is key.

I'm not saying anyone should be running a marathon at 2pm in August, but 6am-noon and 6pm-dark don't really bother most of us who spend a lot of time playing outside. It's mid-late afternoon that the heat gets nutty.

[Aeliza]

Originally Posted by stan4

If you are truly an outdoorsy person, you'd be outside enough all year to acclimate and you don't really get bothered by the heat.
Acclimation is key.

I'm not saying anyone should be running a marathon at 2pm in August, but 6am-noon and 6pm-dark don't really bother most of us who spend a lot of time playing outside. It's mid-late afternoon that the heat gets nutty.

Respectfully disagree. My husband was born in Mexico City, and never acclimated to the weather in Seattle (even after 18 years there). Personally, I do not enjoy 90° weather at 8pm. Also, the outdoorsy offerings here are bland and boring. I certainly don't want to sweat profusely in boring terrain.

[stan4]

Originally Posted by Aeliza

Respectfully disagree. My husband was born in Mexico City, and never acclimated to the weather in Seattle (even after 18 years there). Personally, I do not enjoy 90° weather at 8pm. Also, the outdoorsy offerings here are bland and boring. I certainly don't want to sweat profusely in boring terrain.

Acclimation to outside temperature requires being outside regularly. Not just living somewhere.


When you talk about sweating profusely in boring terrain, it sounds like your idea of outdoor activity is walking or hiking/biking. I would hate that, too! Though I live near some beautiful scenic parks.

We 'outdoorsy types' in DFW play golf, tennis, soccer, and football. Heck, I even watched people play cricket the other day.
We boat and fish and hunt. I don't see what picturesque terrain has to do with any of that. There's TONS of outdoor activity.

The average HIGH temperature is only above 90 three months of the year, so it's pretty unlikely anyone is dealing with 90 degrees at 8pm with any regularity. Certainly not today.

I get you, though. This is NOT the easy to just pop outside and enjoy the weather kind of place a few months out of the year (winter and summer). Not like California, etc.

[Aeliza]

We didn't just live there, we were active. Played soccer (and he also coached), golfed, hiked, kayaked, rode street and mountain bikes, and more. In fact, we were active outside daily. While perhaps he tolerated it, he never fully acclimated.

Participating in athletics is one thing; you're going to be focused on the game primarily. Picturesque means little in that equation. If you like biking, walking, hiking, etc., different story.

Glad it works for you. It won't and doesn't for everyone.

That said, you can still make the most of where you are. I love my neighborhood and my commute is cake compared to my LA and Seattle commutes. I can do a few years here. But I'll eventually go back West.

[calgirlinnc]

Originally Posted by stan4

You hit on some things (including the above) that many people here don't realize.

I have had friends coming from Cali and other higher COL parts of the country who don't realize how NOT CHEAP it is to live here. Even had one move back to San Diego after a year of disillusionment as to how far her dollar would go (it wasn't enough of a difference in lifestyle augmentation to be worth leaving beautiful SD).

I think your best pieces of advice were EXPLORE, fix up in a fantastic neighborhood, and live close to work/school.

Thanks.

Yes, it's expensive now and undoubtedly that has affected property availability. The people who live behind us are empty nesters who are the original owners of the house. They won't sell because they've been priced out of everything decent.

My husband's salary and bonus here puts us solidly in the middle. I'm not complaining; it is a good living. But in our old town, we would have been in the best neighborhood, etc. The wealth here truly is staggering...just the cars I see on a daily basis are something. Again, coming from California it's probably not shocking, but from a lot of other places it is.

Another thing I forgot to mention is how nice and new everything is here. That is a definite plus.

And as bad as the summers are, October through April are pretty nice. I really enjoy the wind here, although I know many don't.

[Redlionjr]

Originally Posted by Aeliza

That there is no relief from the summer heat. Sure, I knew it'd be hot in TX, but I didn't realize it wouldn't cool down in the evening much. Who wants to sweat profusely on an evening walk? It pretty much keeps me in June-September. I also disagree on there being a ton of things to do. The weather alone limits you. If you're an outdoorsy person, Dallas is a no.

So if your that sensitive to the heat why wouldn’t you do extensive research on the weather and why would you move here to begin with? I don’t do cold weather at all but I had a job offer in Chicago and did crazy research to see if it was a city I wanted to move my family too. Once I found out that it’s cold 9 months out of a year I easily declined the offer. Now maybe because I grew up in Texas I’m use to the heat. I’m never limited in doing activities outside. Yes it is boring terrain but I’m not limited to going out and doing things when it’s hot. Even here in Houston where the humidity is super thick I can still do whatever whenever even if I sweat more than I want to.