Should I stay in Dallas? SO of 3 years broke up with me. How is the Dallas dating scene? (moving, metro)

[CoastieOnTheMove]

Originally Posted by dallas_cowboy

Kids - In all honesty, with 200K salary even as single income parent can grow kids in Dallas. I would recommend you to consult financial advisor and learn more on financial demand to support kids. I've kids and plan to support them financially thru their undergrad, but I can understand that not all parents can afford that or believe providing financial help after high school. I personally know a friend, who was scared to become parent and not ready to have baby until he hold the baby in his hands and now he thinks it's the best thing happened in his life.

6 - Sorry to know that your parents went thru the split. But don't discourage yourself that it could happen to you. Commitment and adjustment requires from both sides and that leads to a successful marriage.

7. Austin is more vibrant than DFW. Going to CA and NYC will change your lifestyle as well. Based on what I read, it appears that you prefer to stay in major cities with moderate cost of living which goes against staying in NYC or even San Diego.

PS: Finding a life partner is difficult as finding a new job or even more lengthy process. Patience is required in both. Clear your head on what you want from your partner, define the process to find the perfect match and follow it. Always look for improvement in the process as necessary.

I know I'm not ready for kids yet despite my salary...I think there's a lot more that I would like to do first before that.

6 - yeah, going to work through this piece a bit in therapy to get over it.

7 - I prefer to stay in major cities with a good cost of living. But if I need to move some where for happiness, that's where I'll have to go.

It just honestly sucks and is unfortunate. But I can heal and move on. I need a social circle to begin with

[FreeVilley]

You need to move cities, and you are not ready to date.

a new city doesn't automatically make you a new person, so do work on yourself.

If you don't move and exhibit some kind of take charge actions, the next woman will hear your story about getting back with an ex, and how she left you abrubtly and she will either see red flags and run, or she will be attracted because she thinks she will be able to dominate you.

[Aggielina]

Can you find some networking groups for your field? It could help you professionally and if it expands your social circle, then bonus! Also a local club for the university you went to? This could be especially great if the university has televised sports and the club hosts watch parties. Or even a professional team from another city that you follow? There might be an organized fan group here that you could get involved with.

I can't speak to other cities, but I came to Dallas from Austin. I left Austin at the beginning of my 30s for various reasons, but one of them was I didn't see myself meeting a partner there. I wasn't interested in bars and the night scene very much anymore, and it felt like when I did go out, I only met people who were still in the throes of the college scene. Not being a Longhorn, I felt like I didn't fit in. Ultimately I met my husband in Dallas through mutual friends.

I also think a prior poster's advice to cut ties with your ex is solid. I had a past relationship that was on again, off again, and finally I decided that I was done and didn't want to let myself get pulled in again. Best decision ever! Good luck to you!

[CoastieOnTheMove]

Originally Posted by Aggielina

Can you find some networking groups for your field? It could help you professionally and if it expands your social circle, then bonus! Also a local club for the university you went to? This could be especially great if the university has televised sports and the club hosts watch parties. Or even a professional team from another city that you follow? There might be an organized fan group here that you could get involved with.

I can't speak to other cities, but I came to Dallas from Austin. I left Austin at the beginning of my 30s for various reasons, but one of them was I didn't see myself meeting a partner there. I wasn't interested in bars and the night scene very much anymore, and it felt like when I did go out, I only met people who were still in the throes of the college scene. Not being a Longhorn, I felt like I didn't fit in. Ultimately I met my husband in Dallas through mutual friends.

I also think a prior poster's advice to cut ties with your ex is solid. I had a past relationship that was on again, off again, and finally I decided that I was done and didn't want to let myself get pulled in again. Best decision ever! Good luck to you!

Thank you so much for this! I used to be a big dancer (was competitive in swing, casual in salsa/bachata) and runner. Developed some anxieties/fears about working out and dancing after developing a heart condition from asymptomatic covid. Developed a fear of flying too. Finally starting to get back into working out and working through everything else.

Yeah, I'm 31. I don't drink anymore (gave it up over a year ago). Really wondering if I can build a community here or not

[bgNCATL]

Dear god people! Any metro with damn near 8 million people is fine for dating! Cali and LA is where you move when your not trying to get married lol! If you can’t find someone decent in a place like Dallas, moving won’t help!

[urbancuriosity]

You're still in pain. Give yourself space and time to heal before making a major decision like moving. You will heal and you will move beyond this.

[Ralph_Kirk]

Originally Posted by CoastieOnTheMove

Thank you so much for this! I used to be a big dancer (was competitive in swing, casual in salsa/bachata) and runner. Developed some anxieties/fears about working out and dancing after developing a heart condition from asymptomatic covid. Developed a fear of flying too. Finally starting to get back into working out and working through everything else.

Yeah, I'm 31. I don't drink anymore (gave it up over a year ago). Really wondering if I can build a community here or not

Dallas Swing Dance Society

[WorldKlas]

Originally Posted by Ralph_Kirk

Dallas Swing Dance Society

OP has been provided info on Hiking for Singles through the Dallas Sierra Club; Running Clubs, and swing dancing. There’s also a Facebook page DFW Hiking & Outdoors and probably lots of FB groups for all kinds of other interests.

He has to decide if he wants to stew in misery for a while or start the next chapter now. Regardless, a new chapter will start in his story. He’ll determine when to open the next page….

[CoastieOnTheMove]

Originally Posted by WorldKlas

OP has been provided info on Hiking for Singles through the Dallas Sierra Club; Running Clubs, and swing dancing. There’s also a Facebook page DFW Hiking & Outdoors and probably lots of FB groups for all kinds of other interests.

He has to decide if he wants to stew in misery for a while or start the next chapter now. Regardless, a new chapter will start in his story. He’ll determine when to open the next page….

Oh not stewing in my misery. Went out to a meetup to socialize this past Friday (coincidentally last place I had a beer - realized I don't need alcohol anymore same night). Did a group fitness class Saturday. Joined a sports league.

Looked at a couple of new apartments as well. Considering staying in Dallas to see if I can make it my own. There seems to be a lot of similar, successful people around the Uptown area. I've always liked walkable so that will help as well.

I'm someone who's highly extroverted - Covid and my ex haven't helped me build up a social circle. I figure running away isn't going to solve any of my problems. All of my friends from the Academy and NYC were super supportive and pointed out how she wasn't the best for me to begin with.

Cheers to new adventures, y'all

[HeadedWest2020]

This thread has plenty of good advice. Curious to see how the OP is doing nearly 3 months after.
As someone who is considering a move to DFW for work, and knows a few guys who work remote (white collar jobs or IT), they both shared dating was a challenge pre-pandemic, but has improved somewhat in recent months.