A gay question...literally (Denver, Colorado Springs: camping, live in, dangerous)

[one802013]

I'm moving from San Diego to Denver early next year, and I'm curious about the people there...specifically the gay guys. Yes, I understand that it's unfair to generalize a group of people, however, there are usually common characteristics/trends.

I'm hoping gay guys in Denver are more masculine than gay guys here in SD. I feel the guys here are pretty feminine, they like watching "the kardashians" or "real housewives of," they care way too much about their hair/nails/looks, they are materialistic, they are very into "the scene," and like to wear things that are super tight or like to wear close to nothing at all (and just love a cute tank top).

Where are the gay guys who like to go hiking, and camping? or partake in outdoor activities other than going to the bar to gossip? The guys who are just...I don't know...guys?

I really don't mean to offend anyone...there is nothing wrong with the guys I mentioned above- they just aren't my type. I guess I'm just a bit upset and hoping for a nice change. I feel like I just don't "fit" in with the crowd here...hoping that'll change in Denver.

Any advice/thoughts/feedback?

[ViolentDisasters]

Honestly, with that attitude, I think you'd be better off moving to Colorado Springs and hooking up with one of the closeted Evangelicals there.

Most of the gay men here in Denver are just complex human beings who don't really concern themselves with perpetuating any sort of butch/femme stereotype. Many of the gay men here here like looking good AND getting dirty, we like watching sports AND watching musicals, we like hiking mountains AND hitting the clubs.

[cowboyxjon]

I've visited San Diego but I can't really compare, as I've never lived there and haven't tried to date there -- but I did live in LA for a little while.
I think you may find what you are looking for in Denver and these types of guys probably exist in San Diego as well. There are sports teams to join like flag football (a gay co-worker plays in a league) and plenty of guys who are into outdoor activities and sports. My partner and I like to camp, off-road, and hike, though the groups we hang out with aren't all gay guys (a few straight couples too).

Hope this helps somewhat. And you know what? Your question is TOTALLY OK. The type of guy you mention above -- basically guys who wish they were teenage girls from the 80s/90s who are hanging out at the mall OR guys who wish they were black women -- are not the types of guys I find attractive either. You'll find that type here too, however.

[one802013]

Many of the gay men here here like looking good AND getting dirty, we like watching sports AND watching musicals, we like hiking mountains AND hitting the clubs.

I don't think I explained myself clearly (my apologies). These are the kind of guys that would be great to meet- guys who can comfortably be a bit of both and not solely be interested in the clubs/looking good. Also, definitely not into hook ups...looking for some great new friends and eventually something more substantial than that.

The type of guy you mention above -- basically guys who wish they were teenage girls from the 80s/90s who are hanging out at the mall OR guys who wish they were black women

That's pretty spot on, LOL. Thank you for your reply; much appreciated!

[denverian]

I'm not into the "gay scene" in Denver since I'm married and we have kids, but I did live here for a couple years in the 90s before meeting my now husband and moving to California. Anyway, it seemed like there were all types in Denver. I never noticed there being a majority of fem acting gay guys.

Now we live around a lot of gay couples with kids, and they're just typical people. You'll probably be pleased with they types of guys you'll find here.

[Techn0lady]

(note to self: create gay bar with "Lumberjack Nights" to lure traffic in from So Cal area ... )

[Mike from back east]

Originally Posted by Techn0lady

(note to self: create gay bar with "Lumberjack Nights" to lure traffic in from So Cal area ... )

Lumberjack? Did you say Lumberjack? Well, here's the bartenders.....



https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sZa26_esLBE

[CravingMountains]

Edit: Sigh, I'll be an adult about this.

OP, just like San Diego or any other city in America it is all about the situations that you put yourself in. What bar do you go to? What do you do outside of work to get to know other gay men?

Some people make me laugh because they hang out at the flash rave bar and they hope to meet super masculine men there. You won't. Well, you might, but it is unlikely.

Every city has the hangouts that the out-doorsy and active people go to. This bar is usually the place where sports teams are organized as well. I am still new to Denver but I think the place to do that here is the Wrangler.

I can say that on Grindr here, there are plenty of men talking about their affinity for out doors activities. But from what I have seen the gay scene here is the exact same as the gay scene anywhere. It is all about the situations you put yourself in that will determine who you meet.

[one802013]

I think that's the issue...I just don't really know where to go.

[certainquirk]

NOTE, I'm generalizing here, and that's dangerous stuff. Nonetheless:

Denver is far too prissy and materialistic for me, but I think that's probably true in all big cities.

Colorado Springs, Pueblo would be places to check out. Pueblo probably doesn't have much of a gay scene at all, but I'm sure there's plenty of gay ppl. The Springs might make a decent trade-off for you, particularly coming from California -- it's likely to seem very low-key, modest, and not at all flaming or prissy.

You can have as much of California as you want in Colorado (besides the beaches and warm weather) or you can have damn near none of it (blessedly, IMO -- I left California in the early 90's and I've never regretted it once). So again, I'm generalizing and that probably makes me 90% wrong already. Best of luck to you.