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Going from a 44 to a 46 is way different than gaining 50LBS ... I'm sorry, I know this will sound kind of shallow, but unless there's been some kind of accident that you've been in or some sort of illness that's come over you which caused you to gain weight do to taking certain medications and/or not being able to exercise, then gaining 50 LBS over a relatively short period of time and not making the least bit of an attempt to keep yourself sexy for your mate is wrong in my opinion. This is true for both men and women.
Yes, I think a compromise should be doable. 100 lbs is a bit low. 150 is a bit high. Something in between sounds right.
"Should my husband love me the way I am?" If we say YES, will that make him love you more?
If you want to be sexually desired again by him, I suggest to have a talk and negotiate.
Sexual attraction is not something you can negotiate, what kind of silly notion is that? Better question for the OP - what is it that allowed you to stop caring what your man thinks of you?
Sexual attraction is not something you can negotiate, what kind of silly notion is that? Better question for the OP - what is it that allowed you to stop caring what your man thinks of you?
She does care what her husband thinks of her that's the whole point of this thread!.
He must really be a jerk, to want her to look the way she did, when he decided to make a commitment. the nerve.
Not to say that she bears no responsibility and shouldn't think of her husbands needs, but it's ridiculous to expect that if you get married for the long haul, that you and your spouse have to stay exactly as you were on your wedding day. People change, mentally and physically.
She does care what her husband thinks of her that's the whole point of this thread!.
If she really cared, she wouldn't put on 50 lbs, since she knows he likes petite women. I think women do this type of stuff, because they know that once they are married they have the man by the balls, so its no longer important to try to be attractive to him. They cut their hair short, they gain weight and a long list of other nonsense. They should do everything they can to keep the spark and sexual attraction/polarization alive while most do exactly the opposite.
Not to say that she bears no responsibility and shouldn't think of her husbands needs, but it's ridiculous to expect that if you get married for the long haul, that you and your spouse have to stay exactly as you were on your wedding day. People change, mentally and physically.
I absolutely agree with that, but I don't think putting on additional 50% of your body weight, in a short period of time, is what you have in mind.
Yes, he should love you for you - and he probably does. But, he does not desire overweight women - including you.
I am more concerned about your lack of concern for your health AND your husband's feelings.
Your husband cannot help that he is not attracted to overweight women. However, considering the fact that he has gained a few pounds, he needs to re-examine how he is coming across.
You need to make an effort as well instead of saying, "Well if you don't like it, that's too bad!!"
And 50 pounds is more than "a bowl of cereal every night before bed." Are you growing an emotional attachment to food?
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