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Justthe6ofus, I grew up with cats, we always had cats, and I used to be so completely ignorant of dog language that I had no idea if they were happy, angry, shy or curious. So as a result, I was terrified of dogs. Then one day I decided that I needed to have a dog in my life--it was a realization that felt absolutely right, but I also knew that I had my work cut out for me, so I started reading books about dogs, dog intelligence, dog nature, and selecting and raising dogs. I must have plowed through 20 books before I felt ready--and even so it was a huge surprise to me in terms of what was easy, and what was hard, once we finally got the puppy I wanted. But all went well, and I'm now a dog person in addition to still being a cat person. But we don't have cats, because members of my family have cat allergies.
Now I'm assuming that since you say you haven't owned dogs, you don't know dogs very well. If I misread you, I'm sorry. But if you're jumping into a whole new life phase with dogs, I would say that (1) I would not recommend that you foster dogs as an initial phase: the dogs will be rescue dogs that have even less of a clue about being in a good human home than you have about giving dogs a home, and they need guidance from you, not on-the-job training. It's not just a matter of having your heart in the right place--you actually have to know so much about dogs that you can train a possibly untrained, terrified, abused dog to be a good companion for other humans without a clue...(2) Talk with friends who have dogs, hang out with the dogs, offer to feed them and walk them for a weekend while your friends are out of town. Take them to a dog park they're familiar with and watch them play (but make sure they know you well enough to obey you when you call them), observe their play language and their aggression, and learn to tell the difference. Don't adopt a dog "cold" without actually having experienced communicating with dogs, especially since your cats rely on you for protection against predators. You'll make everyone at home miserable if you do.
(3) You can create rules in your home with "upstairs is no-dog territory," and it will be better for your cats to be upstairs until everyone gets used to being of the same "tribe," but remember that young dogs need to sleep close to the pack. It doesn't have to be in the same bed, and most dog trainers would recommend against that, anyway, for dominance reasons, but they feel much safer if they can be in the same room with you; that's only natural.
(4) Read a bunch of books, and learn about the totally different psychology of dogs. There are several schools of thought when it comes to dog training, but even an older dog needs to be trained and learn your house rules. And your family needs to on board with the training and not undermine each other. You can get an older cat and pretty much count on her being civilized and self-reliant, but it doesn't work that way with dogs!
That being said, I think it's a wonderful idea to expand your multi-species family to include a dog, now that you have enough time, but do train yourself before you make a real life-altering decision! Good luck! I think it's at least as important to learn to speak "dog" as to learn a second human language...
Now I'm assuming that since you say you haven't owned dogs, you don't know dogs very well.
You are somewhat correct here. I had a dog as a young child (under 10yrs of age) but I did not train that dog, my parents did most of that. I was also around dogs growing up as all of our family and friends have owned dogs.
Cats were actually more "new" to me than dogs because I had never owned one growing up (my husband had). We started off with cats because we wanted to add a companion to the family that was easy to care for but still be affectionate and somewhat trainable (we've taught our cats "fetch", "down", "come" and a few entertaining "tricks").
Lately I have "dog-sat" friends dogs (in our home) and I take my friends dog for a walk when she cannot be home for an extended period but I have not trained these dogs, they have already been trained.
(1) I would not recommend that you foster dogs as an initial phase: the dogs will be rescue dogs that have even less of a clue about being in a good human home than you have about giving dogs a home, and they need guidance from you, not on-the-job training. It's not just a matter of having your heart in the right place--you actually have to know so much about dogs that you can train a possibly untrained, terrified, abused dog to be a good companion for other humans without a clue...
Very good point! Something I did not actually consider. We had thought of the possiblity of taking on a small puppy or small breed but you are right, on-the-job training is not what is best for that dog. Maybe volunteering at the shelter would be a better approach for both the dog and myself.
(2) Talk with friends who have dogs, hang out with the dogs, offer to feed them and walk them for a weekend while your friends are out of town.
We do this, which is what turned us on to the possibility of adding a dog to our home.
(3) You can create rules in your home with "upstairs is no-dog territory," and it will be better for your cats to be upstairs until everyone gets used to being of the same "tribe," but remember that young dogs need to sleep close to the pack. It doesn't have to be in the same bed, and most dog trainers would recommend against that, anyway, for dominance reasons, but they feel much safer if they can be in the same room with you; that's only natural.
I've actually read a lot about crate training and potty training so I'm glad you mentioned this too. The cats have already claimed the kids rooms so it made the most sense for the dog to be in our room at night only. During the day upstairs would be off-limits for the dog which would also give our cats a "get-away". We had thought we'd put one crate downstairs for naps/safe area and one upstairs for bedtime. Would this be a good idea or would it just confuse the dog with two crates?
(4) Read a bunch of books, and learn about the totally different psychology of dogs. There are several schools of thought when it comes to dog training, but even an older dog needs to be trained and learn your house rules. And your family needs to on board with the training and not undermine each other. You can get an older cat and pretty much count on her being civilized and self-reliant, but it doesn't work that way with dogs!
That being said, I think it's a wonderful idea to expand your multi-species family to include a dog, now that you have enough time, but do train yourself before you make a real life-altering decision! Good luck! I think it's at least as important to learn to speak "dog" as to learn a second human language...
Thanks for all your tips and info! Greatly appreciated!
i was in pretty much the same situation that you're in when i got a dog - i had cats and had only had a dog in my household as a child. i decided to volunteer at a local shelter, both to give myself an idea of the responsibilities involved in owning a dog, and to get a better idea of what qualities i was looking for. the only drawback was that i found the perfect dog a lot sooner than i expected and had to change around some travel plans!
i don't think i can add anything else to the good advice that's already been given. it seems like you're really thinking this whole thing through and that's a really good sign.
i was in pretty much the same situation that you're in when i got a dog - i had cats and had only had a dog in my household as a child. i decided to volunteer at a local shelter, both to give myself an idea of the responsibilities involved in owning a dog, and to get a better idea of what qualities i was looking for. the only drawback was that i found the perfect dog a lot sooner than i expected and had to change around some travel plans!
i don't think i can add anything else to the good advice that's already been given. it seems like you're really thinking this whole thing through and that's a really good sign.
LOL, we were discussing the big oil spill at the dinner table with the kids the other day and how it is possible it may come up the east coast (our vacation is to the Outter Banks of NC).
After visiting a rescue event today they told me they hoped our vacation was cancelled because of the oil spill!! They are anxious to have a new member in the family, so much so they want their vacation cancelled!
I had to remind them that if the oil spill does come to the Eastern coastline it will effect a LOT of the wild animals that live there. Now they are hoping it's contained sooner than later.
Justthe6ofus, well, you're one giant step ahead of where I was when we got our first dog, having already had dogs in your life! I think you can have two crates, one upstrairs and one downstairs--it shouldn't confuse a dog too much. And then you'll have an extra crate for when you get dog #2!
Two crates will not be a problem at all. Most dogs have a crate and a favorite seat/dog pillow. Your dog would just have 2 crates instead. Also, it is great that your dog will be allowed upstairs for the night... I would otherwise anticipate a lot of whining and crying when the entire family goes upstairs and leaves the dog alone. Even if it doesn't cry, it would be happier near you.
Finally, the biggest issue may be your kids knowing your rules for the dog and following/firmly enforcing them. If they let your dog get away with stuff, that would slightly undermine your training. Definitely don't let the dog boss them around.
Good luck! It looks like you are a conscientious person and your new dog will be so much better off with you and your family than where he/she is right now.
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