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I have counseled every Florida parent to put their children into private school, especially those with autism. Public schools provide the bare minimum and only what is required by law, mostly b/c if they do anything outside of or above and beyond an IEP, they can be sued.
When we lived in Florida, I was good friends with a professional couple who had one child, severely autistic. Though they could afford private schools, but instead they moved to a certain town in Palm Beach County, Florida, because of the incredible level of public investment into "special needs" kids like the autistic.
Their kid got pretty much one-on-one teaching from a variety of different specialists, and another set of professionals to provide for the kid's other needs (at age 8, he was not yet toilet-trained). The cost of this one child to the school system was over a million a year, and included experimental therapies like using someone else's hand to "guide" the autistic child to communicate. While I understand that my friends would want to devote the maximum amount of society's resources for their child, I cannot say that this was a good idea from the taxpayer's point of view.
Instead of devoting infinite resources to the children who are the most damaged, as a society I think we should be devoting resources to the children with the most intellectual promise. Instead, we convince the hardest working, smartest Americans to bear obscene tax rates--rates that will never allow them to save enough to retire on, now that pensions are gone.
Instead of devoting infinite resources to the children who are the most damaged, as a society I think we should be devoting resources to the children with the most intellectual promise. Instead, we convince the hardest working, smartest Americans to bear obscene tax rates--rates that will never allow them to save enough to retire on, now that pensions are gone.
So we devote no resources to children with special needs, do you know what happens to them when they become adults? They become wards of the state, and you are already paying more for them than you were when they were children getting state of the art education. I believe in investing in the future. 1 in 88 children have autism. Welfare and Medicaid is going to be pretty expensive for them, or are you suggesting Eugenics. Eugenics worked for Hitler, I'm sure it'll work just fine for the US.
BTW, I work in a very good school in a good district and we have a great program, but I've often thought that if I had a special needs child, I'd homeschool him/her. As good as we are, we simply can't provide the individualized attention that they need b/c there are so many of them and they are all so different. We do what we can, but we're stretched out way thin and the budget cuts have taken their toll.
I agree. I also work in what is widely considered a very good district. Up until recently, we had very few children with autism in our building. Most were center based. More autistic students are entering their base schools and general ed. classrooms now and I wonder if it is truly the best placement for some.
I agree. I also work in what is widely considered a very good district. Up until recently, we had very few children with autism in our building. Most were center based. More autistic students are entering their base schools and general ed. classrooms now and I wonder if it is truly the best placement for some.
I wouldn't mind putting my son in center based care until he is capable of sitting in a classroom, most children on the spectrum eventually mature to be able to handle the classroom. The problem is partially over-zealous administrators (IMHO). Special needs children from military families bring funding to school districts, and many administrators place them in areas that are not good fits, because in 2-3 years, the children will no longer be that administrator's problem. The more strict the IEP, the more state funding in some states. Unfortunately, in others that's not the case. I wanted to put him in a private ABA placement, but I had a husband, doctors, teachers, and even therapists who was being pushy about mainstream with an aide. I'm not an expert, I only know my son. I also know that the teacher totally changed with him as soon as I became the difficult parent. IF the school administration had said at the get-go, we can't handle this child, let's see what placement can, I would have GLADLY sent him somewhere that was good for him. FL has the McKay scholarship, I have ECHO funding. I gave the district the IEP in JUNE, I ASKED them if they were suited to handle a child with moderate autism in a mainstream classroom. The answer I got from administration was YES.
When we lived in Florida, I was good friends with a professional couple who had one child, severely autistic. Though they could afford private schools, but instead they moved to a certain town in Palm Beach County, Florida, because of the incredible level of public investment into "special needs" kids like the autistic.
Their kid got pretty much one-on-one teaching from a variety of different specialists, and another set of professionals to provide for the kid's other needs (at age 8, he was not yet toilet-trained). The cost of this one child to the school system was over a million a year, and included experimental therapies like using someone else's hand to "guide" the autistic child to communicate. While I understand that my friends would want to devote the maximum amount of society's resources for their child, I cannot say that this was a good idea from the taxpayer's point of view.
Instead of devoting infinite resources to the children who are the most damaged, as a society I think we should be devoting resources to the children with the most intellectual promise. Instead, we convince the hardest working, smartest Americans to bear obscene tax rates--rates that will never allow them to save enough to retire on, now that pensions are gone.
Most of the schools in PBCounty with the level of expertise that you have described do not exemplify the average public schools in the area to which I was referring: rather, they are public/charter schools who specialize in educating autistic students rather than the run-of-the mill public schools that include autistic students in their classrooms but then do not or are unable to provide the proper services and care to autistic and/or learning disabled students. It sounds as if the OP's son is in a typical Florida public school, not a new(er) specialized public/charter school for autistic children.
And while you may not think that a community should provide for its students with disabilities, obviously the people of the community (and the legislators that they elected) have decided differently.
I think that specialized public schools in FL. are a step in the right direction; the state has always lagged wrt its educational standards and, as of now, the typical public schools are seriously lacking and cannot meet a growing need to properly and empathetically educate autistic students who are just as much a priority as any student.
Last edited by StarlaJane; 09-28-2011 at 10:22 PM..
First of all, if he does these behaviors at school but not at home then doesnt that say anything? It just seems wierd. As for the doctor they can report whomever, but i doubt it will go anywhere. If cps has come to ur house several times already then i am not surprised. I am not harassing u, report if u wish. But u seem to be very high strung and if u come on a forum like this then how do u habdle ur son? Someone has to defend the teacher. Maybe she felt that she wpuld make the situation worse. You are already talking about suing because she did nothing. What if she would have done something and made it worse? I guarantee that you would be up at that school in a flash. I just feel bad for the teacher, she really felt like she was doing the right thing and i dont think she should have to suffer because of this situation
And one other thing people react to how they are treated if you were being a "difficult parent" its no wonder thay the teacher "changed" teachers are there to educate children and not deal with difficult parents. Im just sayin..
First of all, if he does these behaviors at school but not at home then doesnt that say anything? It just seems wierd. As for the doctor they can report whomever, but i doubt it will go anywhere. If cps has come to ur house several times already then i am not surprised. I am not harassing u, report if u wish. But u seem to be very high strung and if u come on a forum like this then how do u habdle ur son? Someone has to defend the teacher. Maybe she felt that she wpuld make the situation worse. You are already talking about suing because she did nothing. What if she would have done something and made it worse? I guarantee that you would be up at that school in a flash. I just feel bad for the teacher, she really felt like she was doing the right thing and i dont think she should have to suffer because of this situation
Yes, it actually does say quite a lot. It says that there is something going on different at school than it does at home. And the behavior is NOT just at home, he is doing very well at therapies as well. When I have them read the reports she sends home, they are amazed, because it's a different child.
When someone is reported CPS has to come, it doesn't matter if it's founded or unfounded. Here are the reasons CPS came to my home:
1. 9 months old not gaining weight, severe dairy allergy
2. Bruises on his head. From repeated head bangs.
3. Cut on his eye from banging his head through a plate glass window
4. Hotel management reported him screaming, from a tantrum
All of these, I was cleared of any wrong doing.
Secondly, I'm not high strung at all. Most teachers have commented that I'm very easy to work with. Evidenced by the fact that I felt that the IEP from the school was too stringent, and I asked the school district if they had any issues with it that could be discussed before my son was placed in the school. My son's teachers from the past are all my facebook friends, I call them to chit chat regularly (not about my son). My son's favorite teacher, her house burned down, and she lost everything. I gave her my car, I gave her my son's clothing, I gave her toys. If you are nice to me, I will walk on water to get you everything you need. My son and I are EXTREMELY close. Furthermore, if you think I'm high strung, how come I have not reported the fact that the school district is BREAKING THE LAW wrt his IEP. He is supposed to be in a mainstreamed classroom with an aide. He is in a self contained classroom with no aide. When he was in kindergarten, he was in a typical classroom with an aide-- NO behaviors.
Furthermore, if you think I'm coddling him or spoiling him, if you knew me, I'm strict. I have high expectations. My child is so well behaved, I have no QUALMS about taking him to a 5-star restaurant. I don't, but he is that good in public (funny how he won't swear in public, but he will swear in school). My SIL asks me how I get him to behave, because she can't get her children to behave, and they are NOT autistic. He is a good kid. Unfortunately, he is in a ugly situation.
I am not coming to the forum to ask how to handle my son. I KNOW how to handle my son. I am a military spouse, my son has had several different school districts throughout his life. And he generally forms very strong bonds with his teachers. I have NEVER had this happen to him. I'm trying to protect him. By law the school district is out of compliance with his IEP. Already they are not following the law.
How could stopping a 50 pound child make the child worse. I'm smaller than the teacher, and I can bear hold him. He has low muscle tone, he isn't that strong. Shoot when we went to the doctor and they wanted to look in his ears, he started to struggle. I did a restraining hold on him (I was trained to do it). Teachers in special education should be trained to do this hold. There are other ways to prevent him from banging his that don't cause injury to the person or the child. She has other children who are lower functioning, bigger, and more violent, yet she can't handle him.
I'm talking about suing the district, because 1. he is not in the appropriate placement, 2. the teacher is not trained to handle the students in her charge, 3. she waited to call me for 3 hours after he complained of losing his eye sight, because she thought he was being naughty (she has about as much knowledge of autism as you do-- which isn't much). If the district had INFORMED ME about their inability to handle a student, this would NOT had happened, because I asked on three separate occasions before he was enrolled in the school.
Just as the parent isn't always right, neither is the teacher. In this case, the teacher and the school district was wrong on many, many levels. How is ignoring a child, who normally does NOT injure themselves (except in your presence), injuring himself and then saying he can't see the right thing to do?! At least call the school nurse to MAKE SURE there is nothing really wrong with him. If you had a child in your classroom complaining of a tummy ache, he is pale, do you wait until he pukes all over you before you send him to the school nurse. Your tell him to buck up, you wimp suck it up? They have my number, if she had any questions at all, call me, e-mail me, do something.
Oh and BTW this isn't the first time this teacher has done something questionable. My son his extremely heat sensitive. Another trait of sensory seeking autism. She made him go outside in 90 degree heat with a 70 degree dewpoint in PANTS, and refused to allow him to come back in or have water. Even though I told her that he has issues with heat. That's why he hit her, and tried to bite her. Every other child is allowed to wear shorts during gym, but him. You try moving from a northern climate, after four weeks of being in the south, middle of the hottest summer on record, go outside and workout for an hour is sweat pants with no water and come tell me how that works out for you. Then imagine you are 7 year old.
Go ahead and defend her, because you sound like the rest of the school district. I did research on this district after the above instance. Do you want to know what they were doing last school year, they were teaching the kids how to wash toilets. Not reading, not writing, but cleaning toilets-- third, fourth, and fifth graders. When they were called to task on that, you want to know what they said, "well, they have to learn how to clean toilets somewhere, it's a lifeskill, and they were gloved." I'm not paying property taxes so my kids can learn how to wash toilets, I can teach them that at home.
And one other thing people react to how they are treated if you were being a "difficult parent" its no wonder thay the teacher "changed" teachers are there to educate children and not deal with difficult parents. Im just sayin..
They are breaking the federal law, and they put my son in the wrong placement, I'm not going to sit back and see what happens. I'm going to be difficult. Just as you feel you have to protect the teacher, I have to protect my child, who is more important. I'm not the only parent unhappy, most of the parents in the classroom are unhappy. And I'm not being difficult with her, I'm actually been quite nice to her. I've been difficult on the principle and the ESE staff. If it has any bearing on her, or causing her any stress, then that's a managerial problem (as they are deflecting the fact that they are breaking the law onto her). And this should NOT in any way affect the way my son is being treated.
JoJo- I feel for you, and I can't imagine having to deal with all this. Fight the fight, knowing you are the only advocate that your precious little 7 year old has. You might have better luck with some practical advice in the special needs section of the parenting forum, as this forum tends to bring out very defensive teachers.
Quote:
Originally Posted by texas69
ok im gonna address this again..you said your child is hitting biting or whatnot ..i understand he is autistic but he still needs to be shown that his is not correct. Alot of children that i have seen that are autistic are not that way. Second, you say he is touching himself..i find that to be disturbing and im wanting to know where did he learn all this stuff from. I think that you should rethink your parent strategies because he is obviously being coddled and spoiled, and who did he learn all the masturbation and cussing from? It all starts at home...
As for who to sue..are you kidding? Maybe the teacher couldnt stop and drop what she was doing to handle your child but remember she also has a classroom to run and she has more than one student in that class. She obviously communicated with you as soon as possible and that is still not good enough for you. You also were not there in the classroom when he did this. You are willing to crucify the professional who can speak for a child that cannot just because he is yours. Thats not right. The notebook is to document what your child is doing and it is to protect the teacher from parents who overreact which is just like this situation. The hospital can do whatever it wants...but cps is not going to investigate a teacher..they will however..investigate you..
Wow... just wow. You don't even have children, and you're judging someone on how they raise their autistic child??
You don't have a clue what this woman deals with day after day. I don't either, but I can certainly empathize with her struggles.
He just has to be shown what is correct... and he is just going to do it regardless of his disability? You should really teach a seminar to parents of autistic children on how to do this.... even parents of normally developing ones like me would appreciate your wisdom on how to do this! You have seen some children that are autistic, so now you are the expert on how autistic children act? He was taught how to masturbate at home? Who taught you????
Did she teach him to bang his head as well???
I now have to take some advil for the headache I now have from all the head swapping I just had to do.
Last edited by toobusytoday; 09-29-2011 at 06:27 PM..
Reason: removed personal comments - please address the posts and not the posters
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