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I just don't understand why the graduates and their families can't just have decorum for the ceremony with some exuberance at the end and then cut loose and do what they want at their individual graduation parties. Both of my nephews' HS graduation ceremonies were done with class in San Jose, CA a few years ago. The time for the sillier stuff can be done at the home during the graduates' party the parents usually throw for them.
There is one person in the crowd who will yell "freebird" at a bar and there is always a beach ball or two at concerts or graduation. Particularly when you look at the size of some graduating classes. My community college and university graduations were not at all as nuts as my high school one.
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Originally Posted by Mightyqueen801
I liked it that my daughter's university, which had about 3500 graduating, did not announce the names and have the graduates come up at the actual commencement ceremony. Instead, they had these individual departmental recognition ceremonies, which were much smaller. Her degrees were from two different departments. One's ceremony was for about 175 graduates, and it was done like an actual graduation, playing Pomp and Circumstance and calling each graduate up to walk across the stage, a few speeches.
The other department had only about 35 graduates. They did something different--the faculty was on stage, and as they called each graduate's name, a faculty member stood up and said something personal about each one. It was very nice.
Both events had food involved--the first had a reception outdoors before the ceremony, and the second had appetizers afterward. Then there was a university picnic for everyone the day before the university commencement exercises, plus fireworks at night--we were busy from Friday to Sunday. It was nice that they fed us so much, given that all the area hotels jack up their prices by at least 50% for that weekend!
My university one was similar, it was broken up through different colleges. Mine was the College of Engineering, the Franke College of Business (mine), and College of Forestry. There were two other undergrad ceremonies and one graduate ceremony. We had a speaker and individual name calling. I think my graduating ceremony had over 500 easy.
As for the reception, we did not get this. I had my post graduation lunch at Taco Bell. I am kind of jealous of the pomp and circumstance you had with your graduation. That sounds awesome.
It's obvious that you graduated with a bunch of savages.
Quite frankly, your trying to excuse modern behavior, claiming that it has always taken place, doesn't fly. I have been to a number of graduations over the years, and they are getting worse. Behavior is getting worse. When I graduated from high school in the mid 90s, the ceremony went rather smooth. Sure, there were a few bad behaving parents, but most behaved themselves. The students did, too.
Sure, teenagers do stupid things, but they aren't small children who don't know the difference between right and wrong. They have the ability to control their behavior. I did.
I do agree with you that something changes in most males during their mid-20s, and 25 is usually the age. I remember feeling different all of a sudden when I was 25 years old. It was like one week I felt less mature, and then all of a sudden, I started feeling more like an adult. That said, even in my teens and early twenties, I knew how to act. It was not hard to do at all.
Rather harsh and judgmental of you, don't you think?
IMHO the response of my class (I was brand new to the school and had only gone there for 7 months, so I wasn't an instigator) was in direct proportion to the commercialization and impersonalization of the entire graduation process. Pushing 1,500 kids through a graduation at the speed of light with RULES about "NO CLAPPING" - RULES about "NO Unseemly Exuberance during the pomp of the 'ceremony" and RULES about every little thing one can imagine was a situation BEGGING for a reaction.
This was a commercial venture. We could BUY class rings (OK, that's standard,) BUY special photographs, BUY the right to keep our caps and gowns, donate to our new alumni association. Our parents could BUY seats closer to the front. They could BUY special gold lined programs instead of the usual copied ones. The commercialization, the feedlot style of the graduation process, the fake diplomas, the fake pomp and circumstances, and the lack of concern for us as students were the tipping points.
These things don't often happen in a vacuum. When the school administration is pretending it's a solemn event and they turn it into a circus themselves, they can expect the students to do the same thing.
The real congratulations and celebrations happened at homes after the fake ceremonies. 1,500 or 3,000 students (as I saw this year at a local college) are just too big to take seriously. You sit in the high rafters with binoculars and hope against hope that you can see the tiny little bug of a person that looks vaguely like your child as they walk across a stage for 1 minute.
I came from a small midwestern town where graduation DID mean something. In some cases it was the highest degree many would ever earn and it was treated with a great deal of respect by the towns people and the students alike. It was taken seriously and celebrated appropriately.
I may also mention that my class wasn't throwing sex dolls, nor were there any airhorns. We blew bubbles and ran down the field together in a semi-spontaneous burst of teenage enthusiasm. We celebrated OUR accomplishments by running. No one was hurt. And it got the dreary long boring pompous ceremony over much faster. Savages? Wow. Pretty heavy indictment for a class that actually turned out quite successful overall.
If you want kids to act with more decorum, then recommend to the huge schools that they consider setting up their graduations to be more human and less robotic. Get better speakers. Break huge groups down into logical smaller groups for a more intimate type celebration. This isn't all on the kids.
The contest at graduation has been going on for decades at least in So. CA. My daughters graduated roughly 30 years ago in So CA. There was a formal shakedown of all students including clothing check and a patdown for hidden items like beach balls. A few Beach ball and lots of hand to the presenter items always got through. Note the object with the beach ball was always to keep it out of the reach of the monitors. In general the ceremony proceeded while the ball hunt continued. It could easily take ten minutes to catch some.
From other parents it was clear this had gone on when they graduated 25 or so years before that.
A set of cheers from the relatives was expected and tolerated.
None of this was bad or damaged the ceremony. Provided some comic relief for the otherwise stilted affair.
I would also note the stage was deliberately set up to allow a tumbling run without anyone getting hurt. And they happened and no one did. A couple of these kids were amusement park characters and well capable of pulling physical stunts in a small area so it made more sense to accommodate rather than prevent.
So tightly controlled and it worked OK. It would however be a drag if it got out of control.
"World is ending alert, people are having fun at an otherwise boring occassion."
These boring graduation cermonies remind of the boring wedding ceromonies; thankfully this boring (and I suspect puritan influenced) trend is being slowly eroding, taking its place is some actual fun.
I thought so highly of my undergrad and graduate school graduations, I did not bother to show up.
Yea, it does sound like "Stop Having Fun, Guys."
The only time it's fun to dress up is when you're actually dressing up for the purposes of fun. That narrows it down to three occasions really. Weddings, prom, and going to the opera (which for all ten of you who regularly attend opera, it's like seeing a play, only on crack. People are decked out in their finest).
However, men's formal continues to so boring and stuffy (there's no "cocktail dress" equivalent for men), and bears such painful reminders of tried and failed job interviews, that it's unpleasant rather than fun to dress up.
Graduation ceremonies are a time of celebration for those family members or friends who have achieved a significant milestone in their lives, whether it be a graduation from high school, college, or some other significant achievement.
Over the years, it has become more apparent that civil behavior at ceremonies has been on the decline. Today, it is not uncommon to hear hoots and hollers, whoot-whoots, loud yelling, screams, and even air horns.
All of this makes you think, when did it become acceptable to behave in such a manner at a ceremony that is supposed to be serious?
At a recent high school graduation ceremony, observed were graduating students batting beach balls, blow-up animals, and even a blow-up sex doll amongst the various graduates. At first, it seemed as though school officials were resigned to let it happen. However, as the number of pool toys increased, school officials stepped in and conviscated the toys. Even then, only one student was ejected from the ceremony.
What was even more shocking was the public's reaction to the ejected student, a student of whom when being asked to leave stripped off his robe in front of everyone, used hand gestures, and acted as though he was going to "moon" the entire crowd. The crowd began to boo. This at a graduation ceremony? The crowd seemed more concerned about supporting an unruly student than maintaining proper decorum and civility at the ceremony. Amongst the boos, you heard people yelling, "he didn't do anything", and then in almost unison, the crowd chanted, "let him back in", while they stomped on the bleacher floor. This whole incident caused the ceremony to be delayed, and even after they restarted the graduation, the crowd still wanted to talk and show their displeasure. Seriously, while this was going on, it felt as though I was sitting in the stands of the stadium displayed in the movie, "Idiocracy", whereby the crowd was cheering on uncivil behavior.
The student's behavior as they crossed the stage was also just as dissappointing. About eighty percent of the students felt the need to give a "shout-out" gesture to the crowd as they crossed the stage. Amongst these "shout-outs" were various dances, hand signs, back flips, etc. The school officials didn't try to prevent this type of behavior. There were even students grabbing their crotches and doing "booty dances" on the stage. One even imitated moving down on a stripper pole.
The whole ceremony was surreal. Not only did all of the above occur, but some people were using airhorns when their graduate walked across the stage, which drowned out the beginning anticipation of the next graduate.
At a promotion on this same trip, I experienced people leaving early after their graduate was called. When the crowd was asked to stay seated until all graduates had left the building, a full one-third of the audience got up anyway and proceeded to leave the building, despite graduates still on the floor within the building.
The prior episodes took place at a ceremonies attended out of state on the west coast. I'm not certain if things are less civil in that part of the country, but even in the South, where I'm from, while attending a college graduation, I experienced the following:
-Air Horn blared off at a college graduation
-Non-Stop talking by some people during the ceremony
-People up and down throughout the ceremony
-Loud screams and yelling, almost a "cat call" variety
What has happened? When I graduated from college nearly fifteen years ago, I saw nothing more than a few mild yells, and even then, it wasn't but a fraction of the graduates. Now, I'm seeing about eighty percent of the graduates' names followed by loud yells, as well as various other rude behaviors found randomely throughout. When I graduated from high school nearly twenty years ago, behaviors like I seen would have resulted in at least two dozen students being ejected from the ceremony. The ceremony would have been stopped for each instance. The crowd definitely wouldn't have cheered those misbehaving, for such behavior is savagery.
Is this more evidence that society is becoming dumber and less civil? An "Idiocracy", have you. Other things noticed were people on their phones during the ceremony, not for pictures, but talking, texting, and on facebook. Some attenders at the graduations were wearing t-shirts displaying sexual and graphic language. What is going on? Is society becoming dumber and less civil? Have you experienced anything of the sort like this?
kids today live in a "youtube" world,,
they want an outlandish moment to act out- and laugh about later on..
if you look ,,, most all the traditions and ceremonies are being trashed on,,,people dont seem to care anymore and god forbid you make a judgement (gasp)
i lay alot on the parents- if my kid made lewd gesture while on stage-this would embarrass the whole family
and i would be VERY disappointed
only a few times in life are most of us in formal ceremonies,,,is it too much to ask that it is civil?? or do you always have to justify,,the lowest common denominator?
I remember our high school graduation,,,a few kids wanted to set off firecrackers because it would be "funny" and memorable,,, well, one girl stood up and said what a high school diploma meant to her immigrant grandmother and she would have no part of it,,, but that made some of us realize,,this is a formal procedure for a reason
The children now love luxury; they have bad manners, contempt for authority; they show disrespect for elders and love chatter in place of exercise. Children are now tyrants, not the servants of their households. They no longer rise when elders enter the room. They contradict their parents, chatter before company, gobble up dainties at the table, cross their legs, and tyrannize their teachers.
This quote is attributed to Socrates but cannot be verified. Regardless, it was oft quoted in the 1960s.
I graduated from HS in 1984; we each gave a penny to the principal as we shook his hand...there were 543 of us. We had a beach ball and playing cards due to the length of the ceremony. In college we had bubbles and beach balls.
While what was described in the OP is worse than what I experienced, I would say it is a linear progression vs exponential loss of decorum. Kids will be kids. Now the behavior of the audience as described is different/worse, although there were air horns in 1988 also.
I think the time to let "loose" is at the very end (throwing caps in the air, loud cheering, etc). Maybe that is old school, but it is also a show of respect for those over 60 that are attending and expect some degree of class. Remember there are grandparents that go to graduations, too. I don't mind if the valedictorian throws in a joke to break the ice, but also address the importance of the occasion. It can still be classy and yet more entertaining than a funeral...the happy medium!
Maybe it is just different for different generations, I really don't understand why a graduation should be a solemn event instead of a celebratory one.
Then why don't they just not attend ? You'll get your diploma/degree mailed to you anyway.
Because it's not as fun.
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