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It was middle school for me too. I came to school in fear each day because many of the bullies suspected that I was gay and harassed me for it. By high school, everyone was accepting and there was no more bullying.
Gay bullying ended in ninth grade for some reason, in tenth grade everybody started coming out. One of the best things about living in NYC is how supportive people are if you're gay or bi.
Interesting I think high school is worse because they can do more damage. My sister was bullied so badly in high school that she ended up having to switch schools and even then the girls wouldn't leave her alone. She ended up having to get a restraining order against these girls and the judge let the girls have it when they went to court.
Worse in Middle School due to.
1) Human Social Development stages 12-15 puberty onset - angst of self identity definition/ discovery
2) Variance in Physical maturation rates means 'physical' bullying types have target rich environment (those with slow physical maturation rates)
3) Most middle schools in municipalities school systems become pools of a cities larger student population geography, bringing populations of former elementary students from different schools in contact with each other which causes tribal posturing / jockeying for social standing (of which bullying manifests as one form of this behavior)
4) Since Middle Schools tend to send the same groups onto the high school in unison (versus the elementary to MS transition) there seems a slightly lesser tribal social positioning.
5) As others mentioned in HS most tend to focus more in upper grades on college / career paths to some degree)
6) The non reforming bully delinquents (those lacking emotional maturation) usually engage in other illicit behaviors which tends to weed them out or have them removed, whether due to legal structure (prosecutable juvenile offenses) or parental / social services intervention
Ancillary topic: If you want to deter bullying somewhat, establish societal rites of passage that are more than getting an automobile drivers license, sexual experience, being able to vote, drink, smoke tobacco (not that people abide by the current ages deemed acceptable) - but rather, do something like an outward bound program with a team approach to compete against the elements of nature, think Spartan mindset with some oversight - or a 'chaperoned' Lord of The Flies scenario.
It would be good to establish self sufficiency in teams as a natural rite of passage.
^ Worse in Middle School I think for the following reasons
1) Completely right about maturation rates. There are massive differences in maturation during that life period, and the highly developed kids have an enormous advantage that is going to disappear in high school.
2) Kids who are bullied have less emotional maturity to deal with their situation, as compared to their older peers.
3) Weeding out of some bullies by natural selection such as juvy or dropping out.
4) Other bullies become too focused on SATs and their careers.
We also had worse penalties for various behavior in HS...more people were in varsity sports and other activities that they cared about, and you'd be suspended from teams and participation if you got into trouble for bullying people. In middle school, there was a lot of "look the other way," and no real consequences.
I was bullied a lot in early elementary school (starting in kindergarten). I grew up in a very wealthy, small city, and was - and I kid you not - the only non-white student in all of my schooling. It started out with "brownie," and then once 9/11 happened, I got bullied over being "a terrorist."
By 6th grade, I was done with it - I hit my breaking point, and I was on the edge (not like, going to go on a shooting rampage, but just plain pissed). So, one day, two kids that usually bullied me, were giving me an exceptionally hard time during soccer in P.E.
One jumped me from behind - I managed to grab his arm, swung him around several times, launching him into a pile of rocks, and then went on to deck the other kid in the nose - didn't break it, but it sure looked nasty. Luckily, the P.E. teacher saw the whole thing, so I didn't get in trouble.
Low and behold, I was never bullied again, and ended up actually being pretty popular going into junior high through high school.
Very glad I lost my temper and ended that whole bullying thing.
Gay bullying ended in ninth grade for some reason, in tenth grade everybody started coming out. One of the best things about living in NYC is how supportive people are if you're gay or bi.
How old are you?
I don't think it was always this way
Interesting I think high school is worse because they can do more damage. My sister was bullied so badly in high school that she ended up having to switch schools and even then the girls wouldn't leave her alone. She ended up having to get a restraining order against these girls and the judge let the girls have it when they went to court.
A member of my family attending a well known suburban Phila school district quit in her senior year because of bullying. She was physically attacked and arrested when she fought back. After repeated attacks she quit in fear for her life.
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A member of my family attending a well known suburban Phila school district quit in her senior year because of bullying. She was physically attacked and arrested when she fought back. After repeated attacks she quit in fear for her life.
