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I'll let DubbleT answer the cleavage question, since you asked her, but I will say sexual harassment has NOTHING to do with what the girls are wearing!
You would be a good person to answer my question then. How much cleavage should be acceptable for a well-endowed teenager to show at school? I'm dealing with girls who are often busting out of low-cut tops or who are wearing midriff tops that show their navel piercings. These are in violation of the district dress code that states that no part of the breast or midriff should be exposed.
As a mother, what do you teach your daughter about modesty when she is so well-endowed? What do you tell her to do when men leer and make comments about her breasts?
The boys (and some of the men) at our school are treated to a parade of girls who do let it all hang out, so you have to draw the line somewhere. I'm fine with the line being no visible cleavage at school. What they wear outside of school is not my business. At school, I am expected to ensure that there is no sexual harassment, which is difficult when the students' clothing is so revealing.
If I go to Target and buy her a t-shirt in the right size most of her breast is covered. I'm fine with a little cleavage, a little curvature that shows she's female and does have the breast God gave her. I'd be fine with these http://styleinspirations..jpg Clothes and Wardrobe from TV
but not so much this Clothes and Wardrobe from TV
Guess it's kind of like porn for me, you know it when you see it. A little bit of bare skin does not equal porn, nor does a little bit of cleavage equal a tramp, lol
I taught her to be modest in the same way I would have taught her if she were not so well endowed, respect yourself, dress appropriately for the setting. I don't expect her to dress like a schoolmarm just because of her bust size though.
As far as what do I tell her about men and boys leering at her, well the same thing I tell her when she wears a turtle neck or anything else. Her breasts are large, guys look no matter what she wears. It's the body she was given and she doesn't need to be ashamed of it and try to hide under baggy shirts just because idiots will be idiots.
Count me out for the ****-shaming. The student should not have been forced to wear clothing emblazoned with her violation. In my opinion, she should have been given the option of calling her mother for a change of clothing and received an unexcused absence for the classes she missed. The school claims they gave her that option, but she chose the shame suit. Yeah, right. Stories like this make me so grateful for our outstanding local high school, where the students are treated like young adults, and administrators act like administrators, not wardens.
The school did give her the option.I think the issue is that the girl knew she could milk it.You see,by calling home 'daddy' knows she did something she's not supposed to.As it is 'daddy' thinks his baby girl was the victim.I'm sure she now has a few shiny new toys to play with at home from her father(The mother is either being lied to or taught the girl to act that way).
When my kids were in HS they had to turn their tshirt inside out of it was inappropriate, or get something to cover it up, or put on some random shirt the office had.
Although I know for a fact that my eldests class would have considered a "shame suit" a badge of honor and would have gone out of their way to get to wear it. The class of '05 was one crazy bunch!
I can see why she was upset though, it's tough enough being the new girl without something like this. I'm surprised by the administration to be honest.
Rules are rules.New or not(though I'm sure she knew about it before hand).Its like the law,it doesn't matter if you didn't know it was the law,you break it you get punished.
The girl is in high school-The administrators did their job well.I'm not sure if you realize it but their are neighborhoods in America were you wear a skirt at all and your liable to be raped.Their goal is to protect the girl,not hurt her.Its like a dog with a shock collar- the shock might hurt a bit but I'm sure getting hit by a car hurts a lot worse.A little emotional pain now saves her from far worse pain down the road.
Besides,is it really in the new girls best interest to make all the other kids think she's a sl*t?
Children can be vicious,especially when the only adults around can't do anything to control them.Trust me when I say they can't.I live in a small town in Florida.The kids who I went to school with?They would have torn her apart for being stupid,much less insulting the teachers(The students like the teachers because the teachers let them get away with hitting each other upside the head with textbooks,so they want to keep the teachers.Trying to get the teachers fired works against that-I'd say the girl would be lucky to make it a week without bruises).
Oh,and to those who are saying otherwise: I know large breasts can be covered easily.I have breasts that are large,and I keep them covered.In florida.In the summer when its 100 degrees out.I also wear a jacket out,despite it being 100 degrees out because I respect myself enough to keep my privates bits private.
and Yes,showing breasts does increase the risk of sexual harassment for one reason and one reason alone:
If it looks like a sl*t people think it is a sl*t.
The school did give her the option.I think the issue is that the girl knew she could milk it.You see,by calling home 'daddy' knows she did something she's not supposed to.As it is 'daddy' thinks his baby girl was the victim.I'm sure she now has a few shiny new toys to play with at home from her father(The mother is either being lied to or taught the girl to act that way).
That is debatable. I choose to believe the teen. You clearly don't. Not interested in arguing with you. We disagree. Shrug.
Oh,and to those who are saying otherwise: I know large breasts can be covered easily.I have breasts that are large,and I keep them covered.In florida.In the summer when its 100 degrees out.I also wear a jacket out,despite it being 100 degrees out because I respect myself enough to keep my privates bits private.
and Yes,showing breasts does increase the risk of sexual harassment for one reason and one reason alone:
If it looks like a sl*t people think it is a sl*t.
Ummm yes large breast CAN be covered, but why should they have to be? A little bit of cleavage is an entirely different matter than letting it all hang out on display and there is no reason anyone should have to dress like a nun so that they won't be considered a ****. Has nobody heard of moderation? It doesn't have to be an all or nothing display, sheesh. They aren't shameful and don't need to be completely hidden from view because some people don't know how to deal with them.
How about we teach the men and boys that women do in fact have breasts and that they should still treat women with respect anyway? Sorry, but my son was raised with that respect and he doesn't go around salivating every time he sees a bit of 'boobage'.
If I go to Target and buy her a t-shirt in the right size most of her breast is covered. I'm fine with a little cleavage, a little curvature that shows she's female and does have the breast God gave her. I'd be fine with these http://styleinspirations..jpg Clothes and Wardrobe from TV
but not so much this Clothes and Wardrobe from TV
Guess it's kind of like porn for me, you know it when you see it. A little bit of bare skin does not equal porn, nor does a little bit of cleavage equal a tramp, lol
I taught her to be modest in the same way I would have taught her if she were not so well endowed, respect yourself, dress appropriately for the setting. I don't expect her to dress like a schoolmarm just because of her bust size though.
As far as what do I tell her about men and boys leering at her, well the same thing I tell her when she wears a turtle neck or anything else. Her breasts are large, guys look no matter what she wears. It's the body she was given and she doesn't need to be ashamed of it and try to hide under baggy shirts just because idiots will be idiots.
The last link you gave showed a low-cut top, but there's not much cleavage with an A cup size. I regularly have to deal with young ladies who are D-cup or larger busting out of their low-cut tee shirts with 3 or more inches of cleavage pushing out of bras that are too tight. (It's worse when they come back from maternity leave.) When I mention sexual harassment, I don't mean that these young ladies are the victims. I'm more concerned about the students who don't want to see it any more than I do. I have the right to work in a non-hostile work environment just as the students do.
These What Not to Wear to School photos are more like what I see every day, but in bigger sizes. The current trend is to wear tights with no tunic overgarment. There is an ugly expression that is used to describe the impression they accent. Think of the Geico Humpday commercial. I wish I could show you our students' Facebook photos, but that would not be appropriate.
I think it is important to teach students that different environments call for different dress. Just as most people wouldn't wear a cocktail dress to a baptism, beach clothes and pyjamas are not for school. That is what we had to deal with while we were trying to re-establish our dress code. We aren't there yet, but I haven't seen any fuzzy slippers this week. I have seen lots of pierced belly buttons, which I could do without. Clearly I'm in the minority when it comes to the definition of modesty at school.
Don't even get me started on boys showing their manhoods.
The argument from that covering up is because you find your body shameful is getting so old. That's not why most people who cover up cover up. We do it because we don't think our body is for the entire world to see and don't want to put it on display. You don't have to wear a turtleneck or dress like a nun in order to cover up large breasts, either.
These What Not to Wear to School photos are more like what I see every day, but in bigger sizes. The current trend is to wear tights with no tunic overgarment. There is an ugly expression that is used to describe the impression they accent. Think of the Geico Humpday commercial. I wish I could show you our students' Facebook photos, but that would not be appropriate.
Interesting how there's more rules for the girls than the boys. Then again, it seems like most boys would be perfectly happy wearing jeans and a t-shirt for their entire life.
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