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I think it's a generational thing and I don't see what you see now as a high school teacher. I went to high school in the mid and late 90s and it was very risky to attend homecoming, sadie hawkins or prom without a date or go with a group of friends. I've been a high school teacher for now 17 years and overwhelmingly more often than not kids at my school (1,900 plus) go as friends or as a group to these dance / social functions. It's as if they want to "keep their options open" haha or at the least not seem like a "loser" who has zero friends. Either that or they have actually have listened to us who went to school 20 years ago and none of us ended up with our high school sweetheart or prom date haha.
I'll take a stab at the historical purpose of these social events. Probably some time after WWII and in the 1950s the Prom concept came of modern age or at least the concept we know today. The 50s and early 60s promoted dating norms of having one steady girl and one steady guy who you attended social functions with. As a result that norm became function tradition and today it continues as far as expectation to a degree but maybe not in terms of reality. Like I said more and more kids it seems attend in groups of friends or come by themselves. At least as far as I have witnessed.
Interestingly enough Prom in my time (late 90s) represented the last time you and your high school SO would ever be well SO's haha. You might continue your relationship into the summer but as soon as you set foot on campus as a college freshman you forgot his or her name haha. I lost count the number of couples I went to school with, some who dated 2-3 years in high school only to "suddenly" break up not too terribly long after prom senior year.
My own mom and dad went to the same high school (class of '67), went to the same prom (with different people) and eventually ended up together. Went to the same school, same prom, never danced with each other at prom, ended up getting married 2 years later mid way through college haha.
My mother graduated from HS in 1938 and they had a prom.
At my HS in 1967, you had to have a date for prom. I did hear of some other schools in the area (Pittsburgh suburbs) allowing people to go "stag". However, that was about the only dance they had at school. We had no homecoming (no one left my little mill town, I guess, so no one to "come home"), no "Winter Ball", etc. At my kids' school in the late 90s, early 00s, dates were optional. Senior prom did appear to be more of a date event, but not the other dances.
Oh....you mean in the old days before gay students could go? I never heard of that....when I went to high school, anybody could ask anyone for all dances. I never asked a guy to any dance....they asked me...BUT, some of my friends did. You could also ask just a friend. It was all very open.
My HS had a lesbian cheerleading captain in 1993-94. We thought that was slightly novel, but I don’t think we thought it was odd for a girl to ask a guy to a dance. I think friends asked people to dances too. My sister was a little younger and had friends ask her to go to dances with them. It was not a big deal. I think she went to someone’s prom as a friend.
Location: As of 2022….back to SoCal. OC this time!
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Originally Posted by RamenAddict
My HS had a lesbian cheerleading captain in 1993-94. We thought that was slightly novel, but I don’t think we thought it was odd for a girl to ask a guy to a dance. I think friends asked people to dances too. My sister was a little younger and had friends ask her to go to dances with them. It was not a big deal. I think she went to someone’s prom as a friend.
I totally get how that would be novel in 1993....specially in cheerleading! I graduated almost 15 yrs after you tho... & we kinda looked at it as somebody was bi or still questioning or experimenting. I don't remember anybody labeling themselves as a lesbian yet....tho maybe that's because I didn't happen to know or be super close friends with anybody that did. My fiance is older than me & he doesn't remember any same gender couples at dances.
It was all very open tho when I went to HS...AND....it isn't like if they were gay they had a big pool of dates to pick from for a school dance anyways, you know? So they probably went with a friend more than the rest of us so they didn't miss out.
Prom & a couple of dances for the year was the only times it was a school event that was couple centric IMO. You were still around friends but most had a "date" or a friend that was their date. The rest of the time school events were not couple centric....even tho some kids would sit with their friends AND their Bf or Gf at games.
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