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Old 05-07-2008, 12:24 PM
 
31 posts, read 91,318 times
Reputation: 29

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I demand respect as a parent. I demand my child respect teachers. If my child complains about a grade, I first tell her to talk with the teacher. Usually, she knows what the teacher is going to say.

I am a Grandmother raising her grandchild since 1yr and now she is 14. The other side, my child is dyslexic and it has been a tough year from the beginning. The Science teacher is a later in life after retirement licensed teacher. I only say this because he is 73 and he told us about his work life at the first open house. I thought that was great he could get back into making a living by teaching after retirement.

Quickly I found out he was a black and white kind of teacher. He tried to teach well, I know he did. Being his first year ever teaching, it was a hard breaking in time for him. I realized this. My granddaughter has an iep and must have her work modified plus be allowed to leave the classroom to get help.

My granddaughter complained constantly with valid points at the beginning of the year. Her work was not being modified according to her iep. I had 8 emails and 2 phone conversations with her Science teacher about the modification. Making it clear he must by her IEP. Well, After the first 7 or so weeks I called an high priority meeting. As I sat across the table with the Science teacher and the LD instructor, the Science teacher said my granddaughter was not finishing her work on time or turning it in. I looked straight into his face and told him to "get this through his thick head..... My granddaughter has an IEP and you MUST work with it. If you don't she will fail and you are not teaching according to the educational law."

It is not that I disliked this man, but just the opposite. I understood him completely. I did like his strict manner but it was so hard for him to get it. He was one who just thought every child could and should learn the way he taught. My granddaughter asked to be moved. I refused because I wanted her to learn how to get along and to communicate with people like her Science teacher. She likes him but she also respect him more so now because there was NO WAY OUT for her. I do think it is so hard teaching and following different ways of teaching. I do have respect and have sympathy for teachers and what they have to put up with. For Christmas, my daughter made each teacher a special bookmark. She has been drawing and painting since 4 yrs. so her skills are very good. Her Science teacher's bookmark was totally awesome. This was a great effort on my granddaughters part because she could have made a crappy one.

Teachers have a big load on their shoulders. I respect them and wish there were a better way of renewing their spirits several times a year. I think they should go to camp where their needs are met and they can learn to deal with the daily work load.

Parents should always stop and think about both sides. Try and reason out events and the possible problems that could come from it.

The child today is not the child of yesterday. Our children are out of control. They murder class mates, teachers and beat up on others and more. This is a direct result of catering to the so called rights of a child that has not earned the RIGHT or achieved the level of understanding of respect.

The Science teacher problems have worked themselves out and my granddaughter only complains IF she is not GUILTY!!! She knows I will find out the truth. She knows not to alarm me with false claims. If she does, I have her attend the face to face meeting. Twice she have been in the right, and once she has been wrong and she felt about as high as a piece of dirt. It shamed her to get scolded and grounded in front of the teacher team by me. Guess what, she respects me more, her teachers more and has a better understanding of her rights as a responsible student.

To much crying and screaming foul in our so called freedom of speech.

Okay, I'll get off my soapbox.
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Old 05-07-2008, 05:49 PM
 
1,650 posts, read 3,659,986 times
Reputation: 1128
Quote:
Originally Posted by okie1954 View Post
I demand respect as a parent. I demand my child respect teachers. If my child complains about a grade, I first tell her to talk with the teacher. Usually, she knows what the teacher is going to say.

I am a Grandmother raising her grandchild since 1yr and now she is 14. The other side, my child is dyslexic and it has been a tough year from the beginning. The Science teacher is a later in life after retirement licensed teacher. I only say this because he is 73 and he told us about his work life at the first open house. I thought that was great he could get back into making a living by teaching after retirement.

Quickly I found out he was a black and white kind of teacher. He tried to teach well, I know he did. Being his first year ever teaching, it was a hard breaking in time for him. I realized this. My granddaughter has an iep and must have her work modified plus be allowed to leave the classroom to get help.

My granddaughter complained constantly with valid points at the beginning of the year. Her work was not being modified according to her iep. I had 8 emails and 2 phone conversations with her Science teacher about the modification. Making it clear he must by her IEP. Well, After the first 7 or so weeks I called an high priority meeting. As I sat across the table with the Science teacher and the LD instructor, the Science teacher said my granddaughter was not finishing her work on time or turning it in. I looked straight into his face and told him to "get this through his thick head..... My granddaughter has an IEP and you MUST work with it. If you don't she will fail and you are not teaching according to the educational law."

It is not that I disliked this man, but just the opposite. I understood him completely. I did like his strict manner but it was so hard for him to get it. He was one who just thought every child could and should learn the way he taught. My granddaughter asked to be moved. I refused because I wanted her to learn how to get along and to communicate with people like her Science teacher. She likes him but she also respect him more so now because there was NO WAY OUT for her. I do think it is so hard teaching and following different ways of teaching. I do have respect and have sympathy for teachers and what they have to put up with. For Christmas, my daughter made each teacher a special bookmark. She has been drawing and painting since 4 yrs. so her skills are very good. Her Science teacher's bookmark was totally awesome. This was a great effort on my granddaughters part because she could have made a crappy one.

Teachers have a big load on their shoulders. I respect them and wish there were a better way of renewing their spirits several times a year. I think they should go to camp where their needs are met and they can learn to deal with the daily work load.

Parents should always stop and think about both sides. Try and reason out events and the possible problems that could come from it.

The child today is not the child of yesterday. Our children are out of control. They murder class mates, teachers and beat up on others and more. This is a direct result of catering to the so called rights of a child that has not earned the RIGHT or achieved the level of understanding of respect.

The Science teacher problems have worked themselves out and my granddaughter only complains IF she is not GUILTY!!! She knows I will find out the truth. She knows not to alarm me with false claims. If she does, I have her attend the face to face meeting. Twice she have been in the right, and once she has been wrong and she felt about as high as a piece of dirt. It shamed her to get scolded and grounded in front of the teacher team by me. Guess what, she respects me more, her teachers more and has a better understanding of her rights as a responsible student.

To much crying and screaming foul in our so called freedom of speech.

Okay, I'll get off my soapbox.
I wish every parent had the same respect for teachers that you do. It is good that you are involved and concerned about her education.
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Old 05-07-2008, 07:08 PM
 
44 posts, read 212,390 times
Reputation: 24
Okie 1954,

As a parent and a teacher working with "at risk" students, I applaud you! I see many grandparents raising their grandchildren these days. This is a difficult job and it sounds like you are doing a great job!!

I wish more parents/grandparents in our area were involved and concerned with their childrens education.

Something as simple as reading a book one-on-one with a child for 20 minutes a day can make a world of difference - both to that child and to their education.

Keep on caring!
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Old 05-08-2008, 10:07 AM
 
28,900 posts, read 50,396,604 times
Reputation: 46370
You should probably shoot him.
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Old 05-08-2008, 03:20 PM
 
Location: Home!
9,093 posts, read 11,111,184 times
Reputation: 8933
Quote:
Originally Posted by cpg35223 View Post
You should probably shoot him.

Okaaaay~that was random.


To the OP:
I think it is a great post and you should run for an office that will hear and heed you! I would vote for you!!!!
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Old 05-10-2008, 05:11 AM
 
Location: In the sticks of Illinois
498 posts, read 1,448,215 times
Reputation: 163
Smile Unite

Quote:
Originally Posted by okie1954 View Post
I demand respect as a parent. I demand my child respect teachers. If my child complains about a grade, I first tell her to talk with the teacher. Usually, she knows what the teacher is going to say.

I am a Grandmother raising her grandchild since 1yr and now she is 14. The other side, my child is dyslexic and it has been a tough year from the beginning. The Science teacher is a later in life after retirement licensed teacher. I only say this because he is 73 and he told us about his work life at the first open house. I thought that was great he could get back into making a living by teaching after retirement.

Quickly I found out he was a black and white kind of teacher. He tried to teach well, I know he did. Being his first year ever teaching, it was a hard breaking in time for him. I realized this. My granddaughter has an iep and must have her work modified plus be allowed to leave the classroom to get help.

My granddaughter complained constantly with valid points at the beginning of the year. Her work was not being modified according to her iep. I had 8 emails and 2 phone conversations with her Science teacher about the modification. Making it clear he must by her IEP. Well, After the first 7 or so weeks I called an high priority meeting. As I sat across the table with the Science teacher and the LD instructor, the Science teacher said my granddaughter was not finishing her work on time or turning it in. I looked straight into his face and told him to "get this through his thick head..... My granddaughter has an IEP and you MUST work with it. If you don't she will fail and you are not teaching according to the educational law."

It is not that I disliked this man, but just the opposite. I understood him completely. I did like his strict manner but it was so hard for him to get it. He was one who just thought every child could and should learn the way he taught. My granddaughter asked to be moved. I refused because I wanted her to learn how to get along and to communicate with people like her Science teacher. She likes him but she also respect him more so now because there was NO WAY OUT for her. I do think it is so hard teaching and following different ways of teaching. I do have respect and have sympathy for teachers and what they have to put up with. For Christmas, my daughter made each teacher a special bookmark. She has been drawing and painting since 4 yrs. so her skills are very good. Her Science teacher's bookmark was totally awesome. This was a great effort on my granddaughters part because she could have made a crappy one.

Teachers have a big load on their shoulders. I respect them and wish there were a better way of renewing their spirits several times a year. I think they should go to camp where their needs are met and they can learn to deal with the daily work load.

Parents should always stop and think about both sides. Try and reason out events and the possible problems that could come from it.

The child today is not the child of yesterday. Our children are out of control. They murder class mates, teachers and beat up on others and more. This is a direct result of catering to the so called rights of a child that has not earned the RIGHT or achieved the level of understanding of respect.

The Science teacher problems have worked themselves out and my granddaughter only complains IF she is not GUILTY!!! She knows I will find out the truth. She knows not to alarm me with false claims. If she does, I have her attend the face to face meeting. Twice she have been in the right, and once she has been wrong and she felt about as high as a piece of dirt. It shamed her to get scolded and grounded in front of the teacher team by me. Guess what, she respects me more, her teachers more and has a better understanding of her rights as a responsible student.

To much crying and screaming foul in our so called freedom of speech.

Okay, I'll get off my soapbox.

Okie, you are so right. I don't know where or when it happened, but why are people brainwashed into thinking that their child has to be happy 24/7? I do not send my child to school to be happy, I send him to get an informed ACADEMIC EDUCATION. Nothing more, nothing less.
I also am for the teachers. That person is giving them something that not every body can. THeir (the teachers) intelligence. I tell my kid, to go in sit down and keep your mouth shut and do your work. I also tell him to be helpful. Ask those teachers if he can do anything for them. Coaches and administration are in the way of ALL ACADEMICS AND ARTS, EDUCATION in the k-12 public schools.ACADEMIC TEACHERS can't get good money because the coach/teachers are eating all that up. Revenue? WHere? Prove IT> More goes out to sports than ACADEMICS all day long.
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Old 05-24-2008, 07:41 AM
 
31 posts, read 91,318 times
Reputation: 29
The thing about all of this, we have to continue to find a balance in self education for ourselves and for our children. Keeping up with what is going on in our child's life and in the class rooms is a job that demands constant questioning. I question my child on her day at school. She talks and whines and sometimes cry. I sympathize, listen and respond. I have noticed she is complaining less over the last month. I think she is beginning to deal with some small issues on her own and work things out. That is good for this grandma . I do try to be as neutral as possible about the story because I am getting one side of it. She can sometimes be a bit off and dramatic at least once a month. This is the only she is difficult to reason with. But, that is over rather quickly.

She also talks with me about sex things. There are so many wrong kinds of information she is getting it is astonishing. I have to set her straight. Here is one and its funny. She loved hotdogs and ate them frequently until a class mate told her they were pig penises. yep, boy I laughed and laughed about that one. I explained what they were and made off. Well, she hardly touches them now. So, that is okay they have way to much sodium in them.

It has taken a life time for me to get to this point and to be calm but I am glad to be here.

There's just no substitute for age and maturity. Youngsters should listen to us more often.
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Old 05-24-2008, 09:51 AM
 
Location: Camberville
14,041 posts, read 18,961,171 times
Reputation: 24446
Is this thread serious? I see nothing positive about the OP. The teacher DID NOT FOLLOW THE IEP! What is there to respect about that? Nothing. He's a bad teacher, nothing more, nothing less. I don't care if he's not used to teaching children with different teaching styles- that's a core part of being a teacher! Respect is earned, not given, and it doesn't seem like this teacher did anything to earn respect.

Also, humiliating your granddaughter in front of her teachers? That's a way to lose respect as well. It's one thing to punish her- it's another to do it in front of her teachers. She won't remember the punishment but she will ALWAYS remember that she was humiliated by an adult and that's it's completely alright to humiliate other people in front of their superiors or peers.

I give a great deal higher baseline of respect to teachers- and always have. However, the fact that this teacher ignored your emails and phone calls shows that HE'S in the wrong. Even though is appears that he is following the IEP now, once you start falling behind in science, it's tough to get back on the horse. So in essence, your granddaughter's education got jipped. That's not something I would take so lightly. I had unofficial IEPs in lieu of skipping a grade in middle school and routinely had teachers refuse to let me leave the classroom or make accommodations that the administration was requiring for me. Why should I have respected those teachers? Not that I ever showed them that I thought they were worthless, but here I am 10 years remembering the bad teachers with disdain just as much as I treasure the good teachers.
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Old 05-25-2008, 08:42 PM
 
Location: S. New Hampshire
909 posts, read 3,178,028 times
Reputation: 537
If I read the OP correctly, she is trying to teach her granddaughter to respect the person in charge. That doesn't necessarily mean that you have to believe this person is in the right, in fact, she has stated that he didn't do what he was supposed to do (follow the IEP). But as long as the granddaughter is in the class she has to continue plugging away. And the OP did tell the teacher to his face he wasn't doing what he was supposed to do.

I think you probably disagree with the OP's parenting style, which of course you are free to do. But I think the value in all of this is that the OP is trying to teach her granddaughter a lesson of life. Sometimes there are knuckleheads in charge and sometimes you have to suck it up and work with that. She went to bat for her granddaughter, but didn't let up one bit on what her personal responsibility in this situations was/is. And I think very highly of that.

In all my years of schooling, my dad went to bat for me only once, because he truly thought there was an error in the way the teacher was grading tests. He couldn't get through to the teacher, so I was just stuck with it until the end of the semester. Otherwise, I was just told, you're going to have to figure out how to succeed anyway. Now I was never in danger of flunking or anything like that, but I knew that if I wanted the grade I was going to have to work extra for it. That's life. Not always fair, but nobody ever said life was fair.
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Old 05-26-2008, 06:37 AM
 
2,838 posts, read 9,519,790 times
Reputation: 2936
I actually have to agree with charolastra00 (I think this is a first! LOL) on this one. This teacher sounds like a real jerk, and in the "real world," your granddaughter would have the option of going above her supervisor's head if he was acting against company policy, or even finding a new job. I would not want to work somewhere where I cried most days because my boss was an arrogant fool who refused to work with me... I would be submitting my resume to other companies asap. It is sad that children are expected to put up with bullying and rudeness from teachers, in the name of "preparing them for life." "Real life" is not like that! I don't know if the point is to create submissive and compliant adults, or what, but in my opinion, it's unacceptable.

Of course we all have to deal with difficulties in life, but when someone is obviously exploiting his power over a child by not following protocol and purposely making things difficult for her, it's gone too far. Children do not have to be happy every minute, but they should at least be respected as people. If you would not stand for that sort of treatment for yourself, then you should not stand for it for your children. And I would hope that you would not stand for that for yourself!
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