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Old 07-07-2023, 05:29 PM
 
12,514 posts, read 8,731,743 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by rabbit33 View Post
Well, they're real "sweet" unless they smell weakness, then it's like a pack of wolves, going after the insecure or uncertain or different one.

Sorry, but children are not all sweet and caring until they've been taught.
Some are like a pack of wolves. And yet some seem to be natural born sheepdogs.
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Old 07-07-2023, 05:38 PM
 
16,807 posts, read 16,043,838 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by rabbit33 View Post
Well, they're real "sweet" unless they smell weakness, then it's like a pack of wolves, going after the insecure or uncertain or different one.

Sorry, but children are not all sweet and caring until they've been taught.
Nah. If the class has a halfway decent teacher there is none of that BS. Not in K.

True story - one of my boys was pushed down on the playground when he was in K and the little boy who pushed him proceeded to shove rubber mulch in his mouth. When the teacher called me to tell me what had happened I was in absolute shock. My boys were always among the taller ones their class so I wouldn't have expected one of them to be targeted like that.

That was when I started to volunteer in that classroom. Imagine my shock when I saw my son seated right next to the kid who had pushed him. At the same time, I knew and respected his teacher's judgement on this. So I sat and watched the kids interact while I doled out supplies and answered questions about the craft they were doing. My son was helping that boy and that boy had a funny sense of humor that was cracking my son up. Wut??

The bully in question was a short little guy who had not had much opportunity to attend preschool or play with other children. He wasn't a bad kid, after all.

By the end of the year he and my son were buddies. Crazy but true.
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Old 07-07-2023, 09:37 PM
 
Location: Capital Region, NY
2,382 posts, read 1,456,676 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by 1200RT View Post
One thing to add.

If you're truly on the fence - read malcolm gladwell's book Outliers. He discussed this topic in detail (with research). I'm doing this from memory - but bottom line is "older" kids are smarter (or, more fairly, more developed), bigger, stronger, etc. This is internalized and carried on into young adulthood. This is also why you're seeing it more in wealthier communities where parents try to give their kids every possible head start. Don't kill the messenger. Great book/author either way.
This.

Most kids will be fine, but some may benefit to a notable degree, especially in the early years.
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Old 07-08-2023, 07:26 AM
 
14,968 posts, read 7,015,088 times
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I feel I would have been better off waiting a year. My birthday i sin November, and I started 1st grade at age 5, as we lived in a city where the cutoff was to be 6 before December 31st. I was plenty smart, had taught myself to read at 4 and was reading 4th and 5th grade level books at 5. But, I was very introverted and immature. It didn't help that halfway through 2nd Grade my best friend and I were promoted to 3rd grade. That put me even farther behind socially. That experiment failed for several reasons, and I spent the next year in 3rd grade.
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Old 07-08-2023, 07:48 AM
 
Location: So Ca
26,534 posts, read 26,312,780 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by thinkalot View Post
Then explain the millions that started early and are successful today. I'm sure some may have had problems, but they got over them. My sister was one.
Possibly because back then, kindergartners played in the sandbox and painted; they weren't expected to write paragraphs and memorize addition and subtraction facts.

Seriously, there's no doubt that many youngest kids in the classroom do well. But there are probably far more who internalize their inability to keep up in social, emotional and educational ways, and have a hard time recovering it in later years.
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Old 07-10-2023, 07:50 AM
 
Location: Sunnybrook Farm
4,110 posts, read 2,323,024 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by springfieldva View Post
Nah. If the class has a halfway decent teacher there is none of that BS. Not in K.
...
Teachers aren't everywhere at once. Lots of stuff happens out of teacher's view. Believe me, there are plenty of children who are little angels in front of adults and then show their true colors once out of view.
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Old 07-10-2023, 08:38 AM
 
16,807 posts, read 16,043,838 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by rabbit33 View Post
Teachers aren't everywhere at once. Lots of stuff happens out of teacher's view. Believe me, there are plenty of children who are little angels in front of adults and then show their true colors once out of view.
There's usually a teacher and an assistant in K classrooms. If the teacher is occupied doing one on one reading assessments for example, the assistant will be watching and monitoring the rest of the class. They keep a pretty good eye on the kids.

Yes, it's possible for things to still happen, see my above example of my son being pushed down on the playground, but when the kids do act out like that it's usually due to a lack of socialization, impulse control, perhaps the inability to verbalize their feelings. Basically they are immature and still learning how to play.

It's like when a toddler bites another toddler at daycare. The biter isn't doing it because they are "bad kid" even though it is upsetting when something like that happens. And, certainly, as a parent you want to make sure that your child is not ever bitten again.

Last edited by springfieldva; 07-10-2023 at 10:07 AM..
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Old 07-12-2023, 11:54 AM
 
Location: North Dakota
10,169 posts, read 13,664,072 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by thtltwatw View Post
The purpose is this post is to encourage parents of kids born between October and December to think long-term when deciding whether or not to send them to kindergarten at 4. Our son has a late November birthday, and when he was 4, all that mattered to us was that he was ready for Kindergarten. We didn't ask ourselves how he would do in high school or college. Thus, we sent him at 4, and he has ultimately been emotionally damaged because of it.

Now contrary to popular opinion, he didn't feel as bad about being the last to get his driver's license as one might expect. After all, it's a hard and fast rule in this country that if you're under 16, you're now allowed a driver's license. Thus, our son knew that his classmates weren't driving before him because of anything he had done wrong; he knew that it was just the law and there was no reason for him to blame himself. However, our son experienced other problems that I'm sure were an indirect result of his relative age. However, because these problems were an indirect result, he had a much harder time not blaming himself for them.

One such example is that he didn't make it into his high school's top orchestra until his senior year, while most of his orchestra friends made it in their junior year. Concerts were torture for him his junior year, as he had to sit in the audience watching his classmates perform some of the greatest classical pieces ever written.

Another example is that he failed Pre-Calculus his junior year, and had to retake it his senior year, meaning he graduated high school with no knowledge of Calculus. Whenever he got together with his friends to study during his senior year, he had to endure the shame of pulling out his Pre-Calculus textbook while all his friends pulled out their Calculus(and in some cases, Multivariable Calculus) textbooks.

But, most recently and most importantly, is that he failed to graduate from college in 4 years. Due to his immaturity when he entered college, he wasn't able to handle as much as most of his classmates, and the result was that he ended up falling a year behind. He should've graduated this spring, but he didn't. It's going to be another year before he graduates and he is miserable about it. These past weeks, he's had to endure his friends from high school as well as his friends from his first year at the university(including his old roommates) posting pictures of themselves in their caps and gowns on facebook. The moderator of that group, the other day, made a post saying, "Congratulations college grads!" which filled our son with shame. A parent of one of his friends from high school invited them to a college graduation party at their enormous house, to which our son had to gloomily decline. Even though he's graduating next year, the people he's going to graduate with are people he barely knows, whereas most people who graduate from college together have shared the full 4 years together, from start to finish.

I've never heard a parent say they regret redshirting, but I've heard many parents say they regret not redshirting, and now I understand why.
I don't see how the third and fourth paragraph have anything to do with age. With the college example, maybe. But even if he was 17 when he entered college, how was he not ready? He lived at home for 17 years and went to school 12 years. What else do you need to get ready?
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Old 07-13-2023, 09:23 AM
 
Location: Sunny So. Cal.
4,144 posts, read 1,522,499 times
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You, and your kid, need to stop comparing him to everyone else.
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Old 07-13-2023, 05:45 PM
 
Location: Albuquerque
803 posts, read 403,366 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Slater View Post
In Tennessee way back in the 1960's a kid started first grade at age 7. I would imagine it's probably changed over the decades.
I think that was true in Texas too. I remember kids that were a year older than the rest of us who had moved from Texas.
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