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We lived in Germany for a couple of years in the mid 80's. Over there nudity is no big deal, and I had to reach my three daughters to be accepting of customs in that culture. There was a popular swimming lake off a road to our house, and the Germans parked their cars along that road and walked down to the lake. They thought nothing of coming back to their car and stripping down to the skin, right there along the road, and changing clothes. We once stopped at a gas station and a tour bus pulled into the parking lot. All the ladies went inside to pee, and all the men lined up along a fence on the edge of the parking lot and answered natures call!!! Naturally my 2 oldest daughters, older elementary school age, were howling.
I think it is s a teachable moment for your daughter. Sit her down and explain that some people feel comfortable being naked in front of other ladies in the changing room, but that's not what we do in our house. We believe....fill in the blank.
I was amused by your mention that one lady was "totally unshaven...never seen that before". Where do you live, anyway? Where I live, someone "shaven" would be the exception, not that I'd be looking.
Now for the person who bent over in their faces...just gross, and I would have said something. Some people are exhibitionists, but crude behavior is altogether different.
I think it isn't any big deal at all. The men at the swimming club I used to belong to took no special care to wrap themselves in towels, most of the men were totally naked while going about much of the time. Yes, children gawk, but it is part of growing up.
My personal view is anyone over 55 should get their own locker room.
I used to work out at a YMCA, which was the premier gym in my area. Yes, it's a locker room. People get naked and change, I did too, I understand that.
What was disgusting was the naked old men walking around the locker room, shaving, blow drying their scrotums (I kid you not) and sitting on the couches and watching TV naked.
I honestly wanted to go in there with a flamethrower some days...
Nakedness in America is so taboo. It's the human body. Human bodies come in all shapes, sizes, and states of hairiness. Not a big deal. I prefer the European model on this.
Perhaps your wife could teach your daughter to avert her eyes (she should not be staring anyway).
And if it still bothers your wife, she could take her into a bathroom stall.
This. I have never noticed the pubic hair or lack there of in any changing room.
I wouldn't walk around without a towel on, regardless of whether there were children around, but that is apparently the custom there, so it is your wife who should make different plans to avoid it.
My own feeling is that if your wife made a big deal out of it, it would be worse than if your daughter saw other females nude.
One time when our youngest son was about 6, we won some tickets to see a pro hockey game and visit the locker room after the game. My husband and son came out of the locker room, and my son's eyes were like saucers. "Mom, they were naked," he said. DH and I didn't care at all that he saw naked men. We thought it was kind of amusing.
I'd just like to ask you good people's opinions on this one.
My wife took our four year old daughter swimming a few days ago, and after swimming they went into the changing rooms to get changed. While changing, there were other women walking around the changing rooms totally naked, and not even trying to cover up in any way. My wife said our daughter looked quite shocked about seeing one that was totally unshaven, (never seen that before), and there was one that even bent down in front of them, (rear view).
My wife felt quite uncomfortable about this, and doesn't see it as appropriate for anyone to expose themselves to young children, wherever they are.
As a man, I definitely wouldn't have walked naked around the male changing rooms, and exposed myself to young children, or anyone else, come to that.
Would this be acceptable, and in your view, is it acceptable ?
Of course this is totally acceptable. We have kids in this country growing up with a very unhealthy attitude toward nudity. I have subbed for a middle school swimming class where the boys were too embarassed to change in front of other boys. They would line up to use the two bathroom stalls or change under a beach towel that they wrapped around themselves.
Does your daughter look "quite shocked" when she sees people whose hair on the top of their head is totally unshaven? Regardless of the current trend, unshaven head and pubic hair are still the norm.
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Originally Posted by SabresFanInSA
So once we weed through all of the typical City Data"holier than thou" posts I think the simple answer is that this is why there are family changing rooms. I think people figure that if you brought your child into what is a pretty open atmosphere then you were ok with it. IF that isnt the case, I agree with whomever said she should have taken them into a stall.
I think the idea behind the family changing rooms was more because of parents taking a child of the opposite sex into the lockerroom with the parent. The YMCA where I belong has showers between the lockerrom and the pool to encourage people to take showers before entering the pool. I usually don't take a shower at the Y, but I have had several instances where I was taking a shower and a guy brought his daughter through the shower room on the way to or from the pool. I think some women finally complained about other women bringing their 4-5 year old boys into the ladies' locker room and they have added a family changing room. Based on the location, however, it doesn't solve the issue since the parent will still walk their child through their locker room and shower to get to the pool.
Quote:
Originally Posted by kevxu
I think it isn't any big deal at all. The men at the swimming club I used to belong to took no special care to wrap themselves in towels, most of the men were totally naked while going about much of the time. Yes, children gawk, but it is part of growing up.
In my junior high swimming classes back in the 1960s, the teacher would tell us on the first class at the beginning of the year that bathing suits were optional. Forgetting your bathing suit was never an excuse for not taking swimming class.
I don't have kids, so I can't answer from a parent's point of view, however if I'm in a locker room and children are present, I do try to be discreet when getting changed.
We really need to stop teaching children at a young age to be ashamed of their bodies. As a shy person I found it a little uncomfortable to be in a locker room, but eventually I got over it. Nobody in the changing room is there to look at naked people they are there to change clothes. Your wife should be using that as an opportunity to teach your child how to behave in that situation (not stare) and that people come in all sorts of shapes and sizes and degrees of hairiness or lack thereof. And that all of them are perfectly okay and normal as is hers.
Running away from this situation and acting like it is somehow wrong and shameful, is going to teach her very bad lessons which could lead to some serious self image problems as she gets older.
Boy, people sure are uptight. I guess you shouldn't take her in the locker room then and expose her to things that make you uncomfortable.
I have a 7yr old. Been taking him swimming for about 3 years. Everyone walks around naked in the locker area. There's a large open room with shower heads sticking out, everyone showers naked. There's a sauna, everyone goes in there naked (including us). I mean we teach him that his body is his and some parts are private and all that but being naked among people isn't a horrifying or uncomfortable thing.
It's weird that this makes you uncomfortable. It's our normal. But hey, whatev.
I have been a member of our local YMCA since the 80's. I began there by taking my young children for swimming lessons and liked the idea well enough to join and have a place to workout and swim during the winter months while the children were at school.
Initially I was in the general locker rooms and although it was a new facility there was not a convenient way to shower after being in the pool (and washing and shampooing the chlorine off of ones skin and out of the hair) without getting back to the locker room in a clothed manner without putting ones suit back on; rather counterproductive in my view. The little girls were not the issue as they seemed to have taken nudity in stride, however, some of the mothers were, in my opinion, the 'difficulty'.
After a month or so of disapproving looks from 'some' mothers I did join the 'gold club'' where no one under the age of 18 years old is allowed; now that I am "over 55" I remain there for the same reason. FWIW, the costs are considerably higher and it seems to me that I am paying extra so as not to offend the delicate sensibilities of fragile natures. After all, it is indeed a locker room, just my experience and simple minded POV.
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