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What I am about to share with everybody is very personal and it is 100% true. It is a somewhat long post so those who have the patience to read thank you very much. On december 10 2018 I began falling into a very dark place in my life. Triggered by a friend's cancer wdiagnosis and self awareness about a condition I have I began experiencing a combination of fear, stress, anxiety and depression. It was a terrifying experience. It progressed so fast that I had no time to process it. It came out of nowhere? Within a week I was a total emotional and phsycological wreck. I went from a very motivated and level headed man to and absolute mess. I hated myself and didn't recognized the man in the mirror. I thought I was dying and had very little time left. I had no health insurance and we were not in good shape financially so going to the doctor was difficult so I didn't which made things worse because I had to keep living with the uncertainty. I began reviewing my life's desicions and began regretting things and apologizing to my family repeatedly.
My wife and kids saw firsthand how I quiclky deteriorated and fell apart. They had never seen me that way. I abandoned everything I loved to do including fitness and social life. I barely exercised in 5 months. I didn't go out for 5 months either except for work and was absolutely necessary. The rest of the time I was holed up at home crying and feelling like crap. I turned down invitations to guys night out with friends several times. Going to work was a nightmare. I didn't want to talk to anyone or be seen. I barely called my dad because I did not know how to tell him what I was going through. I was afraid to eat. I cut so many things out of my diet that I was miserable. I lost about 20 pounds in a month. My strength went down my confidence was gone I felt lightheaded at times. It was terrible. People started noticing my weight loss and that made me feel worse. Some days I thought I would never smile again But along the way the love of my family and friends help me keep going. My wife was great and patient. I finally registered with the VA which allowed me medical care after 3 months and underwent some exams. They said I was suffering from moderate to severe depression and my symptoms were elevated. I have never suffered from depression before but I think I had some PTSD. They gave me some medication but I refused to take it because I wanted to beat it on my own. I also opened up to my dad and my brother and they were very supportive.
After almost 5 months during a video call with my brother I broke down and he used a little tough love and gave me the push that I needed. The next nght I began training again and slowly eating things that I had not had in months. My strenght started returning and so did my confidence. I was on a mission to beat what was happening to me. It was like I had been hibernating and woke up. The exams came back and it turned out I was ok. Today I feel fine again and I am training like I used to. I will be 50 in July and hope to be in good shape for my birthday. The love of my family and friends gave me hope but it was Fitness that gave me the power to overcome my crisis and come out of that very dark place. Fitness helped save my life and save me from myself and because of that I will always exercise and try my best to stay fit. I Have so much newfound respect and sympathy for those who struggle with depression. If you are experiencing anything similar to what happened to me please reach out to someone. Don't hide and give up. The mind can be very dark and cruel and it can hurt you badly. Thanks a lot to whoever read this long post and if you have a similar story. I would like to hear it. You might help someone out there who is struggling right now.
Thanks for sharing. I have been through times like that. I am now 70 y.o., female, and was depressed for various reasons last year. The mind is can be our worst enemy. I ended up in the hospital with a life threatening blood clot. Praise be, I completely recovered (I almost died) and vowed from then on to get my life and health back, and I have. Made a complete recovery, and now enjoy many things I had given up - bike riding, belly dancing, walking, and strength training. Part of this was we made a major move, which was very difficult especially during my recovery; but we did it. My depression and anxiety is pretty much gone.
Good for you for taking control! And there is always support out there.
Thanks for sharing. I have been through times like that. I am now 70 y.o., female, and was depressed for various reasons last year. The mind is can be our worst enemy. I ended up in the hospital with a life threatening blood clot. Praise be, I completely recovered (I almost died) and vowed from then on to get my life and health back, and I have. Made a complete recovery, and now enjoy many things I had given up - bike riding, belly dancing, walking, and strength training. Part of this was we made a major move, which was very difficult especially during my recovery; but we did it. My depression and anxiety is pretty much gone.
Good for you for taking control! And there is always support out there.
Thanks a lot and I am glad you pushed through. Staying fit and healthy is a journey and it requires commitment but it is worth the effort.
That is great for you! I'm always glad to read an uplifting story.
I can't say I have a similar story, but I recently returned to the gym after 4 years off. I had a good routine going for quite a while, then 4 years ago I changed jobs. While it was a great career move, it also meant an earlier start time and longer commute, both of which impacted my early morning workout routine. I adjusted and kept up my gym routine at first; then I came down with a bad case of the flu, fell off the horse, and never returned. A few months later my wife gave birth to our second child. All of these changes in life caused me to drop this from my routine.
I recently decided to I really need to get back into better physical health. I'm 37, still fairly young, but I went to head off potential health issues before they become real problems. My cholesterol is higher than it should be at 210, blood pressure is okay, 118/62 at my last visit. I have also noticed a bit more soreness in my joints lately, particularly my knees and my lower back. My wife also tells me I have been snoring more lately, something that doesn't happen when I am in better shape.
I'm 5'10 and ~205 pounds. While I would like to lose some of that weight, weight loss isn't my primary goal, overall health is. I want to be healthy not only for myself, but for my family. I also want to begin setting a better example for my children. I know nutrition is also part of that. We do eat fairly healthy meals as a family, and we don't let the kids snack on a lot of junk. The problem is that I tend to snack on junk after the kids are in bed. That's a habit I have been working on curbing...
It has been scientifically proven that exercise and eating enough vegetables is good for your brain chemistry. That is probably why so many people have problems today. Our food is horrible and our jobs all have us sitting down for extremely long periods of time. Uphill battle.
That was very motivating. I wouldn't be surprised if your testimony changed a life or two.
I believe in the forces of good and evil. I believe SOMETIMES the evil forces try to destroy us. You, my friend, are a survivor.
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