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What do you think of this? Sure, I have a lot of weight to lose and, in a sense, it does make me accountable. For example, I finally weighed myself today. Would this bug you? I know he has my best interest at heart, but he is going to keep tabs on this. I joined the gym on Saturday so have no excuse to continue to be this weight. Thoughts?
That sounds like a recipe for disaster to me - and like he's being controlling, which would more than bug me. The point is for YOU to take ownership of your own weight loss or any project (self improvement or otherwise) that you might pursue. He should not be directing how that happens. He should be there to support you according to your wishes and style. Some people like reminders and someone to be accountable to - others resent that kind of interaction.
When I wanted to lose some weight a few years ago, I told my husband so he would be aware and sensitive to it. I asked him to remind me to drink water if he noticed that I wasn't staying hydrated - and also asked him NOT to comment on what I was eating (whether it was too much or too little or not appropriate or whatever - NO food comments). He was fantastic through the whole experience and I've kept most of the weight off.
I did the weight watchers program. It requires participants to weigh in every week - that was good accountability for me because it wasn't personal, it was more like business or school. They have meetings you can go to if you want. I didn't do that but others got a lot out of it - it is a non-competitive support system of people going through the same thing. Personally, I don't like that kind of competition or to be coached hard - it de-motivates me. Others thrive in that kind of environment, though, so you should do what works for you.
Is "HE" your doctor? Boyfriend? Husband? You didnt make that clear in your post. If "HE" is your boyfriend and this makes you feel uncomfortable you need to tell him. However, if this "HE" is your doctor or husband then I think you should understand that its coming from a different viewpoint and that you should be a bit more open about it. Especially if its your husband who has nothing but your best interest in mind.
After my wife gave birth to our daughter, I think she got up to like 160 or more pounds. So I put together a spreadsheet to track her exercises and weight loss until she got back down to her "normal" weight. At first she was a bit hesitant to "check in" but once she started doing it, the motivating factor of seeing her progress just snowballed into her wanting to workout more (as in do different types of workouts), eat right and she actually looked forward to her twice weekly weigh ins and exercise updates. She enjoyed it so much, that she now has keeps her own spreadsheet/log to keep track of her weight/exercises/workouts.
Is "HE" your doctor? Boyfriend? Husband? You didnt make that clear in your post. If "HE" is your boyfriend and this makes you feel uncomfortable you need to tell him. However, if this "HE" is your doctor or husband then I think you should understand that its coming from a different viewpoint and that you should be a bit more open about it. Especially if its your husband who has nothing but your best interest in mind.
After my wife gave birth to our daughter, I think she got up to like 160 or more pounds. So I put together a spreadsheet to track her exercises and weight loss until she got back down to her "normal" weight. At first she was a bit hesitant to "check in" but once she started doing it, the motivating factor of seeing her progress just snowballed into her wanting to workout more (as in do different types of workouts), eat right and she actually looked forward to her twice weekly weigh ins and exercise updates. She enjoyed it so much, that she now has keeps her own spreadsheet/log to keep track of her weight/exercises/workouts.
EXACTLY what I was just thinking! Who is he? If he is your trainer of course he would want an update lol. Husband, sure, why not? Maybe he wants to support you and that show's he's interested and concerned. Especially if you are at an unhealthy weight....it becomes more than vanity it becomes a health issue and if it is somone who loves you it makes total sense that "he" would be concerned. If it's a co-worker or some random dude then....yea, that would be just weird.
Is "HE" your doctor? Boyfriend? Husband? You didnt make that clear in your post. If "HE" is your boyfriend and this makes you feel uncomfortable you need to tell him. However, if this "HE" is your doctor or husband then I think you should understand that its coming from a different viewpoint and that you should be a bit more open about it. Especially if its your husband who has nothing but your best interest in mind.
After my wife gave birth to our daughter, I think she got up to like 160 or more pounds. So I put together a spreadsheet to track her exercises and weight loss until she got back down to her "normal" weight. At first she was a bit hesitant to "check in" but once she started doing it, the motivating factor of seeing her progress just snowballed into her wanting to workout more (as in do different types of workouts), eat right and she actually looked forward to her twice weekly weigh ins and exercise updates. She enjoyed it so much, that she now has keeps her own spreadsheet/log to keep track of her weight/exercises/workouts.
Personally, it wouldn't matter to me who "he" was, I am the one who controls what I do, how I do it, and when. If I choose to lose weight, then I don't need someone tracking anything for me, I can do it myself thank you. I would politely decline the "help", and do what works for me.
Personally, it wouldn't matter to me who "he" was, I am the one who controls what I do, how I do it, and when. If I choose to lose weight, then I don't need someone tracking anything for me, I can do it myself thank you. I would politely decline the "help", and do what works for me.
That's great and all....whatever works for you but everyone is different. Personally, if somone I loved, whether it be my boyfriend, husband, brother, father, uncle whatever,......if they were unhealthily overweight then OMG of course I would care and of course I would do whatever was in my power to help them. Why would it be such a bad thing if somone wanted to support you?? Would you rather have no one care??? To each his own but that just sounds sad to me.
That's great and all....whatever works for you but everyone is different. Personally, if somone I loved, whether it be my boyfriend, husband, brother, father, uncle whatever,......if they were unhealthily overweight then OMG of course I would care and of course I would do whatever was in my power to help them. Why would it be such a bad thing if somone wanted to support you?? Would you rather have no one care??? To each his own but that just sounds sad to me.
I agree. My wife loved it. A couple of my martial arts students (one male and one female) are doing the same thing right now. They are what you call extremely obese but we are tracking their progress in our weekly private training sessions. What they are doing is posting their weekly weight loss on their Facebook updates and are getting great support and encouragement from all of their Facebook friends.
I would be flattered and just about brought to tears if someone cared enough about me and my health to want to motivate me and keep me on track with my weight loss. But everyone's different.
OP, just try it for a few weeks to see if it motivates you. If it doesnt, then just stop. You have nothing really to lose, and possibly a whole lot to gain (in health and motivation that is).
Personally, it wouldn't matter to me who "he" was, I am the one who controls what I do, how I do it, and when. If I choose to lose weight, then I don't need someone tracking anything for me, I can do it myself thank you. I would politely decline the "help", and do what works for me.
If 'he' is your trainer or doctor, the 'he' is keeping your best interest at heart, holding you accountable. When I had a personal trainer he was great at motivating me, helping me keep on track. It's not unreasonable for a professional to ask. And if you are uncomfortable with this, decline.
If 'he' is your boyfriend, that is an entirely different story. Kick his butt to the curb.
Personally, it wouldn't matter to me who "he" was, I am the one who controls what I do, how I do it, and when. If I choose to lose weight, then I don't need someone tracking anything for me, I can do it myself thank you. I would politely decline the "help", and do what works for me.
Ditto. This does not sound like "support" to me; it sounds like "control."
It's nobody else's business -- except maybe your doctor's, and s/he keeps track of those statistics without a running update from the patient -- unless you're comfortable providing "him" with that information.
And there is no difference between boyfriend and husband where this type of information is concerned. If you don't want to provide it, don't give it out. Your boyfriend or husband must respect that.
Last edited by Ohiogirl81; 06-18-2009 at 10:08 AM..
Reason: ridiculous runon sentence
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