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Old 12-17-2013, 08:48 PM
 
Location: Beautiful Niagara Falls ON.
10,019 posts, read 10,839,570 times
Reputation: 8915

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Quote:
Originally Posted by bluemoonpie View Post
As long as the media pushes images of women who are lightskinned, white or mixed down my throat. I will never ever be happy. I'll always feel unhappy and incomplete. I always dream of a day that I can wake up and see nothing but positive images of women who are darkskinned and fully black like me. Or hear men say they prefer a darkskinned blk woman. I'd be so happy and wouldn't have all this anger inside. But that will never happen
Why do you allow other people to decide who and what you are? I don't believe that what these other people think is the real reason for your misery. You are miserable because you choose to believe and accept what other people think about you, about beauty and about what is really important in this life.

I have a good friend who is a single mom. She came here from Uganda 15 years ago and I don't think it's possible to be blacker than she is. She is the complete opposite of you. She thinks that she is beautiful and in fact she is. She thinks she is worthy, is a good mother and feels very good about herself in all respects. You know, there could be someone here in this city that does not like or accept her or like her because she is black but to her it's like water off a duck's back.

Many people do not like me and reject me because I'm a committed Christian. That does not bother me one single little iota. I have confidence in who I am and what I believe and no amount of persecution could change that fact.

I suggest that you stop whining about the cards you have been dealt and just play the game to the best of your ability. Just remember that true love is BLIND. Have you ever thought that your attitude about yourself makes you fairly unlovable? It's not your colour people reject, it's you and your attitude about yourself.

 
Old 12-17-2013, 08:49 PM
 
Location: Pa
42,717 posts, read 45,443,970 times
Reputation: 25146
I hear Lamar is available.
 
Old 12-17-2013, 08:55 PM
 
706 posts, read 976,119 times
Reputation: 1470
Quote:
Originally Posted by Raena77 View Post
I hear Lamar is available.
 
Old 12-17-2013, 09:01 PM
 
101 posts, read 88,460 times
Reputation: 20
Quote:
Originally Posted by lucknow View Post
Why do you allow other people to decide who and what you are? I don't believe that what these other people think is the real reason for your misery. You are miserable because you choose to believe and accept what other people think about you, about beauty and about what is really important in this life.

I have a good friend who is a single mom. She came here from Uganda 15 years ago and I don't think it's possible to be blacker than she is. She is the complete opposite of you. She thinks that she is beautiful and in fact she is. She thinks she is worthy, is a good mother and feels very good about herself in all respects. You know, there could be someone here in this city that does not like or accept her or like her because she is black but to her it's like water off a duck's back.

Many people do not like me and reject me because I'm a committed Christian. That does not bother me one single little iota. I have confidence in who I am and what I believe and no amount of persecution could change that fact.

I suggest that you stop whining about the cards you have been dealt and just play the game to the best of your ability. Just remember that true love is BLIND. Have you ever thought that your attitude about yourself makes you fairly unlovable? It's not your colour people reject, it's you and your attitude about yourself.
Look at women like Evelyn Lozado, who have nasty disgusting personalities, but can still attract tons of black men based on their lightskin and straight hair. So please don't try to convince me that all I need is a beautiful personality and confidence because its straight bullsh1t. It's how you look that attracts men, and based on how good looking you are, they'll put up with whatever crap you throw at them. If I had biracial features, I'd be able to attract any man I wanted, I wouldn't be so unhappy, and I'd have people affirming my beauty everyday
Quote:
She came here from Uganda 15 years ago and I don't think it's possible to be blacker than she is. She is the complete opposite of you. She thinks that she is beautiful and in fact she is. She thinks she is worthy, is a good mother and feels very good about herself in all respects. You know, there could be someone here in this city that does not like or accept her or like her because she is black but to her it's like water off a duck's back.
See, I don't want to have to tell myself I am beautiful, and a good person. I want men to tell me that. I want to be a bombshell with mixed features, & straight hair; the type of looks that men find universally attractive
 
Old 12-17-2013, 09:02 PM
 
4,725 posts, read 4,587,088 times
Reputation: 9051
When you are so full of self-hatred, there is nothing anyone can say to help you. If I were you, I would find a good therapist and maybe he/she can help you to see yourself as more than just a color. Good luck and goodbye.
 
Old 12-17-2013, 09:08 PM
 
Location: Beautiful Niagara Falls ON.
10,019 posts, read 10,839,570 times
Reputation: 8915
Quote:
Originally Posted by bluemoonpie View Post
Look at women like Evelyn Lozado, who have nasty disgusting personalities, but can still attract tons of black men based on their lightskin and straight hair. So please don't try to convince me that all I need is a beautiful personality and confidence because its straight bullsh1t. It's how you look that attracts men, and based on how good looking you are, they'll put up with whatever crap you throw at them. If I had biracial features, I'd be able to attract any man I wanted, I wouldn't be so unhappy, and I'd have people affirming my beauty everydaySee, I don't want to have to tell myself I am beautiful, and a good person. I want men to tell me that. I want to be a bombshell with mixed features, & straight hair; the type of looks that men find universally attractive
The kind of man you describe is a man not worth having. When a man only sees you as a piece of meat there is always a choicer cut that comes along. My friend does not tell herself she is beautiful SHE KNOWS she is!
 
Old 12-17-2013, 09:10 PM
 
Location: Middle America
37,232 posts, read 43,567,252 times
Reputation: 51960
You know, posting this brand of crazy in fashion & beauty instead of in relationships doesn't make it any less likely to get locked down.
 
Old 12-17-2013, 09:11 PM
 
Location: RI, MA, VT, WI, CA, IN (that one sucked), KY
36,946 posts, read 26,639,646 times
Reputation: 34128
Quote:
Originally Posted by bluemoonpie View Post
I don't want to have to tell myself I am beautiful, and a good person. I want men to tell me that. I want to be a bombshell with mixed features, & straight hair; the type of looks that men find universally attractive

What you want is not reasonable. You want to control others and have them think and feel what you want them to, or to be something you are not. That isn't reasonable or healthy.
 
Old 12-17-2013, 09:16 PM
 
Location: Middle America
37,232 posts, read 43,567,252 times
Reputation: 51960
Quote:
Originally Posted by bluemoonpie View Post
See, I don't want to have to tell myself I am beautiful, and a good person. I want men to tell me that.
Then find better men.

And, for God's sake, adjust your personality so that they won't deem you a miserable, dissatisfied, unhappy, insecure person they want to go nowhere near.
 
Old 12-17-2013, 09:20 PM
 
101 posts, read 88,460 times
Reputation: 20
Quote:
Originally Posted by TabulaRasa View Post
Then find better men.

And, for God's sake, adjust your personality so that they won't deem you a miserable, dissatisfied, unhappy, insecure person they want to go nowhere near.
. Why would I be happy if I look nothing like the standard of beauty? Just what in the heck is there a reason to be happy for when I'm bombarded with images of women who are lighter than I am, and have naturally sstraight hair which I do not possess? I see black men regularly dating women who look nothing like me. Happiness does not exist for me. I don't have any reason to be smile
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