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No, I don't want to age gracefully. I'd prefer not to age at all. I'm not going to read 18 pages, although I'm sure there's some great replies in there. But I'm accepting of my fate.
I gave up dressy clothing, bras, nylons, synthetics, high heels, nail polish, make-up, and live in my black jeans and tee-shirts, and have never been happier. I do nothing to my face but lotion after a shower. I look pretty good!
Whatever about aging gracefully, you can't stop, let alone reverse the aging process with all the magic creams and potions in the world. This is bad news for the cosmetic and supplement industries.
Location: As of 2022….back to SoCal. OC this time!
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Quote:
Originally Posted by The Very Man Himself
Whatever about aging gracefully, you can't stop, let alone reverse the aging process with all the magic creams and potions in the world. This is bad news for the cosmetic and supplement industries.
Ofc there is nothing “magic” about it BUT that doesn’t mean gentle cleansers, toners, moisturizers & sunscreens aren’t helpful AND most of us use different products at different times. Even as teens most of us have used clear complexion masks or acne creams....so it’s the opposite of bad news for the cosmetic industry IMO.
None of it is meant to “stop” or reverse the aging process tho. It’s just to have healthier & smoother skin as you age because many ppl that don’t take care of themselves look older, like ppl who drink a lot of alcohol or smoke AND ppl that spend a lot of time tanning or eat too much of the wrong stuff.
Ageing is a natural process and we should learn to accept and embrace it cheerfully. In-fact there are many people who look more attractive when are middle aged or 45+. The more you worry about your greing hair, the more it is going to come and haunt you. instead, if you focus on looking more graceful as you age, it will be great for your own self.
I am 40+ and I am really enjoying those grey hair that shows how many seasons I have experienced. I truly believe that I look more graceful and mature than I was when I was in my 20's or 30's.
Last edited by wellnesszing; 06-18-2021 at 09:27 AM..
Reason: to correct the typo errors.
Truly, I can only take comments about aging gracefully seriously when they come from someone a good bit older than I am (54) who has the experience of getting into their senior years.
In my 30s and 40s, I sounded a lot like the younger people here. "Oh, embrace aging," "Oh, don't worry about gray hair/bags under your eyes/wrinkles/getting thicker around your waist," "Oh, I would never do surgery or expensive treatments."
My older sisters told me, "You say that now, but you do not know what it is like."
They were right. Until you are going through it, you really do not know what it is like.
The same goes for men commenting on what they think women "should" do about aging. Until silver temples and other signs of aging are as broadly accepted as "distinguished" for women as they are for men, any comments from men about what women "should" do only reveal their male privilege.
I had my first laser treatments this week. My skin already looks better--smoother, softer, fresher, one friend said "porcelain"--and I am not done healing yet. People can make all the comments and judgments they like, but I absolutely consider it money well spent. Again, most would be surprised at how many people they know have had things like laser treatments and "work done." It is just that a lot of people don't talk about it because they are judged and shamed for it by people who think they know best what others "should" do. If no one did it, these treatments would not exist because there would be no demand for them.
The bottom line is that it is your body and your money, and if you like the way cosmetic treatments make you look, go for it. That is the beauty of being free to make our own choices, no pun intended.
I'm an old woman and it was over fifty years ago that I decided to "age gracefully," but my definition is probably not the same as many others.
I am Autistic, but so many years ago, I did not know that. I was just the "weird as hell,crazy, spazzy little retard" who never fit in and was abused by many people in horrific ways. My Grandmother-on my fathers' side- would visit from Illinois once a year. I was never close to her, but I was fascinated by her stories. One of my favorites was how she always managed to take a bus round-trip from Peoia Illinois to Denver Colorado for less than $4. She said that she would purchase a ticket to the nearest destination. She would hang onto her ticket when the bus driver went through the aisle picking up tickets. He could see part of her ticket but she would hold it between her fingers pretending to be asleep. She told us that she would always "snore" loudly so that the bus driver would know that she was alright. She said they would always give up and leave her with the ticket. She would transfer several times on her way to Denver [and back again] and use the same ticket with the same trick wherever she went. She said that people did not want to upset a weird, crazy old woman and that it worked to her advantage. I remember thinking, maybe it would be awesome to be old and have weirdness be normal.
A number of years later, I was doing volunteer work as a "candy striper" at a local nursing home. It was depressing. Most of the people were in wheel chairs, slurring words [if they spoke at all] and obviously drugged.[I would supply the assortment of juices as the residents took their meds. My mother was in the medical profession and when I described some of the pills to her she explained that the residents were srongly sedated]
On my first day,while passing out fruit juices I was warned of one particularly difficult patient who had only recently agreed to take her meds. If she had continued to refuse, I was told, she would be "put somewhere", where I had no idea.
As we neared her door, she, I can't say walked, so much as glided from her room and approached us. She was wearing a bright kimono and black silky pants. On her feet she was wearing black shoes that I thought looked like ballet slippers, which I later discovered were. Her head was held high, and her posture was perfect. She was small and thin, yet she looked strong. When I looked at her wrinkled face I remember thinking "so, That's what a Mona Lisa smile is."
I was impressed when she chose cranberry juice to take with her meds, which, for some reason I considered a very sophisticated choice [I would have been dissapointed had she chosen the prune, orange, grape or apple juice] she took her meds, swallowed,narrowed her lids, jutted out her chin, and with a sigh opened her mouth and stuck out her tongue for all to see that she had actually taken her pills.
I was fascinated by this woman. Since it was the end of my shift and I had awhile to wait for my mother to pick me up, I made some excuse to go right back into the womans' room. I caught her spitting the meds, which she had obviously NOT swallowed, into a napkin.
"Don't tell anyone" she said in a quiet yet commanding voice. "I won't," I promised. I remember thinking that she was was one of the most beautiful women I had ever seen.
I started visiting her at the end of every shift. I found out that she had been a professional ballerina for years, dancing throughout the world, later marrying, having children and eventually purchasing her own studio and teaching ballet to others.
As she got older, her family decided that there was something wrong with her, as she wouldn't act her age but continued teaching and practicing her routines. She also refused to wear the super short, pinned, and shellacked with Aqua Net hairdos, but kept it pinned back as she had while dancing.
There was a problem with the way she dressed as well. Most of you are too young to remember this, but this was back in the day when most women over the age of sixty [or younger] ussually, other than to church, wore hideous, shapeless Housedresses and huge ugly shoes. That was what was expected, and one of the reasons that women looked old at such a young age back then.
Her family, in "her best interests" and against her will, brought her to the nursing home. It wasn't long before the family stopped visiting.
She knew she was a prima ballerina and refused to behave as anyone other than herself. She was also the first person, other than a seldom seen grandfather, who treated me as a respected and equal human.
Soon after that is when I heard the term "aging gracefully." I decided that was what I felt this woman [not sure if I ever knew her name, which is alright, because she called me Julie, which is not my name] was doing, and to a lesser extent, my grandmother.
So, life has actually become better the older I have gotten. We go on a cruise at least once every other year. Almost every time I have been approached by one of the dancers from entertainment knowingly tell me that they can tell I was a dancer when I was young because of the way I move and because of the shape of my legs[ that part came from my nearly constant walking on my toes, as is very common in Autistics] They get a confused look when I tell them that I have never been a professional dancer but I was definitely touched by one.
I feel I am aging gracefully. I am treated so much better than I did when I was younger, and they don't know that my weirdness is not part of being old, that I've always been this way. I have no botox, no fillers, and I believe I am aging gracefully and beautifully.
Thank you for sharing this. I can picture the prima ballerina perfectly by your description. I'm sure you brought a lot of joy into her life by being her friend and really listening to her. You were indeed touch by a ballerina. Lovely
My grandmother had beautiful smooth skin even as she aged.
She was an avid gardner but always wore large hats, scarves, gloves when in the garden. She didn't have a freckle on her face.
I on the other hand grew up in the age of dark tans. I was always trying to get a tan and rarely succeeded in getting more than a limp beige. Many burns in trying.
As a consequence I have skin cancer (not melanoma). Have had many pre-emergent treatments over the years.
Just finished two treatments of topical chemotherapy on my face and neck. It only reacts to cancer cells in the skin, healthy skin isn't affected.
I was amazed at how much cancer was in my face, especially under eyes, across the bridge of my nose and above my lips, even my lips reacted but not as much as I always wore lip balm with sunscreen.
It was intense, the dermatologist who prescribed the treatment said it's like a chemical peel but only on cancerous skin.
The results after treatment have been encouraging, my skin, while still a little red and peeling in spots, is much smoother.
"Sunspots" and "freckles" which were actually cancer have gone thankfully. Even so, the doctor wants me to do another treatment in the fall.
A friend of mine said I "look 25" I don't, she was being nice but my skin does look better. Especially the dark circles under the eyes that reacted strongly to the chemicals.
Sun was a contributor but there is also a genetic component.
F - 72
Last edited by RubyandPearl; 06-20-2021 at 09:56 AM..
And worse yet is when they also let their thin, wiry, bald-on-top scraggly gray hair grow past their shoulders.
And THEN put it in a ponytail.
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Ofc there is nothing “magic” about it BUT that doesn’t mean gentle cleansers, toners, moisturizers & sunscreens aren’t helpful AND most of us use different products at different times. Even as teens most of us have used clear complexion masks or acne creams....so it’s the opposite of bad news for the cosmetic industry IMO. 
