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I suggest you just make your changes, don't think about other people. If someone comments, just say thanks, I love these sandals, glad I bought them, and move on.
This. After all OP you aren't talking about very significant changes to your "dress code" are you? Nothing outside a rather ordinary range of options. Dithering over short sleeves vs tank, sandals vs sneakers, one color palate over another, cargos vs jeans just isn't going to trigger much notice by most people. Now if you decide to sport profanity-splattered Ts, kimono robes, Canada Goose parkas in July, or flamingo print swim trunks in January that understandably might raise a few eyebrows. You're wasting a lot of mental energy over trivia and IMHO that's due to emotional baggage you keep carrying around. That is fixable. There are many aspects of day to day living worth a bit of worry. This isn't one of them.
Last edited by Parnassia; 05-30-2023 at 12:31 PM..
Of all people to be concerned about. What about other people in your life? Are you also concerned about what your boss and coworkers and friends think of your clothing and shoe choices? Getting teased at school is one thing. We're adults now.
I suggest you just make your changes, don't think about other people. If someone comments, just say thanks, I love these sandals, glad I bought them, and move on.
Yeah, I think what I went through as a child really psychologically affected me till this day and it sucks. But this is one thing where I just need to get over my fear and just do it. It's funny because I know that most people probably don't care and you guys gave me that extra assurance that they really don't care, but I can't help but still feel a little self conscious sporting a new look for the first time. Even simply changing hairstyles when I was in school used to worry me. Like, what will my classmates think? And till this day, I managed to take that baggage with me.
Yeah, I think what I went through as a child really psychologically affected me till this day and it sucks. But this is one thing where I just need to get over my fear and just do it. It's funny because I know that most people probably don't care and you guys gave me that extra assurance that they really don't care, but I can't help but still feel a little self conscious sporting a new look for the first time. Even simply changing hairstyles when I was in school used to worry me. Like, what will my classmates think? And till this day, I managed to take that baggage with me.
I can relate a little bit, I think.
My hair is long. I didn't always have long hair, but now it is, and there's lots of ways I COULD wear it, and I play around in front of a mirror, trying this and that...but almost always come back to wearing it the same as always.
There's a little, niggling voice in my head that says "I'll look funny if I wear my hair up, or wear it in a braid, or a bun, etc. So, except to curl it from time to time, I don't rock that boat.
But I don't have any qualms about wearing new clothes. I like wearing new clothes, and like any positive attention that comes with it. But I think I can see that if you spent school years trying to blend into the background (and I understand that) that might stay with you.
Start small with the sandals. When you get comfortable wearing sandals around then you can try donning a sleeveless top.
I really don't see too many 50+ guys walking around their regular neighborhoods with sleeveless tops on. At a beach resort, maybe. I guess it depends on where you live.
I am assuming, of course, that you're in the 50+ age range. But that might be a false assumption on my part.
Start small with the sandals. When you get comfortable wearing sandals around then you can try donning a sleeveless top.
I really don't see too many 50+ guys walking around their regular neighborhoods with sleeveless tops on. At a beach resort, maybe. I guess it depends on where you live.
I am assuming, of course, that you're in the 50+ age range. But that might be a false assumption on my part.
I'm 37. Not fit, but slim. But just prefer to wear a sleeveless top or tank top because it's darn hot and muggy over the summer. And also, with short sleeves, it causes uneven tan where the top half of my upper arm is pale as a ghost and the rest of my arm is tan. Looks goofy.
I'm 37. Not fit, but slim. But just prefer to wear a sleeveless top or tank top because it's darn hot and muggy over the summer. And also, with short sleeves, it causes uneven tan where the top half of my upper arm is pale as a ghost and the rest of my arm is tan. Looks goofy.
Yeah, I'm not saying that there is anything wrong with guys wearing those tanks, I just don't see too many 55+ men wearing them outside of beach/resort areas or mowing the lawn. It just dawned on me that if the Op is in the 55+ age range, he might have observed that, too.
Yeah, I'm not saying that there is anything wrong with guys wearing those tanks, I just don't see too many 55+ men wearing them outside of beach/resort areas or mowing the lawn. It just dawned on me that if the Op is in the 55+ age range, he might have observed that, too.
I am the OP and I am 37. I haven't observed that, but just observed that it's mostly women that prevalently wear sleeveless or tank tops. Most guys that do either have muscles or tattoos to show off. Gaining a lot of muscle mass might be too difficult and time consuming for me, so maybe I'll get a tattoo so I have a reason to wear sleeveless!
All kidding aside, the fact that it's not all too common with men to wear makes it even harder for me to wear them. I feel like it would call too much attention.
I am the OP and I am 37. I haven't observed that, but just observed that it's mostly women that prevalently wear sleeveless or tank tops. Most guys that do either have muscles or tattoos to show off. Gaining a lot of muscle mass might be too difficult and time consuming for me, so maybe I'll get a tattoo so I have a reason to wear sleeveless!
All kidding aside, the fact that it's not all too common with men to wear makes it even harder for me to wear them. I feel like it would call too much attention.
Wear what feels comfortable to you, don't overthink it. My husband will be 60 soon and he would look good in a sleeveless tank. He usually wears tee shirts or collared polos though. But that was true when he was 30 or 40, too.
Wear what feels comfortable to you, don't overthink it. My husband will be 60 soon and he would look good in a sleeveless tank. He usually wears tee shirts or collared polos though. But that was true when he was 30 or 40, too.
Thanks, yeah I really should start wearing them before I turn 50 and can’t wear them anymore.
I don’t know if it’s just you… But in this case it’s you.
My goodness, the number of people who care about what other people think of them and what they wear, and what they drive, it’s crazy.
Sometimes I really do think it’s a self-esteem issue. Unless you sign my paycheck, or can put me out in the street and make me homeless… I don’t give two hoots about what somebody thinks about what I wear or what I drive.
If a person has a little bit of angst about picking out the right outfit for a wedding, or meeting in-laws for the first time, or the first day on the job, or a job interview, that’s understandable… and even then people can over stress out about it.
But most times other people don’t care. And so what if we talk about you. Ever heard the phrase what people think of me is not of my business?
I just read the OP… You care with the doorman of your apartment building things about your sandals? I’m done, I am out. SMH
Last edited by selhars; 05-31-2023 at 07:35 AM..
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