[jacsmora]

HELP! I am 30yrs old and a mother of 3. My husband has his own business and we don't make much money. I'm trying to get a college degree. We moved to NY from Miami, Florida 3 years ago and live in Queens. Unfortunately, it hasn't been very easy for us here. We live paycheck to paycheck and can hardly afford the rent. My kids are just not happy. They miss their family. The problem is, I hate Florida. We struggled just as much in Florida and personally, I'd rather be here. I feel there are better schools, more parks, more opportunities for my kids but they don't see it that way. In addition, over here there's change of scenery, seasons, etc. Florida is just hot all the time. I'm just tired of struggling to pay my bills and seeing my kids so unhappy. I don't know what to do. I know that if I move back to Miami, I will struggle just as much as I struggle here. The only positive thing about Florida is that I'll be close to my sister. HELP!

[SunnyDog]

Uh, are you asking for personal preference? Personally I'd take Miami over Queens anyday as I don't do jackets and snow shoveling. But that's just me. This is something you would be best served deciding for yourself--what's most important to you?

[bale002]

It certainly sounds like a choice between the lesser of two evils, or a dilemma, as you put it.

I assume your husband's business generates more or less the same income whether in Queens or Miami.

Overall, taxes and rent have to be less in Miami than in Queens as well as the general cost of living, even though Miami is certainly no longer a low-cost area.

It seems that you value the northeast climate over the southern Florida climate, which is fair enough.

Assuming income remains equal, the only objective advantage of Queens over Miami, in my view at least, is public transportation.
What other objective advantages does Queens have over Miami (again, assuming income remains equal)?

In my experience, the quality of the student matters more than the quality of the school (I have attended universities in four states in the US and in five different countries in four different languages).

There is no lack of job opportunities in Miami, but one does need to have skills and contacts in the right sector, but this is the case in any big population center throughout the world.

There are plenty of parks in certain areas of Miami, like Kendall, I believe.

Family is important, especially if one actually enjoys being in the company of one's family members.

You seem to imply that your children were at least less unhappy in Miami.

Life is a struggle no matter what one's station.

Add up the pluses and minuses, it appears Miami has the edge over Queens in this case.

Unless there is some other factor missing from this equation: perhaps you simply don't enjoy being with your family?

[RedWingsFan]

You prefer NY over Florida? Not me, give me Florida anyday. NY is way too crowded, too expensive and too over-rated.

Why not move somewhere in Florida that isn't Miami? That way it's cheaper and you still love closer to family. Or, and I don't mean to be mean, but if your husband isn't not making much money with his business then maybe he needs to go to work for someone else so that he can provide a better quality of life for his family.

[lisanyfl12]

Depending on where you live in Queens you should stay in NY. I know the city schools are mixed some good some bad but as far as I can tell they are in NY so they gotta be better than here. Overall NY is rated a lot better in education than florida. As for the weather it is sooooo much nicer to have the 4 seasons instead of just one "summer". I'm so depressed not to see leaves change color and fall for the first time in my life. As for things to do both areas have a lot going on. I would stay in Ny I wish I did and I plan to go back next year.

[watsont3]

Do your husband and kids hate Florida as you do? The other question is- Is living from paycheck to paycheck any better in New York than in Miami?
Sounds like a serious family discussion of the alternatives and desires is warranted. I think that the suggestion about another are of Florida may have merit.
Whatever the decision, good luck.

[firemed]

Originally Posted by lisanyfl12

Depending on where you live in Queens you should stay in NY. I know the city schools are mixed some good some bad but as far as I can tell they are in NY so they gotta be better than here. Overall NY is rated a lot better in education than florida. As for the weather it is sooooo much nicer to have the 4 seasons instead of just one "summer". I'm so depressed not to see leaves change color and fall for the first time in my life. As for things to do both areas have a lot going on. I would stay in Ny I wish I did and I plan to go back next year.

The south has other states Ga, Sc, Nc, you could be a halfback. you wont get snow but you will have 4 seasons. and it cost less for a home and the cost of living.

[jacsmora]

Originally Posted by watsont3

Do your husband and kids hate Florida as you do?

I'd like to thank all of you for your responses. My kids really want to go back. They hate NY. My husband doesn't hate NY but he likes Florida better.

It looks like my choice has been made for me. I have to be where my family is happy. Even if that means I have to miss out on the snow and the seasons and all the beautiful weather. They want to be their cousins and aunts and uncles and grandma and grandpa. I'm being selfish by staying in NY and I have to make my family happy.

Who knows, maybe when my kids get older, I can retire up here or just a little more North like some of you said. Who says you have to retire in Florida, anyway?

Living in the South is just not an option right now because the whole point is for my kids to be with their family and they don't want to be anywhere else. They'll be just as miserable as they are here.

And yes, the schools are a lot better in NY. But, you take the good with the bad.

Thanks for your help everybody. I'm sad about it but I know I'm making the right choice.

[bale002]

Originally Posted by jacsmora

And yes, the schools are a lot better in NY. But, you take the good with the bad.

An old saying: dispense with the schools, have good masters at home instead, spare no expense for this purpose.

Originally Posted by jacsmora

Thanks for your help everybody. I'm sad about it but I know I'm making the right choice.

You're welcome and God bless you and your family.