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It honestly wasn't a man vs woman thing for me. I have no idea where that even came from.
It may not have been intentional - and it often isn't. You only mentioned your sisters-in-law as being poor cooks, and even joked that perhaps they were purposefully performing badly in order to "get out of" the work of cooking. Where are your brothers? Can they make deviled eggs? Why are they not having to come up with a reason to get out of cooking obligations at family events? You also mentioned that it "would be nice" if you husband would learn to cook. Why? To give you a break or so that he could eat if you were unavailable. Not because it's something he simply should be able to do as a self sufficient adult. A bonus.
It honestly wasn't a man vs woman thing for me. I have no idea where that even came from.
Read your own posts and quite a few others....you give a pass to the men in your family while casting aspersions on the charecters of the women who can't or don't want to cook.
It may not have been intentional - and it often isn't. You only mentioned your sisters-in-law as being poor cooks, and even joked that perhaps they were purposefully performing badly in order to "get out of" the work of cooking. Where are your brothers? Can they make deviled eggs? Why are they not having to come up with a reason to get out of cooking obligations at family events? You also mentioned that it "would be nice" if you husband would learn to cook. Why? To give you a break or so that he could eat if you were unavailable. Not because it's something he simply should be able to do as a self sufficient adult. A bonus.
Quote:
Originally Posted by ScarletG
Read your own posts and quite a few others....you give a pass to the men in your family while casting aspersions on the charecters of the women who can't or don't want to cook.
Actually, I just didn't mention the guys at all. My father-in-law and one of my brothers-in-law do the bulk of the cooking. My MIL has really bad arthritis, so the rest of us just bring the side dishes. I didn't mean to start a gender war or perpetuate any stereotypes. My side of the family, all the women know how to cook; that's what I grew up with but I didn't realize I was coming across as stereotyping.
My husband's family is different. I've learned we're all different, no big deal. I know there are men who love to cook and are really good at it. The BIL that I mentioned makes homemade cream and stuffs them into strawberries as an appetizer, even cuts the strawberries into these little designs; I would never take the time to do that.
Hah, my house is the degree of messy it is because my husband is a slob. I do what I can to get things to my preferred level of neat, and pick up after myself, but I WILL NOT baby a grown man and follow him around picking up after him constantly. He lived here ten years before I did, and everyone who sets foot in our house knows that it's ten million times tidier now than when he lived here alone. I guarantee I am NOT getting the brunt of any criticism, if anybody's engaging in any. They're probably amazed I've rehabbed things to the extend that I have.
I didn't mean to start a gender war or perpetuate any stereotypes.
Not a gender war - actually I think it's one of those things women judge other women about more than men judge women about. Even though women have been in the workforce for generations now, often times it is still expected that we maintain the same level of homemaking skills that previous generations of women were expected to have (even if they didn't).
Today the majority of the women hold full time jobs. They come home tired, just like the man does. The idea of taking hours to prepare a meal, is not something they have time or inclination for.
They have alternatives the women did not have back in the 30s and 40s when I grew up and everything was made from scratch.
Today, they have Take Out to feed a family when they don't have time and energy to cook.
They have frozen dinners, for when they don't have time and energy to cook.
They have foods that are easy to prepare. Canned foods, frozen foods, etc., etc. They have microwave ovens to prepare food quickly.
When a woman or man gets home from work at 5:30 or 6 pm, they don't have time to do their cooking from scratch that so many on this thread are calling cooking. They can't wait till 8:30 or 9pm to give their children dinner.
Today the young families have had to adjust with the times, and find ways to feed a family in an hour or less, as they don't have the time to do scratch cooking.
We don't take the horse and wagon to town to shop any more, as we now use automobiles. The same for cooking, people have had to find ways to feed a family in a much shorter time as they don't have time to scratch cook. They can use a cake mix to make a cake, and use canned frosting to frost it, but simply do not have time to do it any other way, as they have worked all day, and need to feed a family quickly.
Don't blame the young women for not being good cooks doing everything from scratch. They have too many other things to do that take priority.
We had 4 sons, and 2 of them are 5 star high end chefs for years. Today one of those 2 owns a fine art gallery, a bronze casting studio, and has done more commissions for public art in life size bronze castings than anyone else in his part of the country. The other has retired. I am a good cook myself, but still look for a way to get my food on the table in a reasonable time. My wife and I am on two different diets, so we prepare our own food.
Anyone that looks down on the young housewives of today that don't cook the old fashioned way from scratch, should be ashamed of themselves. You may have the time to cook that way, but those young working housewives and single women don't have the luxury you do. There are not that many hours in the day for them.
Today the majority of the women hold full time jobs. They come home tired, just like the man does. The idea of taking hours to prepare a meal, is not something they have time or inclination for.
They have alternatives the women did not have back in the 30s and 40s when I grew up and everything was made from scratch.
Today, they have Take Out to feed a family when they don't have time and energy to cook.
They have frozen dinners, for when they don't have time and energy to cook.
They have foods that are easy to prepare. Canned foods, frozen foods, etc., etc. They have microwave ovens to prepare food quickly.
When a woman or man gets home from work at 5:30 or 6 pm, they don't have time to do their cooking from scratch that so many on this thread are calling cooking. They can't wait till 8:30 or 9pm to give their children dinner.
Today the young families have had to adjust with the times, and find ways to feed a family in an hour or less, as they don't have the time to do scratch cooking.
We don't take the horse and wagon to town to shop any more, as we now use automobiles. The same for cooking, people have had to find ways to feed a family in a much shorter time as they don't have time to scratch cook. They can use a cake mix to make a cake, and use canned frosting to frost it, but simply do not have time to do it any other way, as they have worked all day, and need to feed a family quickly.
Don't blame the young women for not being good cooks doing everything from scratch. They have too many other things to do that take priority.
We had 4 sons, and 2 of them are 5 star high end chefs for years. Today one of those 2 owns a fine art gallery, a bronze casting studio, and has done more commissions for public art in life size bronze castings than anyone else in his part of the country. The other has retired. I am a good cook myself, but still look for a way to get my food on the table in a reasonable time. My wife and I am on two different diets, so we prepare our own food.
Anyone that looks down on the young housewives of today that don't cook the old fashioned way from scratch, should be ashamed of themselves. You may have the time to cook that way, but those young working housewives and single women don't have the luxury you do. There are not that many hours in the day for them.
Naw.
People who make excuses and don't prioritize their health should be ashamed.
Sorry, I know way too many people who work really hard and still prepare healthy meals from scratch for their families.
Please. Plenty of from scratch foods are orgies of sugar and saturated fat, and plenty of commercial foods are healthy. An apple, no cooking required, is a whole lot better for me than home-made chocolate cake. This is not about health. It's about women shaming other women for not living up to standards that no longer work for many modern families.
Last edited by randomparent; 02-14-2015 at 07:13 PM..
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