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Old 02-22-2012, 11:52 AM
 
4,338 posts, read 7,506,675 times
Reputation: 1656

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Quote:
Originally Posted by stahltkd View Post
Do you realize that you're going to end up paying 21,600 for a 12k car?
Lol. Total cost of ownership. She should call Dave Ramsey and see what he says haha

 
Old 02-22-2012, 02:01 PM
 
Location: SW Kansas
1,787 posts, read 3,849,553 times
Reputation: 1433
I think you need to get rid of the car. You are homebound, so seems to me the car is a needless expense.
Stay in the home you're in, sounds like it is in a safe neighborhood.
I don't know much about the area you live in. There are a lot of charities that help people with job training, paying utilities, even food. I know of ome program here in Kansas that has food for nearly free in exchange for volunteer work. You could volunteer for a woman's help line, or possibly other things that you can do from home. You can earn up to $800(ish) per month while on SSDI. Maybe you can be trained to do work from your home? Sounds like you've done a great job with your kids - maybe you could babysit? Supervise kids after school to be sure they do their homework? There's bound to be something! You've got computer skills, maybe build on that?
Best of luck to you!
 
Old 02-22-2012, 02:25 PM
 
4,135 posts, read 10,813,590 times
Reputation: 2698
Basically, YOU earn 1200 SSDI and you have lived off what the kids got based on your disability . Did you use all theirs for college and clothing (etc) as you should have ? If you did, you wouldn't have lived off that money... which it appears you have since you count the loss of a child's $1,000/mo as loss of your income. It isn't. That money is for the CHILD. ( My sister got SS for her children as a widow and accounted for every penny and never used a cent for herself. That is how it is intended: you use yours and use your children's solely for them). I kind of have a feeling you used theirs to benefit yourself .

So, now the kids are aging off (over 18) and you are short on money . You should have lived on the $1200 /mo you got all along.

So, to get frugal: What's Mom's job? Does it need to be where you are? If not, move. Get yourself an in-home job like typing or doing surveys or sewing.... all of which can be legally done on SSDI up to about $1,000/mo (look on the website). That makes up for your money lost by a kid turning 18. You don't go out a lot?? Dump the car w/payments and use the money you get to get a used car, no added cost... you will go down on insurance and save payments. It'll get you where you need to go ( when you go ). Find a cheaper apt. Or one that has heat and utilities paid. Cut some more costs. Go to the cheapest landline and make the kids get jobs and pay their own school and cell phones.

If you want none of that? You need to call something like Catholic Charities or any other organization and ask them to help you figure out how to do it. They do this all the time.

SSDI is not something to be ashamed of, nor was my sister's getting SS for her kids off their deceased father. Using it for yourself is.

Last edited by BuffaloTransplant; 02-22-2012 at 02:43 PM..
 
Old 02-22-2012, 06:48 PM
 
Location: Southern Maine, Greater Portland
513 posts, read 896,856 times
Reputation: 528
I just have to get this out.... people say the meanest things and blame the original poster for not giving all the details. How about, not jumping to conclusions and just having compassion for someone who is going through some tough times and asking for sound advice. Why must people think the worst??? We all meet challenges in our lives, we need someone to guide us not minimize our self worth. Okay moving on now, there are many ways to cut costs: For television, there is free over air television, land line phones are much less than cell phones. Get creative with homemade food items and buying in bulk. Everyone in the household can step up and do their part to contribute, that is the fair solution. No "one" person should be expected to shoulder all the life burdens. If everyone in the household uses the vehicle, they can all chip in for the expense etc. All the Best to you
 
Old 02-23-2012, 07:04 PM
 
4,338 posts, read 7,506,675 times
Reputation: 1656
So what has the OP done so far?
 
Old 02-23-2012, 07:22 PM
 
Location: Jersey
869 posts, read 1,494,173 times
Reputation: 880
Quote:
Originally Posted by BuffaloTransplant View Post
Basically, YOU earn 1200 SSDI and you have lived off what the kids got based on your disability . Did you use all theirs for college and clothing (etc) as you should have ? If you did, you wouldn't have lived off that money... which it appears you have since you count the loss of a child's $1,000/mo as loss of your income. It isn't. That money is for the CHILD. ( My sister got SS for her children as a widow and accounted for every penny and never used a cent for herself. That is how it is intended: you use yours and use your children's solely for them). I kind of have a feeling you used theirs to benefit yourself .

So, now the kids are aging off (over 18) and you are short on money . You should have lived on the $1200 /mo you got all along.

So, to get frugal: What's Mom's job? Does it need to be where you are? If not, move. Get yourself an in-home job like typing or doing surveys or sewing.... all of which can be legally done on SSDI up to about $1,000/mo (look on the website). That makes up for your money lost by a kid turning 18. You don't go out a lot?? Dump the car w/payments and use the money you get to get a used car, no added cost... you will go down on insurance and save payments. It'll get you where you need to go ( when you go ). Find a cheaper apt. Or one that has heat and utilities paid. Cut some more costs. Go to the cheapest landline and make the kids get jobs and pay their own school and cell phones.

If you want none of that? You need to call something like Catholic Charities or any other organization and ask them to help you figure out how to do it. They do this all the time.

SSDI is not something to be ashamed of, nor was my sister's getting SS for her kids off their deceased father. Using it for yourself is.
She said the loss of income will be child support. And I dont know if you know this or maybe you dont care but child support is used for the child which INCLUDES household expenses like the house the child lives in, the food the child eats, the electric the child uses. Its not like she was at the club
 
Old 02-23-2012, 07:26 PM
 
Location: Jersey
869 posts, read 1,494,173 times
Reputation: 880
My husband got laid off last year which cut our income by 42%. We went from 3,000 a month to 1800. We downsized our apartment, got rid of our car which had a car payment of 356 a month, we went without a car for 6 months then bought one when we had to have it. I started babysitting local kids for an additional income of 100-150 a week. We downgraded our cable and internet from 150 a month to 90. We bought window fans so we didnt use our air as much. Just little things that made it possible for us to live on a greatly reduced income. You should really sit down and look at the out going expenses and seriously think about where you are needlessly spending money.
 
Old 02-23-2012, 08:02 PM
 
Location: Connecticut
2,727 posts, read 6,152,771 times
Reputation: 2004
Whew! Finally got through thread. Wow.

I see both sides - people who really need SSDI and people who abuse it (I see that from a family friend), so I do my best not to judge when given such little info.

First off OP, you *can* work while getting SSDI. My mother's friend's son gets it, but also works a few hours a week.

Second, I highly recommend moving to a low cost area. If your mom doesn't want too, too bad. Then tell her to help you out more, and if she doesn't then just move. Sorry if that sounds harsh, but you need to find what works for YOU. I deal with a mother who complains about where she lives, yet refuses to move. You either help yourself, or you don't and just deal with it.
 
Old 02-23-2012, 08:04 PM
 
Location: Connecticut
2,727 posts, read 6,152,771 times
Reputation: 2004
Quote:
Originally Posted by jasper12 View Post
The problem is that you want to live "frugal", but you are unwilling to make those changes. I have a friend who has lived for two years, with a dorm fridge. Her fridge broke, she could not afford a new one, and decided the old one used too much electric. She has not bought food or water out for years. She does not have a car, she takes the bus. She goes to bed at dark, to save on electric. That is her lifestyle. She has no cable, no health insurance, no phone, no internet, she cuts her own hair, and has no pets, she can't afford them. She takes cold showers, to save money. Uses bar soap on her hair. She buys things only at the Dollar store. And even does dumpster diving at the college when the semester is over, kids throw away tons of stuff, which she uses or sells. That is a frugal life style. Start with those changes.

Wow! Inspiring!

And your friend sounds like another of my mom's friends.
 
Old 02-23-2012, 09:31 PM
 
4,338 posts, read 7,506,675 times
Reputation: 1656
Quote:
Originally Posted by Dave5150 View Post
My husband got laid off last year which cut our income by 42%. We went from 3,000 a month to 1800. We downsized our apartment, got rid of our car which had a car payment of 356 a month, we went without a car for 6 months then bought one when we had to have it. I started babysitting local kids for an additional income of 100-150 a week. We downgraded our cable and internet from 150 a month to 90. We bought window fans so we didnt use our air as much. Just little things that made it possible for us to live on a greatly reduced income. You should really sit down and look at the out going expenses and seriously think about where you are needlessly spending money.
Why not live below you means to begin with so you won't have the financial problems when one loses their job? How were you getting around without the car? Bus?
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