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I've found it VERY hard to try clothing on with my baby. The stroller doesn't fit in the changing room and I hate to keep laying her on the ground. It's difficult to have my husband watch her so I can sneak out as he gets irritated that I want to "stick him" with the baby. I think he sees it as me trying to go out and have some sort of rip roaring good time while gets stuck at home? When I mention wanting to pick up a few items for work he asks if I really "NEEEEEEEED" them. So I try to convince myself I don't need new stuff...
Never having been married, and at 52, with no prospects on the horizon I really don't want to comment on your marriage...but.....I will say YOU are the mama bear of your family. if YOU don't take care of you, you're in no shape to take care of anyone else.
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...When I mention wanting to pick up a few items for work he asks if I really "NEEEEEEEED" them. So I try to convince myself I don't need new stuff, though it can get hard at work as I feel like I stick out like a frumpy soar thumb. I've got the misfitting, pilling outfit, the puffy unstyled hair, the old pair of shoes I wear day after day. Maybe it's just me but I feel like it could impact my work relations if I don't spiff it up a bit.
Set a budget.....a realistic budget...and buy your clothes. Again how many pieces to you want? How much do you want to spend? One month's IRA payment to get you new clothes that can help your career is not make or break. Get your clothes.
If your husband won't watch the baby or gives you too much grieve about it, do you have any grandparents/g-d parents who love to have the baby for a half day? Again without commenting too much on him.....I personally would put my foot down and go buy my new clothes.
OK I lied....-- and NOT to derail the thread -- but your husband can't watch his own child for a half a day!? We'd have to have a talk. Would he rather go OUT with you shopping and play with the baby somewhere in the mall while you shop. He wouldn't be 'stuck at home' and you'd still be free to shop. But something tells me the entire time you're shopping you'd be stressed about 'how much time you're taking." So on top of the feeling you have about buying the sizes you might need -- you'd ALSO be stressed about how long it's taking. That doesn't make for a relaxing shopping experience. Most men wouldn't do that -- just wait in a mall while you shop. I'd THINK he'd rather watch the baby at home...or take the baby and spend the afternoon at someone's house. Either way I would go buy my clothes.
As for where to buy....everyone's suggestions have been excellent.
Buy the best quality you can afford. Only you know whether shopping smart at Walmart or a decent consignment shop, Target/ Gap/Old Navy would work for your work place ... or whether you need to go to TMaxx/Ross/Marshall's. JC Penney or Macy's. Even Sears still has clothes. (which aren't that bad. Sears just has a reputation image problem.)
And of course all shoe stores have sales...I'm an Easy Spirit/Aerolsoles fan and they have shoe sales for leather -- as low as 39.99. So I'd say for shoes you could easily stay under 50.00. Would you rather have two pair from Walmart or Payless/or the regional show chain(here in MD that's Rack Room/ DSW/Parade Shows)...or one pair from Nine West, ES, Clarks? You know what will work best for you right now.
You can always add to your wardrobe over the course of the coming year. Many people DO buy clothes a couple of times a year. So that IS perfectly fine to do.
Whatever you wear at work, it should not be so bad OR extravagant that it distracts from the quality of your work. In other words, you should overall blend in. If everyone is wearing decent clothing, it's better if you don't show up in frayed clothing everyday. I agree with the others on buying basics at regular stores. I am really against Walmart clothing--I feel like their stuff looks bad the first time you wash it. I prefer Ross, Target, TJ Max, JC Penney, etc. Since you're on a budget, I would pick a few basic bottoms without any patterns or really identifying features or unique cuts (ie 2 pairs of black pants, a brown and a khaki maybe) and a few basic tops (maybe a few button downs and a few other simple tops). I would stay away from anything trendy since you want to be able to wear it for a long time--think "classic" cuts instead. Shoes are probably lower on the priority--as long as yours aren't bad, they would be less noticeable than a top when you're sitting at a meeting. You might consider a pair of leather shoes (that you can polish when they look more tired looking) if you decide to buy. So...like 4 pairs of pants and maybe 5-7 tops. That's a minimum. Maybe you can space it out over 4-5 m months since you're on a budget. It doesn't have to be expensive...sometimes you will find stuff on sale for like 15-20 bucks.
What I do when I need a work wardrobe (don't now, because I work from home), is what I have done since high school. I get ten bottoms - pants, skirts, a mix, whatever looks good on you - in neutral colors. For me, I don't care too much for browns, so I go with black, navy, and gray. Then, ten tops that will go with more than one of the bottoms. With neutral bottoms, this is easy, and you can still have some color. You can add accent pieces, like scarves and jewelry as you like. You should have two pairs of good shoes, minimum. Shoes need a day off in between wearings, both to air out, and to reshape. This will give you a good variety of clothes to wear, much more than the two weeks' worth the ten tops/ten bottoms suggests.
Since you know your sizes, and if you know what shapes look good on you, you should be able to order online. Some online shops also pay return shipping, which is really nice. But, if you are like me, you really have to push yourself to actually RETURN the items that don't work! LOL
Oh, and don't forget to get fitted for a good bra, and buy at least two to start. Like shoes, bras need a rest between wearings. I wash mine in mesh bag in the washer (hooked), and hang to dry.
As to your husband, well, pardon me for being blunt, but watching your own child is called "parenting", and he is a parent, yes? So he should pull up his big girl panties and give you some time to take care of yourself.
A middle ground between thrift store shopping and full price retail might be ebay.
I am an ebay seller and I deal mostly in clothing. Sure, fancy designer stuff is what I prefer to sell, but I also sell good quality basics quite often that I find and then re-sell. If you know your sizes this should make it easy for you. Many sellers will sell several outfits together in a "lot" also, some with accessories that match! (I am too lazy for this, lol)
An example: a Jones New York, good quality silk skirt suit with the original tags on it, originally retailed for $200, I sold it on ebay for $30, a good deal for me since I picked it up for $7 and a good deal for the buyer who has a nice, modern skirt suit for a fraction of the retail cost.
I spend a lot of time (I mean a TON) in thrift stores and it can be exhausting. Ebay lets you search from home and get prices above thrift stores but often much lower than new and it is less tiresome. On the other hand, though, the cheapest thrift stores require the most "digging". Another option for you might be middle priced and more upscale "resale shops" where there is more organization but at a slightly higher price.
Now, I have a friend who seems to wear something of a "uniform" consisting of knit skirts and tops and sweater sets. Everything she has is navy, blue, black, or maybe dark green, dark purple, dark red. Then she mixes it up. With accessories like scarves, tights, boots vs flats, accent jewelry, and because she only wears certain colors anyway, I don't' think anyone would ever notice if she was wearing the 'same items' over and over. Plus her clothes are comfy but they look "nice" so she is fine with wearing these things on weekends also or for lunch with a friend, etc. Which basically goes along with what others have already said here but I just thought of my friend as a good example.
Women are more likely (in my experience) to be catty enough to pay attention to whether or not you are re-wearing things but if your clothes aren't obvious "stand out" things, like bold print blouses or bright dresses or whatever then it won't be obvious at all, if that is a concern.
A middle ground between thrift store shopping and full price retail might be ebay.
I am an ebay seller and I deal mostly in clothing. Sure, fancy designer stuff is what I prefer to sell, but I also sell good quality basics quite often that I find and then re-sell. If you know your sizes this should make it easy for you. Many sellers will sell several outfits together in a "lot" also, some with accessories that match! (I am too lazy for this, lol)
An example: a Jones New York, good quality silk skirt suit with the original tags on it, originally retailed for $200, I sold it on ebay for $30, a good deal for me since I picked it up for $7 and a good deal for the buyer who has a nice, modern skirt suit for a fraction of the retail cost.
I spend a lot of time (I mean a TON) in thrift stores and it can be exhausting. Ebay lets you search from home and get prices above thrift stores but often much lower than new and it is less tiresome. On the other hand, though, the cheapest thrift stores require the most "digging". Another option for you might be middle priced and more upscale "resale shops" where there is more organization but at a slightly higher price.
Now, I have a friend who seems to wear something of a "uniform" consisting of knit skirts and tops and sweater sets. Everything she has is navy, blue, black, or maybe dark green, dark purple, dark red. Then she mixes it up. With accessories like scarves, tights, boots vs flats, accent jewelry, and because she only wears certain colors anyway, I don't' think anyone would ever notice if she was wearing the 'same items' over and over. Plus her clothes are comfy but they look "nice" so she is fine with wearing these things on weekends also or for lunch with a friend, etc. Which basically goes along with what others have already said here but I just thought of my friend as a good example.
Women are more likely (in my experience) to be catty enough to pay attention to whether or not you are re-wearing things but if your clothes aren't obvious "stand out" things, like bold print blouses or bright dresses or whatever then it won't be obvious at all, if that is a concern.
We're ebay sellers, too - not clothes, no competition to you! - and that's a good idea. I do look around on ebay for clothes, sometimes. The other day, though, we picked up 5 tees for DH, a Penn State hoodie, 2 tops for me, and a sweater for me to reclaim the yarn for $5 & change at the Goodwill outlet. They sell by the pound.
A middle ground between thrift store shopping and full price retail might be ebay.
I am an ebay seller and I deal mostly in clothing. Sure, fancy designer stuff is what I prefer to sell, but I also sell good quality basics quite often that I find and then re-sell. If you know your sizes this should make it easy for you. Many sellers will sell several outfits together in a "lot" also, some with accessories that match! (I am too lazy for this, lol)
OK, both my wife and I work in professional offices and yes, we wear used clothing. We hit the thrift stores early and often and are surprised at how much of the stuff is either never worn or slightly worn.
The used items that I wear are shoes and occasionally high quality dress shirts. At the prices I am getting the clothes for, I have no problem ditching an item that I decide that I don't like. The rest of my clothes are bought from off-price retailers like Sierra Trading Post, TJ Maxx, Marshall's and the like.
My wife buys all sorts of things from Pendleton wool products and other high quality of items.
Yesterday's purchase was four men's shirts for $6 in original packaging from Dillard's.
You can get professional looking clothing at places like J. C. Penney and Belk and you do not need to pay a fortune.
Although you may know your size now, you say you are trying to lose weight, so I would probably buy fewer pieces than some of the other posters have suggested, but I agree with getting separates that allow you to mix and match. Be careful about ordering online unless it is from a manufacturer whose product sizing you know. Unfortunately, not all size tens are the same size. If you order from a catalog or online, pay attention to the measurements in the size charts.
When you think of "thrift shops" you might want to include consignment shops. Those are stores that sell items for people on commission. The selection is often a bit higher quality than the typical Goodwill store.
One thing you could do would be to ask some of the women with whom you work where they shop and what brands they like.
The biggest thing to keep in mind with work attire is that it should fit properly and fit the culture of the work place. Too tight, too low cut, too short is not a good idea.
How important is it to look "good" at an office? What about a pilled sweater? Or short pants? Or shirts getting threadbare at the elbows? Just how much wear can you get out of an item before you need to retire it?
I was in your same situation 40 years ago. I had two little girls (ages 4 and 5) and caring for them was my primary concern. But I also worked in an office where professional clothing was required. I made minimum wage and had a lot of bills, so I didnt have a "clothing allowance".
I bought a very cheap, used Brother sewing machine and started making my own clothes. I didnt have the money to take classes or buy instruction books so I just winged it. At first I made very simple A-line dresses and also made matching dresses for my girls. I progressed to making very nice fitted dresses, tops/skirts, etc -- and eventually no one could tell my outfits were homemade (or, as I preferred to call them, hand-made). I sewed late at night after my girls went to bed.
After @ 10 years life got hectic and I didnt have time to sew any longer. But I've started looking into getting another sewing machine and making my clothes again. They were far better-made than the expensive junk I've bought since I stopped sewing.
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I think you should keep in mind that your appearance COULD be keeping you from being promoted and making more money, so you should think of new clothing as a tool to get ahead.
I once worked with a young woman who had a masters degree and did her job well, but she was let go because she came to work looking like she rolled out of a dumpster every morning. An iron and a lint roller might have saved her job.
Hello all, I'm feeling a little stressed over my wardrobe, was hoping you frugal savy posters might have a few tips for me.
I have a closet full of clothes, probably ranging back to the 2001 timeframe, "in case I might need it" . Most everything has slowely been "worn to death". Or is cheap and shoddy / ill fitting etc.
I work in a semi-professional office place, it's obvious people have a clothing budget. I'm starting to feel weird wearing the same black tights and skirt everyday, and rotating through my shirts.
Yeah....I may need clothes . How can I figure out if it's worth it to buy clothes or if I just "want" them because I see everyone else in the office place looking polished. I would like to escape my frumpy ways but would have a fairly limited budget to do so. My shopping time is also limited as I have a baby, so is it better to spend the time picking through a thrift store and trying to cobble together a few outfits, or would it be worth it just to pick up a few new pieces at a deparment store, even though I'd pay a bit more, at least they'd be new and easy to locate on the floor.
How important is it to look "good" at an office? What about a pilled sweater? Or short pants? Or shirts getting threadbare at the elbows? Just how much wear can you get out of an item before you need to retire it?
Chadwicks online is a great place to put together a work wardrobe on a budget. Old Navy is great for basics. Good deals there. Target is good for polished basics with some quality to them.
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I really don't want to comment on your marriage...but.....I will say YOU are the mama bear of your family. if YOU don't take care of you, you're in no shape to take care of anyone else.
. Most everything has slowely been "worn to death". Or is cheap and shoddy / ill fitting etc.
. How can I figure out if it's worth it to buy clothes or if I just "want" them because I see everyone else in the office place looking polished. I would like to escape my frumpy ways but would have a fairly limited budget to do so. My shopping time is also limited as I have a baby, so is it better to spend the time picking through a thrift store and trying to cobble together a few outfits, or would it be worth it just to pick up a few new pieces at a deparment store, even though I'd pay a bit more, at least they'd be new and easy to locate on the floor.
