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View Poll Results: Could you have a romantic relationship with a nomad/VanDweller?
yes 5 10.64%
no 34 72.34%
maybe 8 17.02%
Voters: 47. You may not vote on this poll

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Old 02-23-2021, 02:18 PM
 
1,438 posts, read 734,268 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by fleetiebelle View Post
So they're basically "house poor" except that their house is a boat? And not being able to split up because of dependency and lack of opportunity isn't exactly a selling point.

FYI, a domicile is a permanant home, not a person.
I think it's more complicated than that, there is a video I saw a few months ago where a middleclass couple were talking about how they were on the verge of divorce before they became nomads, now the state of their RV told me they were middleclass to upper middleclass to start out and are possibly still have a good income of some kind. reading between the lines of what they were saying I get the impression that it was the fact that they are forced to work together to accomplish the most mundane things an accidental biproduct was a greater appreciation of each other which makes since as our instincts evolved from our hunter gatherer ancestors so the primitive parts of our brains still respond to the same things as zugzug and greshgura's did 40,000 years ago. so it's most likely even more so with the poorer nomads, who have to be creative and improvise 24/7 and they actually see each others contributions not just the results of them. you see your boyfriend build a fire and cook the fish he caught instead of seeing him leave everyday for 8 hours and come home plop down on the couch to watch "sports center".

 
Old 02-23-2021, 03:39 PM
 
Location: Phoenix, AZ
20,391 posts, read 14,661,936 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by ChileSauceCritic View Post
I think it's more complicated than that, there is a video I saw a few months ago where a middleclass couple were talking about how they were on the verge of divorce before they became nomads, now the state of their RV told me they were middleclass to upper middleclass to start out and are possibly still have a good income of some kind. reading between the lines of what they were saying I get the impression that it was the fact that they are forced to work together to accomplish the most mundane things an accidental biproduct was a greater appreciation of each other which makes since as our instincts evolved from our hunter gatherer ancestors so the primitive parts of our brains still respond to the same things as zugzug and greshgura's did 40,000 years ago. so it's most likely even more so with the poorer nomads, who have to be creative and improvise 24/7 and they actually see each others contributions not just the results of them. you see your boyfriend build a fire and cook the fish he caught instead of seeing him leave everyday for 8 hours and come home plop down on the couch to watch "sports center".
Or perhaps some mystery meat from the bucket?

Yanno, I actually throw together various meats and noodles at the Mongolian Grill, so actually what you've got going on there probably is not horrific.

But I gotta warn you. It sounds horrific. Like, "bucket o' byproducts" horrific. Might wanna refrain from telling ladies about how you eat on $50/month, like on a first date, there...just sayin...
 
Old 02-23-2021, 04:16 PM
 
1,438 posts, read 734,268 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Sonic_Spork View Post
Or perhaps some mystery meat from the bucket?

Yanno, I actually throw together various meats and noodles at the Mongolian Grill, so actually what you've got going on there probably is not horrific.

But I gotta warn you. It sounds horrific. Like, "bucket o' byproducts" horrific. Might wanna refrain from telling ladies about how you eat on $50/month, like on a first date, there...just sayin...
LOL nope I keep it simple I just say it's beef, pork or chicken , and the name of the dish I made, I leave out what parts of said animals I suspect it comes from
 
Old 02-23-2021, 11:09 PM
 
30,897 posts, read 36,958,653 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by ChileSauceCritic View Post
I'm not saying there are no frugal women, just saying dollar for dollar women spend more on ongoing expense's than men of the same income, such as on cars, apartments, houses, clothing, etc etc
You may be right, but I'm not sure I agree. I also notice women are (in general) way better at getting deals than men are when it comes to all the little expenses. Saving on a lot of small things adds up.

A trial run sounds like a good idea.
 
Old 02-23-2021, 11:18 PM
 
30,897 posts, read 36,958,653 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by ChileSauceCritic View Post
The way I see it the only women turned away by my income will be the shallow materialistic type, and in that case they are doing me a favor. My income is low but I still make to pay my monthly bills and feed myself, and do fun things and travel, I just have to plan waaaaay ahead for the travel part.
I'm not a woman (I'm a gay man) and few people would consider me materialistic, but your low income would be a negative for me (and mine isn't particularly high). It just means more limitations on what you can do and when you can do it, etc. Now, the fact that you can pay your bills and otherwise seem sensible about money (doesn't sound like you have any debts, etc.), would be a plus, for sure. And combining your low income with someone else's low income could potentially end up being a pretty decent lifestyle for 2 people. But women do tend to like being with men who make more than they do. It goes back to that sense of security thing.
 
Old 02-24-2021, 12:27 AM
 
1,438 posts, read 734,268 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by mysticaltyger View Post
I'm not a woman (I'm a gay man) and few people would consider me materialistic, but your low income would be a negative for me (and mine isn't particularly high). It just means more limitations on what you can do and when you can do it, etc. Now, the fact that you can pay your bills and otherwise seem sensible about money (doesn't sound like you have any debts, etc.), would be a plus, for sure. And combining your low income with someone else's low income could potentially end up being a pretty decent lifestyle for 2 people. But women do tend to like being with men who make more than they do. It goes back to that sense of security thing.
Well back when I was in Seattle I hung with an artsy crowd at this coffee shop, anyway there were a higher percentage LGBT than the general population probably around 20% and I can say with 70% certainty that you can learn alot about straight couples by watching gay and lesbian couples. I noticed most(not all) gay couples seemed to match up in looks but not so much in career level or even lifestyle, while lesbian couples were all over the place in comparative looks(lesbian porn lies) but usually closely matched in job/career/income level, there were exceptions but as a rule that's what I saw, but then again that was the 90's and it was a 21-30ish crowd mostly.
 
Old 02-27-2021, 11:30 AM
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by E-Twist View Post
Eeeeek! I'd run like hell from someone living like that!
Me too!
 
Old 02-27-2021, 11:32 AM
 
37,614 posts, read 45,996,704 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by ChileSauceCritic View Post
The way I see it the only women turned away by my income will be the shallow materialistic type, and in that case they are doing me a favor. My income is low but I still make to pay my monthly bill's and feed myself, and do fun things and travel, I just have to plan waaaaay ahead for the travel part.
I think you are quite incorrect in that assumption.
 
Old 02-27-2021, 02:13 PM
 
Location: Southern California
12,773 posts, read 14,983,025 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Forever Blue View Post
For the past few years now, I've been watching a YouTuber who chose to live in her van for the past 5 yrs now. She's a divorced lady w/ an adult son who lives on his own w/ his own family & she's not that close to her extended family, so it's no problem for her. She has nothing to tie her down to 1 place so it's great for her. I like seeing what she does out of curiosity & live a tad bit vicariously through her in a way. (She talks about what she does for the restroom & everything too.)

However, would I really want to live like that myself? No, so I wouldn't want to date someone in that situation either. They could be the sweetest person on earth, it's not about that. I'd just want/need more space & stability of it all. I can't just sit up in a van to relax all night permanently. That's NOT relaxing to me. Sure, it's a fun adventure for probably a few weeks at the most, but after that, that's it.

I've watched LOTS of other vandwellers on YouTube here & there too & some of them have some fancy vans, so if that's what they want, fine. I still don't want it myself. If I was totally alone in this world & had no one, I'd still just live in a small place somwhere (preferrably just a small home that I own...NOT a tiny home) & live out my life.
Quote:
Originally Posted by ChileSauceCritic View Post
Okay so your a good person to ask as you have the mindset of the typical woman in this regard but you seem to admire people in this lifestyle you just would not want it for yourself.

What do you think happens that causes women to be so gung-ho once they have been into that life for a few months to a year? From what I see in my research is very few women enter that life by choice initially.

Do you think it's as simple as they get used to not having any obligations and view the lack of creature comforts as a fair trade?

I do notice almost every woman that goes into that life by choice turn their vans into small apartments on wheels(Toilet, shower, mini oven etc), where as 2/3 of guys stop at a hotplate, bed and mini fridge.

To answer your questions...

- They seem to usually ENTER that nomadic van life because they have a way of making money remotely, which is the main thing (to earn a living), so they can be adventurous & travel all around it's it's in their will to do. Once they've been in that lifestyle for a while, they'll probably either love it or hate it. Not everyone's the type to do it, of course. For me personally, sure, it's nice & fun for 2-3 weeks maybe for a fun vacation...I've always wanted to rent an RV & go cross country. But then, I'd probably be sick of it, so no way would I want it permanently.

- I think the most important thing is a person's mindset. They have to desire it first, then anything else, they can make it work. Logically, someone thrown into it because they have to won't be as poassionate about it, but that doesn't necessarily mean they can't learn to love it more than they thought.

Some people are part-time nomadics. They work part-time & may still even have a permanent dwelling, but the other 1/2 of their time, they're on the road because they want more out of life than just existing & working because they have to.

If I ever tried something like that, I'd want to befriend a pal or two who can show me the ropes & we can even drive (in our own cars) together to places.

Not that I can't do it, but I'd probably soon grow tired of everything about it:

- confined spaces & wanting to fully stand up & stretch my legs WITHOUT having to always be outdoors all the time
- finding a safe place to park at night & sleep w/o getting bothered by cops knocking on doors, etc.
- the certain amount unsafeness of it all
- having to do laundry at laundromats all the time
- can never have a visitor over w/o just meeting at a public place or their place
- I love having a dog & things will be even tighter in space due to that, despite that dogs are great company for that lifestyle


I personally watch these ladies (but haven't watched the 2nd person in a LONG time):

https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCRp...QbP_YM4jYTVoag

https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCfq...KK8Ha1PeKi0_ig


This guy seems to be a VERY well-known guy in the van life/RV life/nomadic community. He heads events, etc.:

https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCAj...bkIR54hAn6Zz7A
 
Old 02-27-2021, 09:48 PM
 
728 posts, read 303,148 times
Reputation: 521
Quote:
Originally Posted by ChessieMom View Post
I think you are quite incorrect in that assumption.

Yup, he assumed the women were materialistic when they were being realistic. The women weren't expecting him to give them diamonds, fur coats and Cadillac cars.
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