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Old 06-03-2010, 10:34 AM
 
Location: Mid-Atlantic
1,820 posts, read 4,495,256 times
Reputation: 1929

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I have to admit... I am not a very frugal person, I have tried and tried, and I miserably fail.
I do however, like to give my relatives who have smaller children, my girls' good clothing that they no longer fit into.
I have never been one to use consignment shops (except for a rare furniture find or a handbag once in awhile) , however, I stay away from the clothing mainly. I figure I know people who can use mine for "Free", why "sell" them. That is just me though.
SO, in any case, I have a relative who has a daughter older than mine and when our girls were smaller, she would always hand over clothing, which I was extremely appreciative of.
In the past few years however, she has stopped. Nothing ever said, she just stopped.

I know she uses consignment shops frequently and am just assuming that she is selling her children's clothing now. That is fine of course, but is it wrong for me to ask her if she would mind giving us some of her daughter's play clothes?
It is the first time "we" (my husband & I) have ever really felt a little strained and our girls are growing out of their clothing so quickly these days.
It would be helpful (as it was in the past...) to have some of the hand me downs ,but I am not sure if that is considered to be faux pas to ask for them?
My relatives don't ask me, I just give them the clothes and they are always so grateful. They said that we have saved them so much money clothing wise.

Just curious if it would be considered rude or inappropriate to ask?

Thanks!
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Old 06-03-2010, 11:24 AM
 
1,135 posts, read 2,193,444 times
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Your friend might think you too proud to ask so doesn't offer. Why not ask if she would offer the clothes to you first and you would gladly "buy" them. She would probably be thrilled you would want them. Most people just get so busy they don't think out that far.

I paint houses for a living and when I see any customers with bags of clothes to donate I automatically ask for them. (I'm not putting my nasty paint clothes in my washer) It's gotten to the point they in turn tell their families to save clothes for me. Considering my customers talk about my clothes having more paint than the building, I think they are actually thrilled to give them to someone who uses/appreciates them. After all, they see me in them and beam saying things like , "oh, you're wearing George's shirt". Then they 'know" I needed the items and wasn't putting them in a resale shop myself!

I say go for it. My sisters all give their childrens clothing to family or co-workers and like feeling useful. Money is tight for everyone and most people want to find a way to help the next guy. After all, you have been giving and what goes around comes around.
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Old 06-03-2010, 04:03 PM
 
5,019 posts, read 14,121,612 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by NYMD67 View Post
Just curious if it would be considered rude or inappropriate to ask?

Thanks!
Not rude, but awkward perhaps?

Who knows, they may be feeling a bit pinched themselves these days and need the income from the consignment shop?

Or, perhaps they use "credit" from the consignments to keep their own daughter in nice clothing?

I'd hesitate to ask a family member. I would just hate to embarrass them or put them in a tight spot.

What I would do instead:

Join Freecycle. Offer up a few bags of my kids' hand-me-downs to make "friends" with the group. Then, post a "wanted" message to the group asking for the sizes needed.

good luck and best wishes.
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Old 06-03-2010, 07:54 PM
 
Location: FL
20,702 posts, read 12,551,652 times
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I wouldn't. I was going to suggest freecycle also.
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Old 06-04-2010, 12:55 AM
 
Location: The mountians of Northern California.
1,354 posts, read 6,381,246 times
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If you don't want to ask outright, you could host a swap meet with your friends and family. All the ladies you invite can bring a potluck dish. For the swap meet items, each person that brings in good, clean items, will get one ticket per item. They can then 'purchase' any items they wish with their tickets. Anything left over at the end of the night can be taken to Goodwill, etc.
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Old 06-04-2010, 04:37 AM
 
Location: Mid-Atlantic
1,820 posts, read 4,495,256 times
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Thanks everyone~
I haven't asked because I felt it was a little awkward...
Thanks for the suggestions though!
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Old 06-04-2010, 08:00 AM
 
3,045 posts, read 5,005,731 times
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I think it would be impolite. What if she could use the money? In essence, you are forcing her hand.

You could bring up how fast your kids are outgrowing their clothes. Just leave it at that.
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Old 06-05-2010, 12:44 AM
 
Location: Yucaipa, California
9,894 posts, read 22,038,726 times
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I havent bought new clothes (except socks, underwear & shoes) in yrs. Unfortnately i put on weight & cant fit into the clothes. Talk to your friend & if worse comes to worse offer a lil money. New clothes are expensive. I use iron on patches on my jeans. Im poorer then a illegal immigrant.
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Old 06-05-2010, 04:03 PM
 
8,652 posts, read 17,251,055 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by eagle7 View Post
I havent bought new clothes (except socks, underwear & shoes) in yrs. Unfortnately i put on weight & cant fit into the clothes. Talk to your friend & if worse comes to worse offer a lil money. New clothes are expensive. I use iron on patches on my jeans. Im poorer then a illegal immigrant.
Wanta do my yard?

And OP just ask over a cup of coffee....home made coffee that is....
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Old 06-10-2010, 09:36 AM
 
1,219 posts, read 4,220,575 times
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In my family, I have found that as kids get older, they tend to outgrow clothes at a slower rate-therefore, they're often pretty beat up by the time they outgrow them. I give away hand me downs, but my grade school aged kids wear everything out so much I'm embarassed to pass them on now!

That might be why. Or maybe she is turning them in for credit. I'd just look for some on freecycle, or hit tag sales.
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