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Recently, we received a "report" from a cousin...an ancestor report...and basically, there is a LOT wrong with it. I'm fairly certain quite a bit of it came from a, let say's speculative, tree on ancestry. Also, the closest her report comes to using citations is literally this: (findagrave).
So, how do you tactfully tell someone their stuff is wrong? And better still, is there any good way to tell them how to do it better? What kind of note to include if I send a report I generate with obvious footnotes, etc.?
My experience has been that most do not seek corrections. I now send a thanks for your info & just note some doesn't agree with what I have found.
If the person is someone I have a relationship with, I will share my work otherwise it tends to be casting pearls before swine type deal.
I do have one very distant relative who is quite nice. She is a rabid compiler & emails me frequently. I always thank her for her latest. And if something is tragically wrong, I will send her my research to contradict it. She is happy to cut & paste my findings into her reports. I enjoy her enthusiasm if not her research & authentication skills.
I guess I'm considering the "thanks, some info doesn't agree" and send a report from my file and let her do with it what she wants. I haven't talked to or seen this cousin in almost 20 years? Though I have seen and talked with her parents more often.
Hmm...will think about this. It bugs me that it is wrong and for all I know she has it public on ancestry or something where it will be grabbed by others and wrong forever. Ugh.
I have sometimes added notes to Ancestry family trees, indicating that I have conflicting information. Mostly, though, I try to contact them via messaging or e-mail identifying my connection to the person in the file, noting that there is a conflict, and requesting that we compare information to clear things up. I'm usually met with gratitude for the opportunity to validate the data, which potentially benefits us both. I don't assume I'm always correct. For all my good intentions and careful research, sometimes I miss things. That's another reason I keep my main Ancestry tree private. It's a work in progress with speculative connections that I hold onto for future research, and I'd hate to think that I had contributed to misinformation were someone to get ahold of that unverified data without understanding the potential for error. That said, there's a balance. If everyone kept their trees private, we'd all miss out on important clues that allow us to solve genealogy mysteries.
If they are geographically close to you, offer to meet and work together. I don't think you should just ignore it, this person may pass the erroneous information to others; it may be easier to fix it once than correcting all who would receive it. Genealogy is a tough nut to crack, reading obits from papers is just info that someone wrote; whether or not it was correct is another thing, but it's what was submitted to the paper.
Maybe this person needs guidance, in post title you said it was someone who was dabbling...it's easier to correct bad habits before they are fully engrained. Maybe when this person finds out it's not really easy, and that things need to be verified, they will decide to find a different hobby.
So, how do you tactfully tell someone their stuff is wrong? And better still, is there any good way to tell them how to do it better? What kind of note to include if I send a report I generate with obvious footnotes, etc.?
This person must be really touchy since you're trying to find a tactful way to tell them they're wrong.
I have a distant cousin on ancestry.com who frequently makes mistakes and had mangled our family tree pretty badly. She is touchy, too, and doesn't accept criticism very well. I have learned to ignore her and work around her. Whenever I find info that contradicts her research, I simply post it without explanation and I let her decide if she wants to correct her mistakes.
Personally, when I make a mistake I am more than happy to make corrections to my tree when someone points out a problem. I have also worked with other people on ancestry.com who feel the same way. They truly want to produce the best family tree they can and they will accept corrections or criticism.
Last week I dropped a note to lady on ancestry.com who had accidently declared a distant cousin's wife dead. This cousin died about 5 years ago in a car accident. (She was confused and thought his wife died in the accident with him.) The next day she corrected the mistake and sent me a thank you note. That's a real professional.
nearly all family trees have large amount of error, just don't worry about them and correct them as you go, it might be that your copy is the error, so just take them with a grain of salt
I have such an issue with leafers....my latest is one ancestor married "Anna Smith" a common name, and there is a marriage record from that area with "Anna Smith", and practically every single leafer is using that as my ancestors marriage record.
Problem is -- not that Anna Smith. The Anna Smith on the record married someone else completely... and if people would READ the record they would KNOW.
It doesn't help at all that three brothers moved to that area, married and started having children and ALL their girl children were named Anna something. So three brother having children and all the girls are Anna Elizabeth, Anna Maria -- and then add they're German and if one Anna dies... the next girl born is named the dead ones name.
And so -- while these people are technically relatives.... we have no real relationship other than by being cousins many degrees separated.
I think we have to face facts -- while a lot of people take this very seriously and want to do this right, a lot of people don't, and just want to fill the holes.
By the way -- I was tired of all the leaves on my tree from faulty trees. There was one guy that just started and he was showing up and he had 30+ "Sources" on each entry.... and each entry was Ancestry member trees. That did it... I discovered if you go up to the TOOLS and click on options you can turn off search other Ancestry Members trees. I did that and got REAL hints. Hints that led me to find the fact my 2nd great grandfather had a second wife ALSO named Elizabeth.
Amazing what can happen when you turn off the noise.
One of my degree subjects was history and then I went on to be an auditor. So I am very big on checking facts and providing supporting evidence, preferably original documents. I have had people disagree with me in the past often when the reality was not all that palatable (e.g. the relative who had 4 children out of wedlock with no record of who the fathers might be). If they want to disagree then fine. I am comfortable that I can defend my tree.
Generally speaking, I've discovered that people do not want to be wrong no matter how kindly or sincerely or diplomatically their errors are pointed out.
I've been on ancestry a lot lately, and keep bumping into a heavy user who uploads mistakes and also connects to others all the time perpetuating these mistakes. She considers herself an expert, but does not pay attention to logic and details. I messaged her once to ask - and I was very nice about it - what her source was for a new child she had added to a tree. Her reply was that she had gotten it from a census record. I went to the census and found she had the wrong family (similar names, but not correct), so I replied back to her with what I had found, again being very nice, and never heard a word from her. That child is still sitting on the wrong tree, and I've now noticed that others have attached that child to their trees. As you wrote, Tallysmom, "while a lot of people take this very seriously and want to do this right, a lot of people don't, and just want to fill the holes". It reminds me of Facebook in that some people do not care whom their "friends" are - they just want to have thousands of them.
Another group of "we're not wrong" are those who base fact on family tradition. Even with documented proof to dispute a tradition, sometimes these folks won't let go of tradition.
Although it frustrates the heck out of me, I'm learning how to just let it go :-)
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