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Old 05-01-2018, 01:36 AM
 
Location: colorado springs, CO
7,978 posts, read 3,694,202 times
Reputation: 23066

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It’s a guy named Steve.

Keeps showing up as a 2nd cousin to my my maternal uncle & a 2nd-3rd cousin to my sister & I.

Steve has a very Greek last name. My mom & uncle were 1st Generation American Greeks. My sister is enmeshed in the Greek community in Denver, which was or maybe still is; the 2nd largest in the US (1st is Chicago).

I showed my sister our matches, she saw Steve’s name & says “Oh, Steve! I know Steve! But ... he’s not ... related to us ...”

Well, yes he is. I haven’t bugged her about it because she is going to be a Yiayia for the first time next month & my 2nd oldest niece is having a Big Fat Greek Wedding in June. But after that, I plan on figuring out Steve.
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Old 05-01-2018, 10:49 AM
 
Location: The analog world
17,086 posts, read 11,076,327 times
Reputation: 22825
I personally have not, but I have a distant cousin whose DNA profile has led to many unexpected relatives, including a previously unknown half-sister who grew up down the block from her childhood home.
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Old 05-01-2018, 10:51 AM
 
15,358 posts, read 18,051,867 times
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I first discovered that I'm half Jewish even though there was no mention of that in our family history. From there I figured out that the father who raised me and to whom my mother was married was not my biological father. And that the brother I thought was my full sibling is only a half sibling.

I made contact with a woman who Ancestry.com said was "Close family--1st cousin" and it turns out that she's my half-sister on my biological father's side. We've been talking a lot and have plans to meet this summer. That whole side of the family appears to be curious about me and very welcoming.

All of the biological parents and their spouses are dead so there's no one to ask but also no one to be hurt by this information.

Like the poster above said, at my age, it doesn't really change much for me. From telephone conversations, my half-sister and I seem to be a fair amount alike and I'm interested in meeting her. Other than that, at this point it's just a curiosity.
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Old 07-30-2018, 11:11 AM
 
15,358 posts, read 18,051,867 times
Reputation: 25650
Although I posted a link on another page, I'm posting this here, again, for people who have discovered that their parents/grandparents aren't who they always believed them to be. For those who haven't found themselves in this position, it's easy to blow it off as "no big deal" and "it doesn't change anything." For some people it's not a big deal, and for others, it's huge. Also, one's perception of what happened and the implications can change over time.

This "secret" FB page has been very helpful to me. Everyone on there "gets it" and it's a judgment-free space to tell your story and hear others' stories.

https://www.theatlantic.com/science/...ernity/562928/

And this is a link to a story that ran on GMA this morning.

https://www.goodmorningamerica.com/n...ebook-56904359
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Old 07-30-2018, 11:48 AM
 
Location: Ozark Mountains
635 posts, read 611,383 times
Reputation: 787
Interesting stuff !
I just ran my great grandparents italian last names at FTDNA, and found several 5th italian cousins with the same last name.
;-)
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Old 07-31-2018, 09:48 AM
 
27,070 posts, read 26,352,600 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by AZDesertBrat View Post
Yup. Found out my dad is probably NOT my dad. Quite a shock after 75 years! My brother and I didn't match and neither did my cousin and I. My cousin's mom was my dad's sister. I DID match cousins on my maternal side but like my aunt used to say, "You never know who the father might be but you DO know who gave them birth". I have no interest in exploring this and will simply let it be. Besides, whoever my dad was he is probably long gone by now anyway.
how does taking a DNA test tell you who your father was?

Can you explain?
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Old 07-31-2018, 10:07 AM
 
Location: Colorado (PA at heart)
9,610 posts, read 15,054,597 times
Reputation: 12604
Quote:
Originally Posted by cremebrulee View Post
how does taking a DNA test tell you who your father was?

Can you explain?
Half your autosomal DNA comes from your father, and if you're male, all your Y-DNA comes from your father. Both autosomal and Y-DNA tests include matches with other people who have tested and share DNA with you. If none of those matches are recognizable as being on your father's side, then it's possible the man you thought was your father is not your biological father. Those same matches can help lead to your biological father. With autosomal DNA, particularly if someone close to you on your father's side has taken the test and doesn't match you, or if the person you thought was your full sibling only shares enough DNA with you to be a half sibling, it will be very obvious the man you thought was your father is not your biological father. With Y-DNA, your matches can help identify the surname of your biological direct paternal line.
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Old 07-31-2018, 10:15 AM
 
Location: 5,400 feet
3,577 posts, read 3,180,089 times
Reputation: 5215
Quote:
Originally Posted by cremebrulee View Post
how does taking a DNA test tell you who your father was?

Can you explain?

It doesn't tell you who, which is not what AZDesertBrat stated, it tells you that your DNA is only a 50% match to your siblings. In that case, it indicated that the person who was AZ's father was not the biological father. To find out specifically who that was, a lot more work needs to be done.


There is an instance in our family where someone's DNA was only a 50% match to her siblings and she was getting matches to others who were initially unknown. It turned out that her father was most likely not her biological father, She has narrowed it to a specific family by communicating with those previously unknown relatives.
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Old 07-31-2018, 10:39 AM
 
Location: Wisconsin
19,099 posts, read 20,289,145 times
Reputation: 48924
It happened to a friend/acquaintance of mine. The three siblings were shocked to discover that one of them had a different biological father. It was pretty awkward as their parents were still married and had been married for almost 50 years. The mother told her children that she was sexually assaulted at a party, while drunk, by one of her husband's friends. Whether or not that is the truth is sort of irrelevant as it brought up a lot of hard feelings/old arguments within both the immediate and the extended family.
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Old 08-05-2018, 01:08 PM
 
5,402 posts, read 5,027,143 times
Reputation: 11910
If keeping the paternity secret was to keep the child safe from her drug dealing gang member father, I get it. I know someone who found that out.
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