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Old 07-01-2011, 04:06 PM
 
1,072 posts, read 2,917,298 times
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Im in minnesota. but i miss the east coast so much(Philadelphia, Delaware,etc)but right now it just wouldn't make sense to move back since im doing so well financially. it wouldnt make sense to move in this economy period when you have a good job. But i have a baby on the way and the thought of it not having that family structure (cousins, aunts, grandparents) bothers me .
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Old 07-01-2011, 04:32 PM
 
Location: Kountze, Texas
1,013 posts, read 1,421,546 times
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Oh dear - it isn't easy to have a your own family without having that family structure around. Can someone come visit you? Can someone be there when it is time for baby? Do you go church? Have a church family? It was church family for me when I had my children - I was in TX and my family in MI. It was very hard - but with my church family (and husband) I made it thru. Hugs to you.
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Old 07-02-2011, 08:56 PM
 
1,237 posts, read 3,448,690 times
Reputation: 1094
The structure is present, just not down the street. You're starting your own branch of the family tree now - but with technology these days just because great aunt hilda can't hold the new baby doesn't mean she's not there.

Plenty of people stay where they are because their family is there even though the jobs are awful - only you can decide which is more important to you. Do you want to provide for your baby and branch of the family? Or have your whole family see the new one every time they want?
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Old 07-02-2011, 10:36 PM
 
88 posts, read 171,362 times
Reputation: 63
If you're unhappy...go back home. I get that this economy is terrible, but I firmly believe that you shouldn't do anything if it makes you miserable...you will have your family for support. Start re-connecting with the marketplace there vis social networking sites or just from people to start looking for work and what not...just my thoughts. You'd be surprised at what types of responses you will get by networking online.
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Old 07-03-2011, 12:04 AM
 
5,696 posts, read 19,143,332 times
Reputation: 8699
Meh...family is overrated. I lived in my hometown when I was pregnant with my son. I actually prefer to live away from family most of the time. Sure I had a babysitter when I wanted but that also came with unsolicited advice, people not respecting boundaries and the comparisons.

"Little cousin Timmy was crawling by that age, how come your son isn't?"
"What do you mean I can't smoke around the baby?! It's my damn house."
"The baby seemed fussy so I went ahead and gave him baby food even though the doctor and you told me not too. It doesnt matter I raised 3 kids and know what I am doing."
"If you rock the baby to sleep, he will never sleep on his own."

We finally escaped...I mean moved when my son was 10. Sometimes I get homesick especially if I talk to my mom and she says she and my sister went shopping etc. But it is short lived when I realize I missed the big blow out at lunch. Or just seeing the in-laws pretty much cures me as well. I stayed in my hometown far too long due to family. We were broke and struggling and it sucked. Where I live now is not my dream place but I like being able to pay bills on time, have nice things and even my son (after getting over his homesickness) likes the fact we can afford music lessons and the other activities. I understand what you are feeling but being a broke parent feels awful. But then again maybe you have lovely family and more job opportunities than I did. Consider it all very carefully and good luck!
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Old 07-03-2011, 04:52 AM
 
3,199 posts, read 7,826,851 times
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That is hard but congrats on the new baby and doing well financially. Those are 2 positive things. Is this your first baby? Maybe some unknown and fears are setting in as well so that is making you feel more homesick? I could be off but just a thought.
I agree with the other poster about visiting more often? Or have you looked at what jobs may be available in the area where your family is?
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Old 07-06-2011, 07:49 PM
 
2,634 posts, read 2,677,824 times
Reputation: 6513
Andrew Zimmern made Minnesota sound like a paradise. Of course he makes eating bugs sound like paradise also.
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Old 07-06-2011, 10:59 PM
 
Location: North Dakota
10,350 posts, read 13,940,699 times
Reputation: 18267
Quote:
Originally Posted by daboywonder2002 View Post
Im in minnesota. but i miss the east coast so much(Philadelphia, Delaware,etc)but right now it just wouldn't make sense to move back since im doing so well financially. it wouldnt make sense to move in this economy period when you have a good job. But i have a baby on the way and the thought of it not having that family structure (cousins, aunts, grandparents) bothers me .

You said it wouldn't make sense to move because you are doing well financially. Does this mean that moving back to the East Coast would be a major pay cut? If it would not be and you can afford to live there I would say go for it. If it would be a major pay cut or you can't afford to live there stay put and make some friends. You might find yourself a nice surrogate family!
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Old 07-06-2011, 11:29 PM
 
449 posts, read 1,698,851 times
Reputation: 201
I agree with WyoEagle. Still, it depends on you and your family. We moved back to be closer to family and the fact is everyone was busy with their own lives so we barely saw family or friends. Might be different if you all live in the same neighborhood. While I loved the area anyway and always yearn for it, the family I lived with weren't happy at all, finances were a bit tighter too. We weren't any closer to siblings, aunts, etc than when we lived miles away and my own family just couldn't make the adjustment.
After hearing daily complaining for a long period, we came back to the kind of place they saw as "home"

Maybe I'll try later when the nest is empty.
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