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Old 08-11-2011, 01:09 PM
Location: Somewhere in America
13,314 posts, read 12,213,094 times
Reputation: 22922


Originally Posted by Montana Griz View Post

It is my HO that 90% of all moves to a new local that end up in failure in one or more ways, are the result of (#1) acting on impluse; (#2) not doing enough research about the area IN ALL RESPECTS; #3 moving without having a job lined up; #4) moving without having a large-enough "Cash_Reserve" to get you over the "tough-times" of the 1st year.
None of those describe our situation at all. We're both counting the days until we move back to New York. We relocated last spring to South Carolina. We both miss so much from home. Families, friends, lakes, mountains, New England, 4 seasons, etc.

We didn't move on an impulse. We had been talking about it for over 4 years. We did tons and tons of research including several visits. Hubby still has his job. He works from home and travels so he can work anywhere in the country. We definitely had enough money. We built a new house here and sold our old one in NY. We bought a brand new car and furniture with monies from the sale. Oh and we went on vacation.

It's been over a year. And it's just not for us. We have friends and do things with local groups. I quilt and I'm in the guild. I'm even a chairperson for the quilt show. I also scrapbook and travel around doing that.

My husband hasn't met his latest nephew who will be 1 next week. That's very sad to us. We were very close before we moved. We saw his sister and her family just about every week. We shared holidays together. This just isn't working for us. The area is really nice, but it's not us. We're Yankees and have come to learn how much we really are New Englanders. We're from the NY/MA/VT border. So many things are just different here. Not good or bad just different. Other people have relocated here and love it and have no plans to ever leave.

Doesn't mean this is a failure. We've both learned a lot about ourselves. And we have learned to really appreciate things we gave up. I'll take how taxes and snow any day to have the Adirondacks and Finger Lakes back!
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Old 08-28-2011, 08:24 AM
1 posts, read 33,148 times
Reputation: 50
I moved from Ohio to Las Vegas in July 2010. It is now August 2011 & I am back in Ohio.

The 1 year I spent in Vegas was very difficult for me. I moved 2100 miles away from home with just my dog. At first it was exciting to explore a whole new area of the country. But then the homesickness & loneliness set in.

I still went out & did a lot of things by myself but kept telling myself that I needed to go home. I had a large group of friends & family back home that I am very close to. I was not used to being alone & I let it get to me. So instead of trying to make the best of it, I gave up and headed back east as soon as I could find a job.

But a weird thing happened as the moving day approached. I started thinking that I wasn't done with Vegas yet & still had some things to accomplish. I started thinking about how living in Vegas was what I always wanted & now I am giving up so easily, I have never been a quitter.

I knew in my gut that I should not be moving back. But instead of stopping it, I still moved back. I have been back in Ohio 1 week now & every day I remember why I left. Yes, it has been great seeing friends & family again, but I think I could have gotten the same satisfaction with a vacation.

The took a huge paycut to come back & have to replace things that I didn't bring back with me. It has been a very expensive lesson to learn. But it has made me realize alot of things. I did leave my job in Vegas on good terms & they did mention that they would take me back if I wanted to come back. So now I am debating moving back to Vegas.

My advice to anyone that is homesick is to go visit home for a while. There is a reason you left. Also before moving back home to really think if you have done all that you could to make your new location home.
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Old 08-28-2011, 09:21 AM
7,493 posts, read 10,539,493 times
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Thank you for your advice. I'm sure glad you have a chance to move back to Vegas. I don't have that chance for me when it comes to Florida. Of course the reason I moved back to my home state was solely economical; I couldn't get a job to save my life and should I have gotten one, I'd have been struggling financially (though I know in my heart I would've made it work, I love Florida so much). I wasn't the least bit homesick and moving back home rather than being a relief, was a slap in the face. All I want is to go back. Good luck to you.
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Old 08-28-2011, 03:32 PM
18,847 posts, read 33,836,065 times
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I moved for work reasons, did not really think about the place. I thought I would be fine any where...I think that if you are used to living in a big city, small town life is not for you, same as if you live in a small town, move to a big city, it is a big adjustment. I have decided I don't like big cities. Never really thought about it, until I had to live in one...I thought it would be really fun, and exciting, always doing fun things...no, you can't afford those things anyway...and there is constant traffic, housing is more expensive. I think, if I want to go to a big city again, I will just viist.
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Old 09-10-2011, 06:31 PM
1 posts, read 33,043 times
Reputation: 14
Originally Posted by ikthos77 View Post
I'm glad this thread is here. I just moved to the Bay Area from LA at the end of June. I left LA because I had hated it for years, felt trapped there, and wanted to emancipate myself. Now that I'm here in SF (East Bay) I realize all the good things about LA, and that it was really my home. I know people love the Bay Area but I find it dark, depressing, cold and kind of creepy in this way I can't put my finger on. I'm soooo homesick but I already have a job up here and the thought of getting a job back down there again is exhausting. I don't know how much longer I can make it up here though.....I can't picture myself living here long term. I guess the good thing is that it made me realize that LA was not so bad as I thought. I want to go home !!

Ikthos77, you read my mind. I'm trapped near Seattle, and must get outta here, back to southern CA.....my strategy is to find a condo in North OC (Fullerton? Brea?) and just go. I will sell the house in WA for whatever i can get and go home. Have to get thru the winter first, tho....

Don't ever feel like you messed up by moving. As many of these posters have already wisely said, sometimes we have to move away for awhile to realize where home is.
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Old 09-12-2011, 10:02 AM
Location: Here
414 posts, read 803,852 times
Reputation: 222
How about this? We moved 3 times in the past year and between two states. Such a mistake and now we feel completely lost.
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Old 09-13-2011, 01:00 AM
Location: Tucson/Nogales
20,274 posts, read 23,808,805 times
Reputation: 28040
In June 1968, 2 hours after H.S. graduation, I was standing at a freeway ramp, hitchhiking to L.A. Got a job washing dishes, I get my first check, and it bounced! Being that I give up too quickly, I went back to MN, was gone 2 months!

Tried it again in Jan. 1971, back to L.A., bought a used car which pooped out on me on the I-5 freeway 3 days later, out looking for a job. This time I only lasted 6 weeks. Back home again!

In April '72, bought a new car with little down, and with 3 friends took off for Denver. Homeless shelter for awhile, selling blood, but I did manage to find a decent job but not enough to get my own apt. and my car got repossessed. A friend from MN urged me to return and I did, after 6 months.

In may 1993, after acquiring some assets this time, I moved to Phoenix, found work, but after 3 years, I decided to move to where I've been now for 15 years and there's no returning to MN, not even my ashes!

It's true, if you're homesick, go back and vacation there. It might save you a lot of time, energy and frustration.

Last edited by tijlover; 09-13-2011 at 01:02 AM.. Reason: edit
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Old 09-13-2011, 04:32 PM
3,671 posts, read 6,807,976 times
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We moved to New Hampshire in 07 from Florida. I think from the start we had the bad luck bug. My husband moved up 4 months before I did to attended a paramilitary Police academy which I was not allowed contact with him except once a week for 3 min. monitored phone call. After I moved up 3 days later my car broke down an hour from my house in the mountains and I had no cell phone reception so had to knock on strangers doors till I could get a phone, it was also so cold there was ice on my window and I only had on a long sleeve shirt. Then it was an unseasonably warm summer that year and we ended up with only 1 window a/c unit that blew halfway through summer. We were only 24 at the time so we were BROKE with a capital B.

After that my husband was worked to death by the PD never having any holiday off (we were alone no family nor friends so I spent christmas thanksgiving and every holiday that year alone in my house) . No let me rephrase that he did have off christmas, we were packed and about to drive to Mass 3 hours away to see family and the drove to our house as we were getting in the car to tell him he needs to be on duty.

I had never seen snow and that ended up being the worst winter that part of NH had seen in 10 years they said (150 inches) ... Our house that we were renting was old and the insulation was bad so our heating bill was over $400 a month (this was also when gas was almost $5.00) ... the list goes on.. That was the jist of it.. I moved up in June of 07 and moved back to Fl in May of 08...

I think we're a glutton for punishment tho we're looking to go back.. but closer to family, not in the same region and for different reasons now (kid)
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Old 02-09-2012, 09:26 PM
2 posts, read 38,675 times
Reputation: 19
Originally Posted by mzpeach View Post
Ikthos77, you read my mind. I'm trapped near Seattle, and must get outta here, back to southern CA.....my strategy is to find a condo in North OC (Fullerton? Brea?) and just go. I will sell the house in WA for whatever i can get and go home. Have to get thru the winter first, tho....

Don't ever feel like you messed up by moving. As many of these posters have already wisely said, sometimes we have to move away for awhile to realize where home is.
Hi!! I ended up moving back to LA and am so happy here! I am starting a great new job in a week, found an apartment, and am loving the sun and being back with all my friends. Did you ever leave Seattle? I really pray everything works out for you....don't give up! Your SoCal pal, Ikthos77
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Old 02-10-2012, 05:38 PM
Location: Midwest
2,953 posts, read 4,681,651 times
Reputation: 1957
curious, say you get hired in a new city but you don't have a place to live...?? how do you all manage to find housing?? do you save up for an apartment before you get there in advance?
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