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I just escaped a bad dream for a living experience! Thought I would never be able to leave.....but after almost 2 years relocation happened about 3 weeks ago and it feels like paradise!! I can relate to the stories about everything going wrong....one after the other! Never will I relocate to that area again! I will never visit the area again either! So glad to make it out! It is a terrible feeling to lose hope and motivation from being planted in the wrong place. It's so exhilarating to finally break out though!!
One thing though....I have seen people move places...thinking moving will "fix" their lives. And they move...and still have problems at work...or can't find a GF or BF. Or their marriage is still bad. If you are unhappy where you are...take a critical look at what you can do to improve things where you are...
I'm curious if you've ever lived in a place where it seemed all your luck went completely out the window? ....Ever moved to a city that had the same effect on you? What happened? Did you give up and leave or stick it out?
I lived in the country of (southern) Cyprus for three years. Nothing goes right there, unless you can find a German or Russian to do it for you, maybe. The Greek Cypriots are friendly and smiling, and totally feckless.
The government from village level right up to the national level was a total mess, massively inefficient and bureaucracy like I have never seen.
Builders and repairmen were total losers, slow and did second rate work on their best days, with building techniques dating back half a century...and these were the best developers in the country. The local guys were far worse.
The country was a bargain bin tourist destination, and the streets were crowded with drunken Brits and their rugrats. The restaurants were wretched, burned, greasy grilled food a native speciality; "classier" restaurants serving foreign type food usually gave you a slab of friend meat with some glutinous sauce poured over it and called it Steak Diane or some other fancy name, but each one was the same deal a fried hunk of dead cow covered in a gloppy sauce.
I loathed the self-pitying, smug politics of the country, and their ability to erase any unflattering piece of history from the books - literally. The kids were taught the worst lying rubbish you could imagine. The Church was the richest business on the island, and had its hand deep into politics. And the politicians repeatedly shot their country in the foot, and then blamed the Turks or someone else.
If the Turks annex northern Cyprus it probably wouldn't be worse for the inhabitants than rejoining the southern part.
Location: Monterey Bay, California -- watching the sea lions, whales and otters! :D
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My "Bad" Place
I haven’t posted here for … well over a year, at least. (I have been busy moving, retiring, and setting up a new place.) I decided to browse City-Data again, and came across this thread. Wow, did it hit a nerve!
My “bad” place was Phoenix, Arizona. I moved there for a job I truly desired. There were some good things there – the place I worked at and the people I met at work. But I never felt happy.
I had moved from Western New York to Phoenix. I only lasted about two years. I truly wanted to make it work.
Yes, there was culture shock – I had never lived in a desert before. But it was that awful oppressive feeling that I did not “fit.”
While there, I never felt right. I was depressed, and... my mother died back east in a botched operation…. That was kind of the final straw. I just remember crying an awful lot. I could not shake that undeniable sadness and loneliness I felt there.
I moved to Boulder, Colorado – not that far away, but it was amazingly different and happy! I actually regret having moved from Boulder.
Then I tried Phoenix again after leaving Seattle (yes, I’ve moved around). I left Seattle for personal reasons (the weather was not the main factor, although I was relieved to be out of the gloom). I got to Phoenix, and it started all over again. I couldn’t get a job, a place, it was depressing, and it was like deje vu. Finally, one of my friends, also from the east coast who found Arizona wonderful for him said, “This is not the place for you. I think you should find another place to live – it is too difficult for you here.” That made me at least realize I wasn’t crazy.
And then, my last time there was when a sister of mine had moved there, and decided to leave for a job (it almost seemed like Karma that she chose to pull her kids out of a high school they loved to get her husband a better job when he was already a CEO). I went there for the funeral because her son died during a “good-bye” camping trip – he did not want to move from there – and there he remains….
I figured my mother and my nephew died there. I had a miserable time. I loved the one place at which I worked, but other than that, it seemed I was lonely, depressed, often would just start crying, things just didn’t work out. One block after another. And then when my mother died, I said, “That’s it!” and I moved to Boulder – where it was dramatically different.
I know this sounds a little hokey, but have any of you heard of Astrocartography? It is a way to see where your planets are in different places. Ironically, I had Jupiter (good things) and Saturn (bad things) crossing over themselves right there in Phoenix. The “good” was the job and those people; the bad was everything else. I will never live on a Saturn line again! In Boulder, NO Saturn line!!
I honestly do believe that there are “good” and “bad” places for us. I am now in a middle-ground place – it’s nice, but it’s not how it was when I lived in Boulder, although it is similar. However, frankly, I’m scared to start over in another unknown place! At least here I know it went okay, and I have a beautiful environment and friends. If I want mountains, I have them easily accessible here.
It is weird how some places actually DO seem cursed! I just think that for whatever reasons, whether they be metaphysical, physical or just who knows, that some places ARE better and worse than others. So, if you ARE stuck in a place that just doesn’t seem to go your way, you seem to always be going upstream, and it’s been awhile of really trying to make it work, I think it is logical to leave. If it’s really bad there, odds are it may be okay someplace else.
And the worst thing is, like some have said, you STILL sometimes feel drawn to some of those places (and I do believe in Karma, so I think that is part of the draw). Often I have thought about going to Phoenix for workshops, or just to visit the desert…..but I honestly do not want to set foot in Arizona again. It is plain scary to me!
I haven’t posted here for … well over a year, at least. (I have been busy moving, retiring, and setting up a new place.) I decided to browse City-Data again, and came across this thread. Wow, did it hit a nerve!
My “bad” place was Phoenix, Arizona. I moved there for a job I truly desired. There were some good things there – the place I worked at and the people I met at work. But I never felt happy.
I had moved from Western New York to Phoenix. I only lasted about two years. I truly wanted to make it work.
Yes, there was culture shock – I had never lived in a desert before. But it was that awful oppressive feeling that I did not “fit.”
While there, I never felt right. I was depressed, and... my mother died back east in a botched operation…. That was kind of the final straw. I just remember crying an awful lot. I could not shake that undeniable sadness and loneliness I felt there.
I moved to Boulder, Colorado – not that far away, but it was amazingly different and happy! I actually regret having moved from Boulder.
Then I tried Phoenix again after leaving Seattle (yes, I’ve moved around). I left Seattle for personal reasons (the weather was not the main factor, although I was relieved to be out of the gloom). I got to Phoenix, and it started all over again. I couldn’t get a job, a place, it was depressing, and it was like deje vu. Finally, one of my friends, also from the east coast who found Arizona wonderful for him said, “This is not the place for you. I think you should find another place to live – it is too difficult for you here.” That made me at least realize I wasn’t crazy.
And then, my last time there was when a sister of mine had moved there, and decided to leave for a job (it almost seemed like Karma that she chose to pull her kids out of a high school they loved to get her husband a better job when he was already a CEO). I went there for the funeral because her son died during a “good-bye” camping trip – he did not want to move from there – and there he remains….
I figured my mother and my nephew died there. I had a miserable time. I loved the one place at which I worked, but other than that, it seemed I was lonely, depressed, often would just start crying, things just didn’t work out. One block after another. And then when my mother died, I said, “That’s it!” and I moved to Boulder – where it was dramatically different.
I know this sounds a little hokey, but have any of you heard of Astrocartography? It is a way to see where your planets are in different places. Ironically, I had Jupiter (good things) and Saturn (bad things) crossing over themselves right there in Phoenix. The “good” was the job and those people; the bad was everything else. I will never live on a Saturn line again! In Boulder, NO Saturn line!!
I honestly do believe that there are “good” and “bad” places for us. I am now in a middle-ground place – it’s nice, but it’s not how it was when I lived in Boulder, although it is similar. However, frankly, I’m scared to start over in another unknown place! At least here I know it went okay, and I have a beautiful environment and friends. If I want mountains, I have them easily accessible here.
It is weird how some places actually DO seem cursed! I just think that for whatever reasons, whether they be metaphysical, physical or just who knows, that some places ARE better and worse than others. So, if you ARE stuck in a place that just doesn’t seem to go your way, you seem to always be going upstream, and it’s been awhile of really trying to make it work, I think it is logical to leave. If it’s really bad there, odds are it may be okay someplace else.
And the worst thing is, like some have said, you STILL sometimes feel drawn to some of those places (and I do believe in Karma, so I think that is part of the draw). Often I have thought about going to Phoenix for workshops, or just to visit the desert…..but I honestly do not want to set foot in Arizona again. It is plain scary to me!
Informative post!
Phoenix AZ sounds a bit like S florida, when we lived there, the weather was great but some neigborhoods were very seasonal and it was just odd...in the subdivison for Xmas the neighborhood was half deserted.
Sometimes places like Taos New Mexico sound nice for retirement, but Id be afraid it was seasonal, what else about AZ was wrong?
Ur lucky to be in Monterey
Yes. This has been a nightmare across the board and although it will involve some financial risk, I'm out in about 3 months after getting stuck with the economic downturn. It seems like there is something bad happening constantly and I am exhausted from it. This is a horrible place and the people just keep saying "Well, it's like this everywhere." What a joke! I have actually been other places and no place compares to this. I call it "The Gateway To Hell." I don't even want to go into all the details of the horror because I don't want to relive them. Thus, "AnywhereElse" and I'm past due! I had to come back to edit when I went to leave the computer because I said "Another day in purgatory!" which is how I greet the morning. In this case, it isn't just me as many have told me that I need to see the movie "Deliverance" but my husband said I don't want to see it. So, for those who have seen it, you'll understand "AnywhereElse" I guess. Where do I get the courage to face another day here? I have no idea but it is wearing thin!
taking a financial loss is worth it right now, the economic downturn is going to last awhile from what many experts say, so better to be in a place where ur happy.
good luck. .
I didn't move to fix any financial or marital issues......only geographic! We had moved from Boulder, Colorado to the Ozarks to be closer to my aging parents (both are in their late 80's but in excellent health and able to travel). My sister also moved to the area from Monterrey, California shortly after I did. We both thought it would be great to be closer to our parents and each other..... we had a parallel experience. Nothing seemed to fit and it was dreadful to say the least. We are both from the west and couldn't seem to find a comfort level no matter how hard we tried. She moved back to California about 4 months before I was able to move back west. It was easier with her there and after she left it was even worse. I am close to an area where I lived before so I knew what to expect. I felt the difference as I was leaving the Ozarks. My heart felt light again. I didn't look in the rear view mirror and will never go back!! I do believe that certain areas are not healthy for some!!
yes, absolutely, New York City. It all started even before I moved there (on my 1st visit). Won't go into all the details but it was one really bad, horrible thing after another. I was lucky I got out of there alive and still sane. This was like over 40 years ago and I have never gone back, nor will I ever.
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My "Bad" Place
I actually regret having moved from Boulder. 
