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Some people stay in the same area but move several times for better houses and neighborhoods. I don't think that is settling.
I am glad I stayed in one area for a long time, 50+ years. It was nice to have roots and family. When that changed by death and other reasons I decided to move. I am very happy with where I moved to and am glad I grew up and lived where I used to live. I think being from somewhere is important.
I've met many people in the last few years that moved about a dozen times. I think they have something missing in their lives. When we sit around and talk about the past and the people we knew they really don't have much to add since they never really knew anyone. They met a lot of people but never knew them.
I never really met anyone that stayed in one area and never traveled.
I think if you stay somewhere you don't like, that is settling.
if you're happy and content where you are, that is not settling.
definition of SETTLE: "adopt a more steady or secure style of life, especially in a permanent job and home."
I agree.
I have a friend that moved a lot growing up - every 4 years for dad's job. She told me that she will NEVER move her kids, she's been in the same town now for 16 years so I believe her!
"Would you say that again if you had been a military brat?".
I was a military brat and moving is in my blood. Yes, it's hard to start in a new school - but each move is a fresh start, a new adventure.
After my son was born, I stayed put until he was in high school - when the opportunity came to leave, he was ALL for it. He's left again, 6 hours away to go to college.
I believe he must have that moving gene as well!
Of course, my non-military family in my hometown - thinks we are all crazy.
Actually, I'm starting to feel restless myself. Every time I visit a new town, I wonder what it would be like to live there.
In general? Absolutely not.
In the specific? It depends (a lot) ...and mostly on where you start from.
Should you (everyone) cultivate broader experiences of other places?
Yes. Everyone and a lot of it. Without this experience you can't know the rest.
I agree with your qualified sentiments. Relocation is actually a spiritual thing. Without making a blanket statement about people who have never tried another part of the country (or world), I find a certain smugness in people whose lives and interests suggest total unawareness of and lack of concern with the larger world. The smugness in some cases may just be innocent ignorance. With innocent folk content with No Place Like Home, intellect or background or other limitations are offset totally by huge, great hearts. The same goes for people who leave their home-world but return--even leave it and return many times!
But in other cases, particularly in my region of origin, a mindset content with and in fact reliant on small-town existence as the Be-All and End-All...almost always goes hand in hand with ambition, self-centeredness, hardness, and even personal corruption. People who are aware of the larger world but who purposely ignore it, I avoid like the plague. They are small-minded by choice.
It's generally pretty easy to distinguish great-hearted area natives from small-minded ones. Great-hearted people smile a lot , no matter how far they have traveled, or how many times they have moved.
To the people who have moved many times in their lives, do you agree?
Does staying in one place amount to "settling?"
The article linked to is a spew of sophomoric gush by someone who is called a "Senior Lifestyle Writer" but looks like she may be twenty-two and sounds like she is sixteen. Her LinkedIn info suggests that she has worked a year a half at two different jobs. Perhaps this is why her idea of "settled" is so downright wacky.
I have moved more than her requisite five times in life, and I think she's full of it and needs to change her enema formula.
The article linked to is a spew of sophomoric gush by someone who is called a "Senior Lifestyle Writer" but looks like she may be twenty-two and sounds like she is sixteen. Her LinkedIn info suggests that she has worked a year a half at two different jobs. Perhaps this is why her idea of "settled" is so downright wacky.
I have moved more than her requisite five times in life, and I think she's full of it and needs to change her enema formula.
I had a similar reaction. She has some good points, but I didn't like her comparing moving to leaving a relationship. It seemed like excuse-making for commitment phobes.
It depends. First, it depends on why you move. If its a 'have to' since you can't afford the place, or your family is going splitsville and so on, the move may not be one of joy, or not. Maybe its getting a fresh start, or maybe you loved where you lived and didn't want to go. Maybe its the family house and your siblings want their money out of it and you'd just rather live there. We're all individuals and what works for one may not for someone else.
And it depends on how far. Can you easily go back and visit? You won't feel the same about the place, since you moved on and there will be a seperation there, but it will be for the people. Can they come visit you easily? Will they? Will you eventually drift apart? Does that matter?
Some people are deeply intergrated into family and friends, and its hard to leave them. Some can find new friends easily, or are okay with phone calls. They'll do fine, and might need that new start.
And some of us shouldn't. Some of us are deeply a part of a place and its people and will never feel right to leave. If they are happy and satisfied then there's no reason for them to go. And some of us gain from it. We fall into same old same old routines. We don't feel a connection to the place. We have specific things we'd like to see behind us. We Should move on.
When you move, your whole life is shaken up. You have new people, new places, new experiences. It can be wonderful but if you don't want any of that, then its not necessarily going to help. If even if its not what you expected, its still now home, then you won.
The thing is we never fully really and absolutely know unless we try it. Sometimes the best thing, if you know your not wedded to the place you are, is to Take that Chance understanding that there is no guarentee it will turn out how you hope.
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, no matter how far they have traveled, or how many times they have moved.
