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Hi everyone,
I am in a dilemma since i want to move out of state. I am 19 currently employed as an Electrician full time living in northern New Jersey. I want to move to Northern Colorado since I am bored and tired of New Jersey. The problem is that my parents don't want me to move out because they love me dearly. I am a good kid and have my head on my shoulders right, never been arrested, in legal issues, or any form of addiction. I got good grades in school and I have taken a few night classes at the local community college. The reason I want to move is because Colorado fits my interests way better then Jersey. I am an active outdoor enthusiast/ adrenaline junkie and love: Hiking, Backpacking, Rock climbing, Skiing, White water kayaking, paddleboarding, Biking, Running....(you get the idea I love the outdoors) Jersey on the other hand is small, overcrowded and has small mountains(more like hills). Also I like to consider myself a healthy person in my eating habits, and also do try to be environmentally concise/friendly. (more pros for Colorado).
Work stuffs:
Also I am an apprentice Electrician and to become a licensed Electrician in NJ you must work 5 years in an apprenticeship. Colorado you only have to work 2 years in apprenticeship and can become a licensed residential electrician. My hours worked in NJ can transfer to CO making me eligible to become a licensed Electrician in CO (pros here being more money, and can go out on my own. More pros for Colorado is that it is exploding in population right now making a high demand for tradesmen, like me and through my research there are tons of Electrical companies looking to hire. Since population is expanding if i buy any form of real estate it should substantially go up in value in my lifetime. Also future plans for me is to get into house flipping and house rentals as well.
I've been told that I am very responsible with money and have a decent amount in savings that I've put away in the time spent working. Also I'm the only 19 year old I know that has set up their own ira and maxed the contributions since I made the account. The only thing really holding me back is my family since they all live in NJ. I have a few close friends living in Colorado so I won't be completely in the dark socially there. I believe it is feasible and just need to convince my parents that this would be the best thing for me.
Thank you for reading my long post you are all awesome. Thanks in advance for any responses.
Location: East of Seattle since 1992, 615' Elevation, Zone 8b - originally from SF Bay Area
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You are legally entitled to move out at 18, and many move out as soon as they can. I moved out at 19 myself, and was glad to be on my own and start being responsible for myself. All parents eventually have to let go of their kids and let them do what makes them happy.
Of my 3, 2 left at 19-20, though they did stay within an hour away. That was their choice, we didn't pressure them to stay close by.
I suggest making a list of companies that are hiring and sending them a brief email (and resume) outlining your experience and reasons for moving (just list 2 - 3). Send this email (or letter & resume) about a month before you go on a working vacation to CO. Then go out to CO for a week, go to interviews (hopefully), and while you are there, go in person to companies that are hiring that you may not have heard from. Also look at some apartments and get a better feel about the cost of living. Of course, you can also do research with the data on this forum.
I'm going to suggest Colorado Springs because it's growing but it's not as over-priced at Boulder or some of the resort areas. You're still close to plenty of hiking, skiing, and rock climbing.
One you have a letter with a firm job offer, then go to your parents. Remind them that you love them, but you are legally an adult, and that you are going to CO, not joining the army and heading for a war zone. Ask for their blessing, but be prepared for some drama. Stick to your guns. Calmly tell them you will be moving out on X date and then do it.
Another thought: also write out a budget for a year and when you have you job offer in hand, show them the letter and your budget. Explain how you will be making enough to be living on your own, if such an argument will carry any weigh with them.
It sounds like you're level-headed, but also take a few minutes to calmly think through their objections, and you don't have to share them with us. It's important to be clear about whether they see real problems or they're just having a hissy fit because they are losing their son (and maybe some free labor). For example, if your mom and dad are concerned about the move because you aren't a very good judge of people and have been burned, then that's an objection you should take to heart and work on before moving (you could read some books, maybe form a Meet-Up group).
On the other hand, if mom is going on and on, "Oh, who is going to drive little Jerry and Bobby to their tutoring and x, and y, and z," then you need to be calm but offer some alternatives, like maybe she can split the driving with other parents who have kids in those activities.
I don't know. I'm just trying to give some examples. I often see both sides of this discussion in the real world, but we're only seeing your side on this forum.
In any case, good luck! I'm very impressed with what you've accomplished so far. You know what you need to do to advance in your career, and you're clear about how a move to CO would benefit you personally and career-wise. You're head and shoulders above the usual: I want to move somewhere warm. How do I get a job out of state? I'm a server, but I don't really like it, blah, blah, blah.
Hi everyone,
I am in a dilemma since i want to move out of state. I am 19 currently employed as an Electrician full time living in northern New Jersey. I want to move to Northern Colorado since I am bored and tired of New Jersey. The problem is that my parents don't want me to move out because they love me dearly. I am a good kid and have my head on my shoulders right, never been arrested, in legal issues, or any form of addiction. I got good grades in school and I have taken a few night classes at the local community college. The reason I want to move is because Colorado fits my interests way better then Jersey. I am an active outdoor enthusiast/ adrenaline junkie and love: Hiking, Backpacking, Rock climbing, Skiing, White water kayaking, paddleboarding, Biking, Running....(you get the idea I love the outdoors) Jersey on the other hand is small, overcrowded and has small mountains(more like hills). Also I like to consider myself a healthy person in my eating habits, and also do try to be environmentally concise/friendly. (more pros for Colorado).
Work stuffs:
Also I am an apprentice Electrician and to become a licensed Electrician in NJ you must work 5 years in an apprenticeship. Colorado you only have to work 2 years in apprenticeship and can become a licensed residential electrician. My hours worked in NJ can transfer to CO making me eligible to become a licensed Electrician in CO (pros here being more money, and can go out on my own. More pros for Colorado is that it is exploding in population right now making a high demand for tradesmen, like me and through my research there are tons of Electrical companies looking to hire. Since population is expanding if i buy any form of real estate it should substantially go up in value in my lifetime. Also future plans for me is to get into house flipping and house rentals as well.
I've been told that I am very responsible with money and have a decent amount in savings that I've put away in the time spent working. Also I'm the only 19 year old I know that has set up their own ira and maxed the contributions since I made the account. The only thing really holding me back is my family since they all live in NJ. I have a few close friends living in Colorado so I won't be completely in the dark socially there. I believe it is feasible and just need to convince my parents that this would be the best thing for me.
Thank you for reading my long post you are all awesome. Thanks in advance for any responses.
Obviously you do want a job lined up first, but you're approaching it the wrong way. Instead of asking your parents if you may leave, you should be saying "I have a job offer in Colorado, I'll probably move out in two months".
It is you who has to initiate the transition from asking "permission" to informing your parents of what you intend to do, and letting it sink in.
I agree with above poster, you just have to let them know of your decision. You are an adult with a good head and career started so they should have little say. I agree to get some interviews lined up and go on vacation there, with them would be nice. It really is no different if you had chosen to go college in a different state. It will be hard but it is natural and they will adjust. It will be easier on them adjusting since you are stable and mature.
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