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First, I am REALLY unhappy if I am living somewhere I hate, so I can empathize with the OP.
But -- and this doesn't only apply to the OP -- I am always surprised when I see posts like this (or even worse, when there is a disagreement about how many kids to have, if any). I know that people "fall in love", but before people marry, shouldn't they discuss and agree on such important decisions?!
(Btw, in my case, the moves I hated were (1) when I was a child and my parents forced me to move from Ohio, which I loved, to SoCal, and (2) when I agreed with my then-husband to care for his elderly grandparents in Alabama which was a HUGE mistake for many reasons, but -- fortunately -- he agreed it was a big mistake, too, and we moved out as soon as we could, but in short, it was eight months of hell on earth for me.)
Last edited by katharsis; 09-27-2019 at 07:15 PM..
That is simply not true! (In my opinion, of course.)
I have always lived life in the suburbs, but my heart has always been in a New England-type countryside. Do you really think that I would be happy living in downtown Chicago or Las Vegas? Or, as I just wrote above that actually happened, in racist Montgomery, Alabama in 1973?
That is simply not true! (In my opinion, of course.)
I have always lived life in the suburbs, but my heart has always been in a New England-type countryside. Do you really think that I would be happy living in downtown Chicago or Las Vegas? Or, as I just wrote above that actually happened, in racist Montgomery, Alabama in 1973?
I don't think so!
I could survive in a lot of places, but it doesn't mean that I'd be happy.
That is simply not true! (In my opinion, of course.)
I have always lived life in the suburbs, but my heart has always been in a New England-type countryside. Do you really think that I would be happy living in downtown Chicago or Las Vegas? Or, as I just wrote above that actually happened, in racist Montgomery, Alabama in 1973?
I don't think so!
You could absolutely be happy in Las Vegas! Wait sorry were you saying you like to be bored in the country? Never mind you’re right LOL just teasing you!! I totally agree with you though, not every personality type will be happy everywhere.
I am not happy somewhere if it’s a struggle to find restaurants open past 10 pm. I love Vegas because it’s a night owl’s paradise and never boring, yet you can be in a peaceful quiet neighborhood and relax too just minutes from the action. I’m definitely more of a home body but that’s exactly why I like to live somewhere exciting - I wouldn’t and didn’t bother to leave the house in 1) Poor weather climates (most of the US, which has pretty terrible weather when you think about it, outside of a few states), 2) Any town and most cities, which are also boring outside of a few exceptions. It takes a lot to get me out of the house much - like the Strip. If it’s not that exciting, I’m probably not going out lol.
...We have a long term plan to move closer to where I'm from for .... but believe we will still be hear for at least another 5 years to build up money for the move from the current business.
At times I just feel desperation to get out of where I am and don't think I cant stand over 5 years more but I don't know whether this is logical or not....Does it seem reasonable for me to want to move?
I think it's extremely reasonable. In fact, I can totally relate. I too am stuck where my spouse wants to live, but would prefer to be back to where I'm from. The "waiting game" has been hard, but I'm learning to deal with it.
I agree wholeheartedly with katharsis. Being happy isn't possible anywhere and everywhere. Those who think all locations can be enjoyable simply have never left their bubble, and have never experienced a difficult location. To put it bluntly, they are clueless.
Try to be patient, do all you can to make your current location as bearable as possible, visit your home location as much as possible (and emphasize how important that is), and remember that someday you'll be in a better place. See it as an exercise for personal growth and endurance. You can actually turn it into a positive. And do anything you can to get a head start. Even little preparations help, and you can visualize that you're already on that path, even if just the early stages. I've found that moving forward, even tiny steps, makes me feel better, like I've started the longterm process.
I think it's extremely reasonable. In fact, I can totally relate. I too am stuck where my spouse wants to live, but would prefer to be back to where I'm from. The "waiting game" has been hard, but I'm learning to deal with it.
I agree wholeheartedly with katharsis. Being happy isn't possible anywhere and everywhere. Those who think all locations can be enjoyable simply have never left their bubble, and have never experienced a difficult location. To put it bluntly, they are clueless.
Try to be patient, do all you can to make your current location as bearable as possible, visit your home location as much as possible (and emphasize how important that is), and remember that someday you'll be in a better place. See it as an exercise for personal growth and endurance. You can actually turn it into a positive. And do anything you can to get a head start. Even little preparations help, and you can visualize that you're already on that path, even if just the early stages. I've found that moving forward, even tiny steps, makes me feel better, like I've started the longterm process.
Best of wishes and luck to you!
Wherever you go, there you are. Besides, you left your bubble right?
If you're unhappy with your situation, either change your situation or change how you feel about it.
I abhor having to deal with a popular racial attitude (meaning everyone feels that way). I'm afraid I'd have to do something ugly, like join a church that's predominately the other race, or blare music that represents the disliked race.
I hope you have a voice in all this. Congrats on the baby!!
I only got to page 3 so don't know if others have mentioned this but if you do end up splitting up over this, most courts will not allow you to leave the area with a baby against his wishes so you may be stuck there. This is something I'd think seriously about right now (it may however be too late).
Zara where are you from and where is the husband from?
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LOL just teasing you!! I totally agree with you though, not every personality type will be happy everywhere. 
