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If you just want to get things off your chest-buy a diary. If you post in a forum then people assume you want or need advice and are kind enough to offer you that plus compassion. Accept it for that and don't get defensive.
Your family will always be your family. You could typically get back to them within a few hours on a plane. If an emergency comes up it will no matter where you live.
I had an aunt and 2 uncles pass away this last year after I moved thousands of miles away. I have a cousin who is only 19 and dying. She has only days to live. Now I can't and couldn't change any of that if I were there. I can and do call my family members to let them know I'm thinking of them. Such is life-it is for living. I don't dwell on death. It is inevitable.
I too am a pet lover and would probably miss my pet more than any human family member. Any reason you can't take your cat with you?
Denver is really nice and your very lucky to already have not only a boyfriend there but a JOB! Try to think on a more positive note and push away the negatives. Think happy!
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Originally Posted by SubaruFiend
So I've been pumped to move to Denver from Chicago since I first started planning it in about July. I want to be there sometime in February. Well last night suddenly it hit me that I'm scared. Not so much to move, not really scared of the expense of it or where I'm going to be (I already know where I'm going to live.) I'm not scared of the job situation cuz I'll be transfering within my company.......... I'm scared to leave everything I know.
I was sitting around the kitchen table last night with my mom and dad and my sister and brother and we were all playing with the dogs and laughing and having a good time (A rarity in my house)....... and later on when I tried to go to bed I was laying there and it dawned on me how badly I will miss my family, my dogs, my cat, my extended family when I move. I know I get aggravated with them most of the time because we're a 5 person family living in a relatively small house for our size. Add to that mix two very large rambunctious dogs and it gets a little crazy in the house. Most of the time I can't stand being so cramped and having like NO privacy.
But I was laying there last night thinking about how I'll be 900 miles away and I won't be able to see them whenever I want and this sort of made me sad. (I especially got sad about missing my cat. He's a little siamese, tiny, so cute, such a good cat...... he's a loving little thing, and I think honestly I'll miss him the most because I won't be able to pick up the phone and talk to him :P) .....
I'm not the type that is like super crazy about holding on to the place I live. I moved like 6 times before I was 14...... so I'm use to going to new places and I LIKE the adventure of exploring new things and places. The only thing is, I've never done it on my OWN. It was always my WHOLE family doing the move and the exploring. I'm 25 now, I'm definitely old enough to venture out on my own. I wasn't scared at all up until laast night. Then suddenly it hit me that I'm sad and scared.
But part of the reason I'm moving (aside from the cheaper living in Denver, and the fact that I want to just get out on my own) is to be closer to my boyfriend who I miss incredibly bad. I'm SO torn. I miss him, I want to be closer to him, but I know I'll miss some things back in Chicago (def not the weather tho :P)
It's normal to be scared of the unknown.....but you shouldn't let it stop you from trying new things.
My daughter went through the same thing a few years back. She loves her family and friends where she grew up but always wanted to move to a city that she loved to visit over the years. My advice to her was....go for it. As you get older the only thing you regret are the things you didn't try. If you try and it doesn't work out, you can always go back home.
Two years later, my daughter has great new friends, a wonderful career, and her beloved dog (who she had to leave behind) is now living with her in her new hometown.
Being scared is normal when you're moving to a new place AND esp. when you're leaving your family and friends behind. I think it sounds like a good move. You are definitely old enough, spending more time with your boyfriend will be good for you, and Denver is a really nice place to live. The best thing of all? You are only 90 miles from your family. That's nothing really.
I am in a similar situation. I have lived here in Asheville, NC since my parents moved me here in '89 ~ almost 20 years! I am tired of the same old same old and just want my family to have fun so we decided to move to Orlando! We are leaving in 10 days and are so excited! Even though I'm 34 it's the first time I'll be away from my mom and dad and I'm sad about that but I have to do what's best for me and my family.
It will be hard but just know they are not far from you and it will be a good experience and you will love having your space
Good luck with whatever you decide to do and have fun!
I can't, cuz he's attached to everyone in my family. When I was away at school he got more attached to my mom then anyone (even me) and she takes care of him mainly (only cuz she's the first one up in the morning (5am))..... so I couldn't take him away from his home. He's already kind of a skiddish cat and moving him to a new place entirely would probably traumatize him. I wouldn't wana do that to him.
Being scared is normal when you're moving to a new place AND esp. when you're leaving your family and friends behind. I think it sounds like a good move. You are definitely old enough, spending more time with your boyfriend will be good for you, and Denver is a really nice place to live. The best thing of all? You are only 90 miles from your family. That's nothing really.
I am in a similar situation. I have lived here in Asheville, NC since my parents moved me here in '89 ~ almost 20 years! I am tired of the same old same old and just want my family to have fun so we decided to move to Orlando! We are leaving in 10 days and are so excited! Even though I'm 34 it's the first time I'll be away from my mom and dad and I'm sad about that but I have to do what's best for me and my family.
It will be hard but just know they are not far from you and it will be a good experience and you will love having your space
Good luck with whatever you decide to do and have fun!
the space thing is the part I'm looking forward to. Our house is pretty small with 5 adults living in it (18, 23, 25, and two parents)..... My sister just recently moved back from school and has been driving me NUTS!!! She took over the bathroom as if it's her own! UGH! I seriously can't wait to be out because of the space factor. I just know I'll miss my fam a lot
You can do it! I moved to FL for college when I was 20, leaving all of my family behind in IL. I knew I would miss them, but focused more on the excitement of experiencing new things than how much I would miss everyone.
Since then, I have moved many times, from one end of the country to the other. And I will keep on going. All of my immediate family still lives in IL, so I know I can always go back and see everyone when I want to. Due to finances, though, I haven't been able to go home very much, which I am very upset about. The worst part is being apart for the holidays, but if you are close to your family, you will stay close to them wherever you go. I talk to my mom almost everyday on the phone and still feel like I am a huge part of her everyday life.
Go on and have fun! This could be the start of a new, exciting life...
the space thing is the part I'm looking forward to. Our house is pretty small with 5 adults living in it (18, 23, 25, and two parents)..... My sister just recently moved back from school and has been driving me NUTS!!! She took over the bathroom as if it's her own! UGH! I seriously can't wait to be out because of the space factor. I just know I'll miss my fam a lot
I bet! Having your own space would be so nice!!! Of course you'll miss your family and your cat but your cat will be happy with your mom and your family will not be far away
There's nothing wrong with moving somewhere because of your boyfriend. Regardless of what happens with your relationships in life you still have the experiences and the value they add, and part of this experience is understanding who you are and discovering a new place.
If you didn't miss your family and if you weren't a little scared, there would be something wrong with you. It's completely normal and you'll probably feel a little uneasy at times after you move too. Again, for any healthy and normal person, this is all standard. One bit of advice is to make sure you budget some time within the first 3 months of living in Denver to fly back to Chicago for a few days.
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Leaving the nest
