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Old 02-08-2012, 05:46 AM
 
Location: North Texas
24,561 posts, read 40,069,701 times
Reputation: 28547

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Quote:
Originally Posted by dreamofmonterey View Post
Please dont get into Confederate vs. Yankee here . I am really curious if anyone has an actual example of chivalry, or courtesy they have experienced while living in the south....(vacation doesnt really count, we all know the hotel concierge makes the guest feel welcome)

For those who are from or have family in the south, please if you can give an example? its greatly appreciated...
Not in DFW...too many out-of-staters have moved here and changed the culture. It's getting more and more unusual to meet someone here who is actually from here.
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Old 02-08-2012, 09:21 AM
 
Location: Raleigh, NC
1,580 posts, read 2,875,100 times
Reputation: 1712
Quote:
Originally Posted by brentwoodgirl View Post
Here's what we do and what we're teaching our children:

Say yes/no Ma'am and Sir to your elders.
Ask "ma'am?" or "sir?" if you don't hear or understand something instead of saying "what" or "huh"
Hold the door for people.
Hold the elevator for people.
Give up your seat to the elderly, pregnant women or anyone else who appears to need it.
Take homemade bread/brownies/etc. to a new neighbor with a card with our names & phone numbers
Take dinner to someone who just had a baby or lost a relative
Offer to return someone's grocery cart if they are done with it and we're walking by.
Thank anyone who does something for you, waiters, cashiers, etc.
If an adult drops something, esp. an elderly or pregnant person, I send my kids to pick it up so the person won't have to bend down.
Etc.

Generally, it's just about being aware of the people around you and doing little things to help them. You don't have to be Southern to do those things. I think the only thing on my list that is truly Southern is the ma'am and sirs.
That is a good list. Another one I would add is smiling, waving, or saying hi to people you walk/drive by. Simple acknowledgement of other people as human beings. This is more difficult to do the larger the city, but my neighbors and I wave (even the ones I don't specifically know) and it adds a real sense of community.

And I agree that someone does not have to be Southern to have good manners. I have encountered polite people and rude people in all parts of the country. I will say that in my experience on average a typical southern person tends to be more polite and have better manners than a typical person from elsewhere in the country.
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Old 02-08-2012, 09:26 AM
 
Location: OKIE-Ville
5,542 posts, read 9,429,881 times
Reputation: 3296
Quote:
Originally Posted by dreamofmonterey View Post
Please dont get into Confederate vs. Yankee here . I am really curious if anyone has an actual example of chivalry, or courtesy they have experienced while living in the south....(vacation doesnt really count, we all know the hotel concierge makes the guest feel welcome)

For those who are from or have family in the south, please if you can give an example? its greatly appreciated...
One that I still see here in Oklahoma with the older crowd is that men stand when a woman comes to the table. For example, at holidays especially, after my mom has cooked a big meal, my elderly daddy still musters the strength to stand when she walks into the dining room as a sign of admiration and respect. Of course, all us other men follow suit! We also do this when we're out at a restaurant waiting on the ladies in our family.

That's a kind of chivalry that doesn't happen too many places anymore it seems.

Best of luck on your move.

Blessings,

Proud 4th Generation Okie
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Old 02-08-2012, 11:04 AM
 
Location: Old Town Alexandria
14,496 posts, read 26,497,565 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Bass&Catfish2008 View Post
One that I still see here in Oklahoma with the older crowd is that men stand when a woman comes to the table. For example, at holidays especially, after my mom has cooked a big meal, my elderly daddy still musters the strength to stand when she walks into the dining room as a sign of admiration and respect. Of course, all us other men follow suit! We also do this when we're out at a restaurant waiting on the ladies in our family.

That's a kind of chivalry that doesn't happen too many places anymore it seems.

Best of luck on your move.

Blessings,

Proud 4th Generation Okie

Thats nice .

brentwoodgirl nice post. Polite children are always welcome. Up north my gf and I were at a University concert. A mother had two little children who stole an elderly womans seat. I pointed this out to the Mom.

It probably has to do with the upbringing as well. Not really a north south issue. in Carter County however, the men do not hold doors (for their wives even) and walk ahead of them, so Im wondering if this is a regional thing..
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Old 02-08-2012, 11:12 AM
 
Location: Atlanta, GA
441 posts, read 882,226 times
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that's one thing i really really like about here.

just the general greeting people when you walk into a store, people being polite and friendly, people saying please and thank you instead of being gruff and rude, holding the door open for others, and being generally respectful towards others instead of being brash and cutting you in line, etc.

here, you can strike up a conversation with a total stranger in a grocery store and it's not weird or unconventional. its like, people are slower and calmer. i don't mean that as an insult - what i mean is, people don't rush by and take everything on before running to do the next thing - it's more calm and laid back and the pace of life is slower and more relaxed. people give the time of day to others.

as for an example?

yesterday walking into a QT (gas station) i grabbed a donut and a hot dog at 6 in the evening. the gentleman behind me then commented on how it's a classic american meal and we started talking, to the extent that the cashier got involved as well. might not seem like much but there are places where i've not seen such and they tend to be bigger cities...

southern hospitality is alive and well if you ask me, and it's definitely one of my favourite things about here.
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Old 02-08-2012, 11:37 AM
 
Location: Florida
11,669 posts, read 17,815,535 times
Reputation: 8238
Quote:
Originally Posted by icecreamsandwich View Post
that's one thing i really really like about here.

just the general greeting people when you walk into a store, people being polite and friendly, people saying please and thank you instead of being gruff and rude, holding the door open for others, and being generally respectful towards others instead of being brash and cutting you in line, etc.

here, you can strike up a conversation with a total stranger in a grocery store and it's not weird or unconventional. its like, people are slower and calmer. i don't mean that as an insult - what i mean is, people don't rush by and take everything on before running to do the next thing - it's more calm and laid back and the pace of life is slower and more relaxed. people give the time of day to others.

as for an example?

yesterday walking into a QT (gas station) i grabbed a donut and a hot dog at 6 in the evening. the gentleman behind me then commented on how it's a classic american meal and we started talking, to the extent that the cashier got involved as well. might not seem like much but there are places where i've not seen such and they tend to be bigger cities...

southern hospitality is alive and well if you ask me, and it's definitely one of my favourite things about here.
From my experience, most people in ATL are very friendly indeed. However, I found the city and metro area in general to be just as fast paced as the Northeast.
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Old 02-08-2012, 11:50 AM
 
Location: Bellingham, WA
9,726 posts, read 16,662,053 times
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Lived in TN for 32 years and I don't recall any polite actions that I haven't also seen here, only I've probably seen more here.
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Old 02-08-2012, 02:14 PM
 
5,064 posts, read 5,694,827 times
Reputation: 4768
Here's a great article wmsn4life posted in the Nashville forum. It about 2 women from NYC visiting Nashville and their impressions. It's really funny.
Here's a couple of excerpts from the beginning and the end:
Quote:
This past weekend, we took our Other selves to Nashville, Tennessee, aka Music City, aka The Nicest Place on Earth (sorry, Disneyworld). It was, in a word, delicious. And in another word, nice. Nicety nice nice nice. Seriously.
Quote:
Moral of the story: Much like the banana pudding and rich Southern food on which we gorged ourselves last weekend, it only seems right to reserve our doses of exceptional and indiscriminate kindness and good manners. As soft as we’d get from eating cheesecake on a stick or pulled pork every day of the week, the same goes for indulging in nice. These types of luxuries should be seen as treats to be enjoyed on special occasions and vacations from the real world. Otherwise, we’d never know to appreciate them.
And in the middle, there is a Banana Pudding Fest in rural TN, "chic hobos" in designer jeans and Raybans, and an elevator that was so nice it should have said, "6th floor! Doors closing! Puppies and rainbows are my favorite!”

Here's the link:
Nina In New York: A New Yorker’s Visit Below The Mason-Dixon Line « CBS New York
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Old 02-09-2012, 07:44 AM
 
14,256 posts, read 26,776,323 times
Reputation: 4560
Quote:
Originally Posted by KodeBlue View Post
In my part of the south people aren't as polite. People don't acknowledge you're existence. They won't hold doors, they don't greet you when you walk past them on the sidewalk. Some do, but its rare.
Baltimore is drastically different from the rest of the South.
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Old 02-09-2012, 08:06 PM
 
Location: Old Town Alexandria
14,496 posts, read 26,497,565 times
Reputation: 8965
Quote:
Originally Posted by polo89 View Post
Baltimore is drastically different from the rest of the South.
Baltimore seems more like NoVa to me....more transplants and very busy, my brother works at UMM...people are from all over, except Baltimore itself, lol.
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