Philly or Minneapolis. Philly has gotten some good attention already, here's info about Mpls:
sunny: yes, including during winter
humidity: less than New Orleans, more than Denver
4 seasons: absolutely
severe snow: definitely gets a good amount of snow, but not as much as New England
icy: nope, too far north. To be honest, you are unlikely to find a place that only gets "dustings" of snow that doesn't also deal with extremely dangerous ice.
well-educated: definitely
non-materialistic/pretentious: yep
status-flaunting: nothing close to what you'd see in other parts of the country (people definitely won't think you're less than if you didn't go to an Ivy)
clothing: well it's a big city, you'll get all kinds
K-12 schools: among the best in the country
higher education: UofM, Macalaster, Carleton all within reach
jobs: low unemployment rate, important national and regional economic center, should have no problems finding work in your field
dramatic scenery: Northwoods, Lake Superior, and Boundary Waters to the north, Driftless to the south
lakes: obviously
beaches: lake beaches, yes
COL: way cheaper than NYC/LA/SF, cheaper than Seattle/Boston, similar to Portland/Charlotte
public transit: very very good
park and ride: definitely
high skyline: how about two?
http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedi...e-20070805.jpg ...
http://shelleysellsrealestate.files....ay_skyline.jpg
NBA: Timberwolves
NFL: Vikings
MLB: Twins