Austin, Tuscan, Chapel Hill, Boulder, Charlottesville, or good ole California? (transplants, house)
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I'm working on a couple of undergrad degrees so I'm moving to college-towns. I've lived in rural Georgia for a decade, Nashville for 7 years and am currently in northwest Montana. I was planning on going to the University of Montana but I've changed my major and now it's out of the question. I have a 2 year old son who will (a) need friends and (b) not be treated like the plague. In the south, I am used to hospitality and making friends with everyone. In Montana, it has taken me 6 months to make 2 acquaintances. Montanans are friendly at first, but they hate everyone who isn't from here. I want to move because of school and because we need a freakin' social life. At my son's music class (that we attended for 10 weeks), the moms would invite each other out to the park or lunch while my son and I were getting ready to leave. Never in my life... I don't care if I know you or not, if I'm going to publicly announce a gathering - I'm going to invite you. Ok, they didn't invite me (boohoo), what really ticked me off was the fact that they didn't invite my son. He played with those kids for months and he's not allowed to go play with them at the park because he's a "transplant"? Nope. Over it.
Ok, my question... Which city is more welcoming to outsiders? I've read of everyone's animosity towards Californians and New Yorkers (which I don't understand because IMO they are some of the nicest people) and I'm worried we'll be treated like transplants. I'm non-religious and don't put myself in a political box. I love our constitution but I also believe in change. I'm a gun owner but I support gay rights. Diversity rocks. That's why I wanted out of the south. I wouldn't let my son grow up around "you're going to hell because _____" or "gay people don't deserve rights" or the abundance of racial slurs.
Austin, TX
Tuscan, AZ
Chapel Hill, NC
Boulder, CO
Charlottesville, VA
SF Bay area, CA <-- Really don't think I can afford a house with a big enough yard to accommodate my 2 German Shepherds, but I love the school (and the beach)
Not looking for hostility here, just want some personal opinions from people who've lived in or around these cities. Thanks!
I take it you mean Tucson, AZ and not Tuscany (region of Italy)? The answer to this question will likely have a big impact on the responses you receive.
As a college student who lives in Tucson, Arizona, it is very acceptable for outsiders. I jokingly like to call the U of A "UC Tucson"
Anyway, Arizona has a "live and let live" culture that reflects all of your viewpoints you listed. There are gay bars here (and I frequently see gays holding hands), and open carry, and there are few qualms with them. Religion is not that big here in Tucson either. Also, most of Arizona is filled with recent transplants anyway, so it's kind of hard to hate them. Most families are second or first generation Arizonan here. The ones who aren't (fifth generation Arizonan here) could not really care less because we are used to Southern Arizona's rapid growth in the recent years. Tucson is also very affordable.
I can't speak on the other cities (I've never been to them, who knows) but if you can accept our heat then you will probably like this place.
I'm working on a couple of undergrad degrees so I'm moving to college-towns. I've lived in rural Georgia for a decade, Nashville for 7 years and am currently in northwest Montana. I was planning on going to the University of Montana but I've changed my major and now it's out of the question. I have a 2 year old son who will (a) need friends and (b) not be treated like the plague. In the south, I am used to hospitality and making friends with everyone. In Montana, it has taken me 6 months to make 2 acquaintances. Montanans are friendly at first, but they hate everyone who isn't from here. I want to move because of school and because we need a freakin' social life. At my son's music class (that we attended for 10 weeks), the moms would invite each other out to the park or lunch while my son and I were getting ready to leave. Never in my life... I don't care if I know you or not, if I'm going to publicly announce a gathering - I'm going to invite you. Ok, they didn't invite me (boohoo), what really ticked me off was the fact that they didn't invite my son. He played with those kids for months and he's not allowed to go play with them at the park because he's a "transplant"? Nope. Over it.
Ok, my question... Which city is more welcoming to outsiders? I've read of everyone's animosity towards Californians and New Yorkers (which I don't understand because IMO they are some of the nicest people) and I'm worried we'll be treated like transplants. I'm non-religious and don't put myself in a political box. I love our constitution but I also believe in change. I'm a gun owner but I support gay rights. Diversity rocks. That's why I wanted out of the south. I wouldn't let my son grow up around "you're going to hell because _____" or "gay people don't deserve rights" or the abundance of racial slurs.
Austin, TX
Tuscan, AZ
Chapel Hill, NC
Boulder, CO
Charlottesville, VA
SF Bay area, CA <-- Really don't think I can afford a house with a big enough yard to accommodate my 2 German Shepherds, but I love the school (and the beach)
Not looking for hostility here, just want some personal opinions from people who've lived in or around these cities. Thanks!
I know both Chapel Hill and Charlottesville quite well. Either would be a terrific fit as both are welcoming to outsiders, largely judgement free in terms of residents opinions of others, not overtly religious, feature a mix of people from all over thanks to the universities and have terrific public schools. I would give an edge to Chapel Hill because of it's location and neighboring proximity to two other similar communities (Durham and Carrboro).
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Frankly, for what you're looking for I wouldn't find any of them objectionable. Any of them have their share of transplants, so I don't expect that you'll encounter the exclusionary attitude that you have in Montana.
You pretty much listed all the cities I've lived in and loved the most (except Chapel Hill- I've never been there). I can't speak to the suburbs of these cities, but if you live close to campus you will find very welcoming, diverse, family-friendly communities. If I were you I'd pick a location based on what kind of weather and city size you prefer. Enjoy endless summers and can tolerate triple digit temps for 3 months straight? Pick Tucson or Austin. Want all 4 seasons and gorgeous autumns? Pick Boulder or Charlottesville. Want a big city that offers the best of music, art, film, food, and culture with a dash of quirkiness thrown in (and also by far the friendliest place I've ever lived)? Pick Austin. Tucson is a smaller city than Austin and has a similar southwestern vibe. I would describe it as more pro-gun ownership and a little quieter though. And it has gorgeous mountains- which I missed sorely while living in Austin. Boulder is extremely left-leaning and progressive to the point where I felt like everyone was a bunch of stereotypical liberal clones, but you'll find a good mix of political leanings the more rural you get. Also, if you're outdoorsy, it takes a while to find parks and trails that aren't totally crowded! But it's ridiculously beautiful there and you have easy access to so many great winter sports areas. Charlottesville is one of the smaller cities and therefore seems to have less to offer. But the preschools (the best are actually right on campus!) and little kid programs and playgroups are awesome- it seems to be a very family-focused city with lots of great options for single parents. There's a great downtown pedestrian mall in Charlottesville that is a smaller version of Pearl Street- the downtown pedestrian mall in Boulder. Chapel Hill has one of these too. It's a great place to meet up with people or spend an afternoon watching street performers and eating ice cream. Good luck with your decision! I don't think you could go wrong with any of these places!
Those are all exactly the places that I was looking into moving from California for. I am also a gun owning semiliberal person who went to CAL.
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Never in my life... I don't care if I know you or not, if I'm going to publicly announce a gathering - I'm going to invite you. Ok, they didn't invite me (boohoo), what really ticked me off was the fact that they didn't invite my son. He played with those kids for months and he's not allowed to go play with them at the park because he's a "transplant"? Nope. Over it. 
