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Old 12-30-2014, 05:36 PM
 
Location: Wonderland
67,666 posts, read 60,218,081 times
Reputation: 100999

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Quote:
Originally Posted by Mandalorian View Post
I try to give an honest opinion about places I have experience with. I tell it like it is, the good and the bad. That's really what people come here for. To get insider information from people with firsthand experience.
If I think someone is looking for honest feedback, I give it. But most of these threads aren't started by sincere people who are honestly trying to decide between several locations, or being transferred and looking for real help relocating. Many of the threads in this section of the forum remind me of junior high drama - "My city/state is better than your state - nanny nanny boo boo!" "Let me tell you what I hate about where YOU live!" It's so tiresome.

My daughter's job moved her to Idaho once. Now - I've never been to Idaho and had only gathered a very few random impressions about it from watching My Own Private Idaho and Napoleon Dynamite! So yeah - I can't say I had an overly positive concept of Idaho. But I didn't get all negative with her about it because she was the one moving there and I thought I'd see what she had to say about it.

She ended up loving it! Sure, there were some negatives (like everywhere) and she still prefers Texas to Idaho - but she would be the first person to defend the fine state of Idaho - a state she was never interested in, where she moved basically against her will, and which she initially dreaded moving to.

Believe it or not - and most of the regulars here know how much I love Texas - I initially moved to Texas totally against my will and HATED IT for the entire first year I lived here. Now, twenty something years later, I am a huge fan of the state of Texas. That doesn't mean I think it's perfect - no place is. But it's perfect for ME and that's what matters. And heck, I didn't even know I'd love it and I fought against moving here, wasted at least one precious year of my time here being negative and fretful and feeling superior and thinking everyone who loved Texas must be crazy or stupid or ignorant or redneck or a combination of all of the above.

So I don't generally talk negatively about where other people choose to live. Now, I will state what I don't personally care for if the conversation seems to require it, but I try to make it very apparent that that is just my personal opinion and that doesn't mean others will feel the same way.

To me it's just a matter of common courtesy and maturity but hey, what do I know? I live in Texas so I must be an idiot.
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Old 12-30-2014, 06:29 PM
 
8,797 posts, read 6,130,601 times
Reputation: 12075
Quote:
Originally Posted by KathrynAragon View Post
If I think someone is looking for honest feedback, I give it. But most of these threads aren't started by sincere people who are honestly trying to decide between several locations, or being transferred and looking for real help relocating. Many of the threads in this section of the forum remind me of junior high drama - "My city/state is better than your state - nanny nanny boo boo!" "Let me tell you what I hate about where YOU live!" It's so tiresome.
I agree. Many threads in this forum and the city vs city sub-forum can be very childish. Now I follow several of the northeast state forums, among many others and I find that the interaction in those forums is very serious and beneficial. In the Maine, New Hampshire and even Massachusetts state forums, people ask genuine questions and receive honest feedback from almost everyone involved. Now when you delve into some of the city specific sub-forums some egoism starts to appear. I think immaturity definitely increases where the discussion of big cities is involved; not saying that everything written about the big cities is immature of course.
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Old 12-30-2014, 06:38 PM
 
Location: Who Cares, USA
2,341 posts, read 3,565,039 times
Reputation: 2258
Quote:
Originally Posted by AtkinsonDan View Post
I agree. Many threads in this forum and the city vs city sub-forum can be very childish. Now I follow several of the northeast state forums, among many others and I find that the interaction in those forums is very serious and beneficial. In the Maine, New Hampshire and even Massachusetts state forums, people ask genuine questions and receive honest feedback from almost everyone involved. Now when you delve into some of the city specific sub-forums some egoism starts to appear. I think immaturity definitely increases where the discussion of big cities is involved; not saying that everything written about the big cities is immature of course.
Consider yourself lucky with the Northeast forums. I've seen some state and city forums here (I won't drop names) that make the General U.S. and City vs City forums look positively refined by comparison. In one particular big city's forum that I visit from time to time, there are several resident "school yard bullies", who dominate nearly every single thread, and throw as many gratuitous and out of line below-the-belt insults as they can muster up... consistently. It has gotten to the point where I won't even bother to post there anymore, and I'm not exactly the type who's shy about speaking my mind. I could get in trouble for saying this, but a lot of it falls on the mods in said state and city forums picking favorites and letting this behavior slide. That might get my post here deleted, but it's just the plain truth.
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Old 12-30-2014, 08:43 PM
 
92,035 posts, read 122,173,887 times
Reputation: 18141
Quote:
Originally Posted by KathrynAragon View Post
If I think someone is looking for honest feedback, I give it. But most of these threads aren't started by sincere people who are honestly trying to decide between several locations, or being transferred and looking for real help relocating. Many of the threads in this section of the forum remind me of junior high drama - "My city/state is better than your state - nanny nanny boo boo!" "Let me tell you what I hate about where YOU live!" It's so tiresome.

My daughter's job moved her to Idaho once. Now - I've never been to Idaho and had only gathered a very few random impressions about it from watching My Own Private Idaho and Napoleon Dynamite! So yeah - I can't say I had an overly positive concept of Idaho. But I didn't get all negative with her about it because she was the one moving there and I thought I'd see what she had to say about it.

She ended up loving it! Sure, there were some negatives (like everywhere) and she still prefers Texas to Idaho - but she would be the first person to defend the fine state of Idaho - a state she was never interested in, where she moved basically against her will, and which she initially dreaded moving to.

Believe it or not - and most of the regulars here know how much I love Texas - I initially moved to Texas totally against my will and HATED IT for the entire first year I lived here. Now, twenty something years later, I am a huge fan of the state of Texas. That doesn't mean I think it's perfect - no place is. But it's perfect for ME and that's what matters. And heck, I didn't even know I'd love it and I fought against moving here, wasted at least one precious year of my time here being negative and fretful and feeling superior and thinking everyone who loved Texas must be crazy or stupid or ignorant or redneck or a combination of all of the above.

So I don't generally talk negatively about where other people choose to live. Now, I will state what I don't personally care for if the conversation seems to require it, but I try to make it very apparent that that is just my personal opinion and that doesn't mean others will feel the same way.

To me it's just a matter of common courtesy and maturity but hey, what do I know? I live in Texas so I must be an idiot.
I really wish I could rep you, but I've given too many out. This is so true and have dealt with the first portion of this post currently and it is oddly enough something that comes up every so often with the same person. So, I know what you are talking about.
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Old 12-30-2014, 08:45 PM
 
Location: Who Cares, USA
2,341 posts, read 3,565,039 times
Reputation: 2258
Quote:
Originally Posted by McdonaldIndy View Post
I have seen and heard stories of that behavior too recently.
There's quite a bit of fame around the internet these days with regards to the childish posts on C-D.
Here's an example of a thread about it: city data forum - SkyscraperCity
Wow, haha! They pretty much nailed it for the most part. Still, it's not all bad here. If it was, I'd be long gone by now. Some people here are actually pretty insightful and engaging. They keep me hanging in there. MOST aren't though. A lot of people come here just to take out their passive-aggressive angst on other random strangers via the relative safety of the internet. It's petty, childish, and stupid, but it's not unique to C-D. I've seen far worse in YouTube comments. I mean some really, really sick stuff. They really take off the gloves there.
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Old 12-30-2014, 08:50 PM
 
92,035 posts, read 122,173,887 times
Reputation: 18141
Quote:
Originally Posted by Bobloblawslawblog View Post
Wow, haha! They pretty much nailed it for the most part. Still, it's not all bad here. If it was, I'd be long gone by now. Some people here are actually pretty insightful and engaging. They keep me hanging in there. MOST aren't though. A lot of people come here just to take out their passive-aggressive angst on other random strangers via the relative safety of the internet. It's petty, childish, and stupid, but it's not unique to C-D. I've seen far worse in YouTube comments. I mean some really, really sick stuff. They really take off the gloves there.
Again, I totally understand this and agree.
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Old 12-31-2014, 03:20 AM
 
Location: Kent, UK/ Rhode Island, US
654 posts, read 793,645 times
Reputation: 851
I leave this forum slight annoyed 90% of the time.
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Old 12-31-2014, 06:04 AM
 
Location: Tampa
734 posts, read 914,273 times
Reputation: 769
Quote:
Originally Posted by Omatic View Post
I've been hanging around on this forum for a while and while its often great for getting information on cities, the city bashing drives me insane!

Most people here obviously favor the big cities: Austin, Atlanta, Nashville, Chicago, Los Angeles, San Diego, Portland, etc and that's fine. You like what you like. But it's really stupid that people associate conservative with being backwards rednecks, or bashing cities that aren't "cultured" enough because those cities don't have enough ethnic cuisine or a hundred art museums.

Have you ever thought not everyone wants those things? Like me for example. I am a young adult but I have no desire to visit art galleries or night clubs. But I don't complain about cities that have those things.

I mean I like zoos, shopping, restaurants, sports and beaches. I'm not boring, I just have a different idea of fun. For example, I was looking at states like South Carolina and Arkansas because I'm interesting in moving to a warmer, more southern state. I was shocked at what I saw about some cities in those states.

Little Rock was called a boring backwards hillbilly town and the people who live there consider a Willie Nelson concert culture. Oh gosh, they like something other than art museums, coffee and Indian food! Quick, call them uneducated rednecks because they don't have the same interests as you!

Charleston had a few supporters but most bashed it because according to them, Charlotte and really North Carolina as a whole had more cities. To them bigger = better. Well not everyone is interested living in crowded, noisy cities with a million people and a bunch of traffic.

I've never been to Arkansas but after reading about it, it sounds pretty cool. I like the whole "floating on the river on a nice summer day" thing. And interested in the hot springs and mountains. I've been in Myrtle Beach in South Carolina, not Charleston, but I love the awesome coastal city/beach scene. Also interested in Louisville/Lexington but even those are outshined by Nashville because Nashville has more, more, more.

I'm just saying don't look down upon those people who don't want "more, more, more". Don't look upon those people who are perfectly content spending the day at the river, at a horse race, a country/rock concert, or canoeing and would rather do those things than go to a international ballet show or something like that.
Try moving to Florida, lol. Constant bashing in the media, from friends, from family, etc. I couldn't give two ****s about what other people think, however, and I'm glad to see you don't either.

Most people let others think for them, so when places like Austin, Seattle, Denver, Portland, and San Francisco are glorified, they believe it and rant about how wonderful and idyllic they are. When a punching bag of a city gets mentioned, everyone jumps on the hate train. Just look around this forum. Group-think permeates this place.

**** 'em. Make up your own mind and be happy.
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Old 12-31-2014, 06:09 AM
 
Location: Tampa
734 posts, read 914,273 times
Reputation: 769
Quote:
Originally Posted by waviking24 View Post
No one should ever come to this site for real discussion
Truer words have never been spoken.
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Old 12-31-2014, 04:43 PM
 
4,899 posts, read 6,182,854 times
Reputation: 7472
Quote:
Originally Posted by AtkinsonDan View Post
I agree. Many threads in this forum and the city vs city sub-forum can be very childish. Now I follow several of the northeast state forums, among many others and I find that the interaction in those forums is very serious and beneficial. In the Maine, New Hampshire and even Massachusetts state forums, people ask genuine questions and receive honest feedback from almost everyone involved. Now when you delve into some of the city specific sub-forums some egoism starts to appear. I think immaturity definitely increases where the discussion of big cities is involved; not saying that everything written about the big cities is immature of course.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Bobloblawslawblog View Post
Consider yourself lucky with the Northeast forums. I've seen some state and city forums here (I won't drop names) that make the General U.S. and City vs City forums look positively refined by comparison. In one particular big city's forum that I visit from time to time, there are several resident "school yard bullies", who dominate nearly every single thread, and throw as many gratuitous and out of line below-the-belt insults as they can muster up... consistently. It has gotten to the point where I won't even bother to post there anymore, and I'm not exactly the type who's shy about speaking my mind. I could get in trouble for saying this, but a lot of it falls on the mods in said state and city forums picking favorites and letting this behavior slide. That might get my post here deleted, but it's just the plain truth.
^^^ The city and/or city vs city forums are only opinions and we all know the catch phrase
about opinions. I agree with Boblob that there are regular posters who dominate these discussions
and wait (throughout the day) to contradict a comment not to their liking.
Like Boblob...I only post occasionally as honestly as I can - then comes the piling-on. They
must get the rush of a power trip.
Happy New Year to cities A-Z.
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